60. Luke
Luke
Iknow being independent is important to Blake. I know she was hesitant to move in with me, and felt like a freeloader. That made my words feel even more harsh.
“Why did you end up leaving the apartment, Luke?” Bella asks.
I turn to Blake, deciding to continue talking to her instead of Bella.
“I knew you needed space, but over my dead body were you going to spend one night on someone’s couch.
You have been working so hard, and I am so proud of you.
You deserved to be at home, comfortable in your own bed.
I spend a lot of nights at the hospital, so it would have killed me knowing you were on some couch and the bed was empty. ”
She just smiles and grips my hand tighter. A slow burning wave of emotion builds within my chest, radiating through my body, and consumes me.
“B, fuck, I know this is not romantic and you deserve more than this moment, but you being here with me-it means more to me than you can imagine. I’m done mincing my words or waiting for the timing to be perfect.
I fucking love you, B. I always have. When I look at you, the rest of the world fades away.
The curve of your smile, the way your eyes crinkle around the edges when you laugh.
I’ve etched every detail about you into my memory.
I catalog everything you do and replay it repeatedly when we’re apart.
You are everything to me. Dammit-I’m sorry.
I should have made sure we were alone when I said this out loud for the first time.
” I run my hands over my face, disappointed with my timing.
“Luke, stop,” Blake says, pulling my hands away from my face.
“I love you so fucking much. You’re all I need.
However you show up, that’s what I need.
Bella is onto something. I have so much shit built up with my mom and guys I’ve dated and I react big when the situation isn’t that big to protect myself from being hurt.
Our fight was not big enough that one of us had to leave.
All I need is you, Luke, whatever it looks like for us, that’s what I need. ”
I just stare at her for a second, not knowing how to proceed. I take in my surroundings. An apologetic smile is all I can offer Bella. “I’m going to kiss her, ok?”
Before Bella can respond, my hands wrap around Blake’s jawline and I pull her into me.
Our lips meet in a slow soft kiss, opening slightly like pieces of a puzzle.
Placing my forehead against her, I pull away just enough to see her glossy eyes.
“B, I love you so much. I’m really sorry I ruined your opening day.
I promise I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you. ”
“I can’t wait to see what that’s like.” She bites her lower lip, a smile tugging at her mouth.
Her eyes soften, and for the first time in what feels like forever, the tension between us begins to ease.I don’t know what I expected her to say, but when she reaches for my hand, it’s enough. The apology, the forgiveness-everything feels like it’s finally starting to fall into place.