Chapter 30
It sounds too trivial. The last words I thought about before falling asleep.
The first ones I thought about when waking back up.
But that came to an abrupt end when I looked at my phone and realized it was already eight.
Shit! Why didn’t my alarm go off? Why didn’t Kay wake me up?
I could forget about my morning jog, and if I didn’t get moving I could kiss my training match with Malia goodbye too.
I jumped out of bed and hopped to the bathroom to brush my teeth, thanking my yesterday-me for taking a shower once I got back.
Scrubbing my tongue, I looked into the mirror.
I looked rushed but rested. Relaxed. Satisfied, a voice in my head whispered, and images and memories immediately filled my mind.
Vince and me in the Jeep, me on his lap, him between my legs.
I was starting to get horny. I could both see it in the mirror and feel it.
Damn. Would people be able to see what happened last night on my face all day long?
Would I ever be able to look at a Jeep again without thinking about what had happened on the back seat?
What Vince had done? With his hands, his mouth, his tongue?
Before my cheeks could turn the color of raw salmon, I spit out my toothpaste and splashed cold water on my face.
When just a little while later I bounded down the stairs in a dark-blue tennis skirt and a red-and-white top, I remembered why Kay hadn’t woken me up.
She had driven to Honolulu to see her accountant.
And that’s why I’d set up the match with Malia.
Who—I looked at my watch—would be showing up at the tennis school in ten minutes at the latest. I downed a glass of water, grabbed a banana, and shot out the door.
Hurrying to the school, I noticed the sky filled with fluffy clouds that kept on drifting across the sun.
I took the shortest way that would still allow me to eat my banana and read my messages.
My mother had sent selfies of her and Dad hiking in the mountains, and I was hit by a wave of sadness thinking we’d only see one another again in three weeks.
I just skimmed the rest. One from Milan asking about my progress, one from Laurie asking if I’d have time to see her tonight.
Which is exactly what her brother was asking me.
Uh-oh. Laurie and I hadn’t done anything together since our film evening, and the last time we saw each other was already a good week ago.
I didn’t want her to feel abandoned. But I wanted to see Vince too.
I couldn’t lie. It sounds too trivial. I kept on wondering what he meant by that.
How he meant it. In general or…as far as the two of us were concerned?
Just like the coming evening, it was accompanied by a wide range of emotions.
Excitement and joy, confusion and…worry.
As much as the romantic part of me wanted to melt away, the fact that Vince might feel something for me beyond physical attraction set off alarm bells in the rational part of me.
It was simply out of the question. Whether I wanted it or not didn’t matter.
It was impossible. I hadn’t come here to stay.
* * *
When I got back from training in the late afternoon, Kay was standing in the kitchen peeling a mango.
We hadn’t seen each other yet today. After my match against Malia, I’d gotten on the ergometer to cool down.
And after that, for an hour I’d returned tennis balls shot at me at seventy-five miles per hour.
Gabe had given it his all, but my arms and legs were as heavy as lead.
All I longed for was the couch. And I would definitely not be doing anything else today but eating dinner and falling into bed.
I’d already canceled with Laurie. I was going to write Vince a long message after I’d relaxed a little.
“You’ve got a visitor.”
I briefly entertained the silly hope that it might be him, but he would never have just turned up here like that.
“I told her that she could wait for you here.”
Her? I followed Kay’s index finger to the terrace, where Laurie was sitting, typing away on her phone.
“You let someone with the last name of Greenfield into your house?” I teased, dropping my tennis bag onto the ground.
She rolled her eyes only half-seriously and cut the yellowish orange fruit into pieces. I pulled off my tennis shoes and socks and walked outside.
“Hey!” I called out.
She looked up and smiled. A bit more restrained than usual it seemed.
“How long have you been here?”
“Five minutes tops.” She made a carefree gesture. “Your godmother said it’d be okay for me to wait for you here.”
“Of course.” I sat down next to her at the table. “Do you want anything to drink?”
