Chapter 35
NADIA.
Iwas trying to take in all of Riley while he sang when a surge of emotions suddenly hit me and mixed with mine.
My eyes started to water as it finally dawned on me that he was sharing his emotions with me.
This was the first. And I hope it will be the first of many. We had never talked about walls and boundaries, but I always shared my deepest emotions with him so he could read everything about me. But he hadn’t, not until today.
And I felt his pain, his sorrow, and one thing that I was never familiar with—something that was giving me butterflies in my stomach. It let me know that I was important to him.
I slammed my face against the crook of his neck after he positioned me on his lap. I couldn’t fight the sobs escaping my throat. Too many emotions, too many feelings, but what stuck with me was his pain.
“I’m sorry if I disappointed you today. I didn’t know he would show up…”
“What are you talking about? I’m not disappointed with you.” His voice was so calm and sweet, nothing like the way he was talking at his office earlier.
“The money… You shouldn’t have given him anything…”
“Hey… Look at me.” He moved his hands to my arms and pulled me away from his neck as his eyes caught mine. “Don’t think about the money. We can earn it back. What is important is that he won’t come for you again.”
“If you’re not mad at me, then why did you leave me to come here?”
He took a deep breath as his eyes darted to my lips, his thumb brushing against them. “I was having a bad moment. I feared that you would leave me.”
“Why would you think that? Did you think I would go with Elliot? You must be insane to think I would want that monster over you.”
He gasped for air before he answered my question. “Everyone that was important to me left. And I don’t think I can handle it if you’re the one leaving me.”
“Riley…”
“I love you, Nadia. I wish I could make you stay with me for a long time..”
“I can stay forever, as long as you want me to stay.” A smile graced my lips as I cupped his cheeks, urging him to look at me. “I’m not Andrea. I won’t leave you. And if she did leave, maybe it was something more, and not because of you.”
“Caspian… Caspian is her fated mate.”
My heart jumped out of my chest. Now I finally know why she left Riley. There was nothing shocking about it. But I understood why it pained Riley, I just hoped I would be enough to fill the space she left.
“There’s nothing wrong with you then.”
His brows furrowed as confusion flitted in his eyes.
“If Caspian is her mate, then she did the right thing. I would leave everything and everyone for you, Riley. Because you’re my mate and you are meant for me.
And if you were not lying, I think you were already smitten by me when you first scented me.
It was just perfect that Andrea found her mate before I came, otherwise, maybe I wouldn’t have had a place here.
” I pressed a finger to his heart. “So the Goddess did play fair. But how I wish you had waited for me instead of having a chosen.”
“Nadia…”
I shook my head, smiling at him. “I didn’t mean it in a bad way. I just want you to know my truth. I know this mate bond is helping a lot for you to like me or love me, but I know a part of Andrea is still there. But I will work on it…”
He was holding his breath, just looking at me, and I couldn’t fathom his emotions again.
I trailed my fingers down his chest until I reached the part where his heart was. “Slowly, I will creep into your heart until I occupy all the space in there.”
Riley grabbed the hand on his chest and brought it to his lips, peppering it with kisses. “I think my heart is full of you already. If you keep pushing more, it will explode…”
I giggled and pressed my lips on his cheek, trailing it up to the edge of his ear before I whispered to him, “Then it will explode and disperse throughout your whole body… And then I can finally say I own you. All of you.”
“You do. Own all of me.” He raised a hand to the nape of my neck and coiled his fingers around my hair and tugged them, causing me to softly gasp as my lips parted from his ear and his mouth trailed down my neck, licking and nibbling it.
“And you, who owns you, Nadia?” He asked in a raspy voice that sent tingles between my legs.
“My sexy Alpha…” But as much as I wanted him now, we were not done with our conversation yet. “Wait…” I palmed his chest and pushed my body away.
He grunted but didn’t let me get away from his hold and started attacking my neck more aggressively.
“Riley…” I giggled as I tried to push him away. “Stop…”
“No…” He groaned. His lips were now on the crook of my neck, sucking and biting the mark he had created.
“I want to know about your mother…”
And that did it. His body stiffened as his grip on me tightened. I pulled away from him and captured his eyes. He was frowning.
“Hey…” I smiled at him as my thumbs ran over his eyebrows, trying to flatten the curve. “I just want to know what happened. I can tell you about mine too, if you like.”
“There’s really not much to tell. She left when I was a baby, so I knew nothing about her.”
“Did you bother to ask your father why she left?”
“For another man.”
“Are you angry that she left with another man, or that she left you?”
“It’s the same thing.”
“No, it is not.”
“Nadia, please...”
“Did you ask your father why she didn’t take you along with her?”
“I would probably just get in her way with her lover, so she disposed of me.”
“It’s so unfair that you were judging her without hearing her side.”
“Twenty-three years, Nadia. If she wanted me to hear her side, she could have done that within the last twenty-three years. But there was nothing.”
“Did you try looking for her?”
“No.”
“Can we look for her?”
“No.”
“I want to look for my father. But I don’t even have a name. My mother carried his name to her grave. So I will never know him. But you, you have a chance to get to know her. Maybe it will make you feel better if...”
He stood up abruptly, carrying me with him before he placed me on my feet and began walking towards a tree. When he reached the place, he leaned his palms on it and let out a deep breath. “Enough, Nadia. I’m done with her.”
RILEY.
“Enough, Nadia. I’m done with her.”
“I just thought it would be nice to meet her. Riley, I didn’t have a mother, and you too. Maybe if we can get to meet her, who knows, maybe we’ll both end up having a mother…”
“Fuck, Nadia! I said stop! Can we move on from this?”
I was starting to get annoyed with this topic already, and if she kept insisting, I would end up walking away from here, which was the last thing I wanted to do.
I know I should have told her about Andrea. That was my bigger problem, not my fucking mother.
I had a big opening already, but the moment she thought that it was only the mate bond that made Andrea leave me, I lost the courage to tell her the truth.
She thought I was the victim, the one left alone. And that she–my mate—was my saving grace. She was indeed my saving grace. But she had everything else wrong.
“It’s enough for today. Let’s return to the packhouse.” I turned around and started walking towards her.
“You’re not being fair.”
“I am. I don’t need a mother.”
“But I do want one.”
“Then maybe go and find another mate who can give you a mother-in-law because I fucking don’t have one and I don’t want to have one!” I snapped at her, and I regretted it the moment it flew out of my mouth.
I should really learn to filter my fucking mouth.
I brushed my palms over my face and let out a sigh of desperation.
“Nadia, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that. I’m just not ready for her.
I don’t want her to get in between us. But if you want a mother figure, I can introduce you to my aunt.
She’s the Luna of the Green Valley Pack, a wonderful female. I’m sure you will get along well.”
She was just looking at me, and I couldn’t feel any emotions coming from her. Did she block it off?
I stepped in closer to her, coiling an arm around her waist before pulling her closer to me. “Fine. We will talk about her, but not now. Or not tomorrow. Can you just give me time to enjoy this, what we have, and not be bothered by her or anyone else? Please, baby.”
She didn’t say anything and just nodded her head before her arms wrapped around my neck, pulling me closer for a hug.