Chapter 31 Liam
Chapter Thirty-One
LIAM
“She’s gone.” The words hit me like a bucket of ice water over my head.
My stomach rolls, all the light inside me seeming to fade.
I can’t speak. I can’t breathe. My throat is like a pinhole, and I wheeze in a breath.
Allen looks at me. “Liam? Is everything okay?”
I need to tell the board I can’t finish the meeting. I need to tell the board I have a family emergency or something, but if I speak again I know my voice will crack.
I stand up abruptly, stalking out of the boardroom as they all start to murmur.
Let them talk. I’ll deal with this later.
I keep it together just long enough to make it to my office, lock the door, and pull the blinds. Then I throw my PC against the wall, the crunch and shatter of the monitor oddly satisfying. I upend my file cabinets, folders flying all around the room.
This is my safe space. My home. I’ve only ever felt comfortable here, never out there, never in my father’s world. And I’m destroying it because Isla betrayed us.
God, Isla.
Just thinking of her makes me stop.
My chest heaves, and my heart aches, my stomach rolling.
Isla’s really gone. She took off, likely while Dare was sleeping.
You stupid, naive asshole.
But I don’t know if I’m thinking it about Dare or myself.
I let myself believe…
It doesn’t matter. Whatever I felt before was crazy, obviously some kind of fluke. I was right all along.
She doesn’t want me. She doesn’t want any of us. She was just playing the game.
And I fucking fell for it. We all did.
A knock sounds on my door, and I jerk it open.
It’s Faye, my secretary, and she looks at me with wide eyes. “Mr. Hayes?”
“What?”
“Um… your office…” She gestures toward the destruction. “Is something wrong?”
“None of your business.” I speak through gritted teeth and although Faye is used to my mercurial moods, this is extreme. I know I’m being an asshole, but I can’t seem to help it.
“Sorry, sir.” She looks down at the ground. “I'll have the cleaners come and… try to salvage your office. I suppose you’ll be out the rest of the day?”
“Rest of the week.” My voice softens. “Thank you, Faye.”
She blinks up at me. She can probably count the number of times I’ve thanked her on one hand.
“You’re welcome, sir.” She scurries over to her desk, and I shut the office door just as Allen comes hurrying toward me.
“Liam, the board meeting, you have to—”
“Postpone it.”
“Postpone it?” Allen looks flabbergasted. “But the Reynolds deal is going through as we speak. We can’t postpo—”
“I said postpone it.” My tone leaves no room for discussion, and Allen goes silent.
I push past him, heading to my car, and haul ass to the cottage.
Dare’s car is gone. Of course.
When I walk into the house, Cillian is smoking a cigarette on the terrace, and Dare is sitting on the couch, staring into space.
“Thought he quit.”
Dare glances over at the glass door, seeing Cillian with smoke billowing around him, and he shrugs.
“He did. Guess he started back.”
“You fell asleep, didn’t you?”
Dare rolls his shoulders and stands up, facing me.
I tower over him even though he’s tall.
“Don’t fucking start with me, Liam.”
“Don’t start with you? You’ve undermined this whole operation—”
“What operation?” He huffs out a breath, puffing out his chest.
I’ll say this for Dare, he doesn’t back down from a fight, even if he knows he won’t win.
“You know just as well as I do there is no operation. Never was. She isn’t Maggie Sullivan.”
“She still knows too much.” I’m speaking around a rock in my throat and trying to ignore the devastation washing over me.
She’s gone. She never cared. She was lying to me when she said all those things, about how we were more alike than I thought.
“Oh, fuck you. What can she possibly know? That we’re gangsters? Everyone knows that, Liam, even your precious employees.”
I take a single step toward him. “Don’t.”
“What are you going to do about it?” Dare bounces on his heels, clearly ready for a fight, and I’m winding up to punch him when Cillian pushes us apart with his hands.
“Stop it.” His voice, usually soft, is now harsh and dangerous. “Stop pointing the finger at Dare, Liam. You fell asleep with her just the other night. We all let down our guard one time or another, just admit it.”
I take a deep breath that rattles in my chest. “You’re right.”
Cillian blinks at me but doesn’t speak. His eyes are bloodshot.
“I’ve already tracked the car.” Dare shows me the ping on his phone. “It's at the bus station. God knows where she is now.”
“We’ll find her. Do the research. Find out who Isla Quinn really is. We’re stupid for not doing it before.”
Cillian heads to the door. “I’ll head to the bus station, see if anyone will tell me anything.”
I nod. “Good. Dare, go with him. I’ll stay here, in case she gets spooked and comes back.”
Dare’s eyes light up with hope. “Do you think she will?”
God, he’s an idiot. He’s still hopeful, still thinks she wants us. But I can’t even bring myself to ridicule him.
I shrug instead, and Cillian walks out to the car.
Dare reluctantly follows, and suddenly, I’m alone in the house.
There are memories here, so many memories of me and Cill, me and my Da before he went off the rails.
But now everything’s replaced. Everything’s different.
The couch, where Isla and I cuddled. The kitchen, where she cooked for me after telling me she couldn’t. The bedroom, where we all took her as ours.
It’s not like I had dreams of marrying her or anything, but I thought...
I guess I thought maybe she really did start to trust me. I thought maybe she’d grown to even like me, because God knows I can’t lie to myself anymore.
Getting to know her was growing to love her, and that’s all there is to it. There was nothing I could do about it.
She’s bright and beautiful and funny, and it was inevitable. I thought we were inevitable. Some part of me wanted her to choose me, choose us.
I was foolish to think she wouldn’t betray us.
Why wouldn't she? I would have done the same thing in her shoes.
And I also would have given away all our secrets to her. And I know Dare and Cill would too. Maybe even did, some.
Which is why we have to find her.
No other reason.