“Thanks. Your godmother already offered. She was really nice.”
Laurie sounded surprised, and I had to laugh. “You mean for being the local bitch?”
She grinned. “Well, I wasn’t sure she’d even open the door for me.”
“You don’t look enough like your brother for that.”
Once again her smile looked more reserved than what I was used to from her. She let her gaze wander. “This is a really nice place.”
“Yeah, you can get by okay,” I said with a wink.
“But”—her eyes came back to me—“your plans haven’t changed, right?”
“My plans?”
“Well, I mean, you’re flying to the US Open. Or aren’t you?”
“Of course.” I furrowed my brow. “Why should something have changed there?”
Laurie hesitated. “Well, I mean… You and Vince, you all…seem to get along pretty well.”
“We…um…yeah. I think so.” My cheeks began to grow flushed as the memories of last night flashed before my mind’s eye. One in particular. His head between my legs. His tongue…
“I don’t have anything against that,” she said, before quickly adding, “It doesn’t have anything to do with me. But”—she fixed her eyes on me—“please don’t give him any false hopes.”
“What do you mean?”
She let a little time pass. “Vince is just coming out of a pretty hard period and—” She bit her lower lip as if she’d already said too much. “This here is a new start for him. Oahu. The hostel. He’s happier than he has been in a long time.”
Unable to follow, I blinked several times.
“The last thing he needs right now is someone breaking his heart.”
I froze. “Breaking his heart? Laurie, I… That’s not how things are between us. We’ve…we’ve just made out a little.” It sounds too trivial. I pushed Vince’s voice aside. “Nothing more than that.” I paused. “Or…has Vince said otherwise?”
“He hasn’t said a thing.” She sighed. “Because he goes through the roof the second I bring it up. That was the case the other day when you all got back from Kahuku.”
“Well, maybe he just isn’t all that interested in sharing his love life with his little sister,” I suggested carefully. Hadn’t those even been his words?
“I don’t expect anything of the kind. But I have the feeling he likes you. A lot. And this time I’m not going to just stand around on the sidelines when…” She broke off and pressed her lips together. “Just don’t hurt him, okay?”
My mind continued to lag behind, so I just nodded. If Laurie was asking me not to break her brother’s heart, that meant…did that mean that she thought… And could that be true? It sounds too trivial. I frowned.
“Hey, maybe I’m wrong, and he sees things just as chill as you. If that’s the case, then it’s all good.”
“Hmm,” I muttered, miles away. I couldn’t get rid of his voice. It sounds too trivial.
“But if not, then…”
“Yeah. I understand.”
She looked relieved. “Please don’t mention our conversation here, okay? I mean, that I talked to you about all this. I don’t know how he’d take it.” She looked at me, and I nodded and mumbled something affirmative.
She smiled thankfully. For a few seconds we were both lost in thought. Then Laurie asked, “How are you doing anyway? You look a little beat.”
“I think I overdid it a bit today,” I admitted. “I lost so much time with that intestinal flu. And that’s put me under pressure. Not in a good way.”
“Is there a good way?”
It was just a cast-off statement, yet it really struck me.
“Can someone watch? You training, I mean. Is that allowed?” Seeing the surprised look on my face, she added, “I’d love to see you play sometime.”
“Of course. You can come by whenever you want.”
Laurie made an ambiguous gesture toward the house. “You think she’d mind?”
“After having invited you into her home and offering you something to drink?”
Laurie laughed at my overly impressed tone.
“I don’t think she’d have anything against it, but I can ask her beforehand, if you like.”
Once Laurie had gone, I reread the text Vince had sent me in the morning.
Hey! You busy tonight? I still owe you a sunset on the beach… ??
What if she was right? Maybe Vince really liked me. Maybe he was hoping for more? I looked into the distance. I replayed every one of our conversations. Every glance. Every gesture. Every touch. And then my fingers began to move.
Sorry. I can’t tonight.