Aria
Iblinked a few times, my eyes blurry, trying to focus, as I heard a quiet sound of bleeping. I slowly lifted my hand, noticing a cannula as my eyes narrowed on it to gain full focus. My eyes trailed from it to the tube attached, and I turned my head to see the IV bag.
A nurse was standing there, checking the machines. I tried to pull myself up, but a sharp, dragging pain filled my lower abdomen as I winced, sucking air in through my teeth.
“Don’t move, dear. You’re in the hospital. You had emergency surgery. Just try to stay still for now.” She smiled, squeezing my hand.
I couldn’t quite grasp what she was saying; my head felt foggy, blank, not able to remember a thing.
“I’ll let the doctors know you’re awake. They’ll come and explain everything to you properly.”
“I don’t understand.” My voice came out groggy.
She stopped what she was doing, squeezing my hand again. “I’ll go get them,” she said as she made her way out of the room.
Silence filled the room, the beeping distant as I looked around. Little flashes of being in the office with Caspian telling me I didn’t look so good ran through my head.
The door opened, and a doctor walked in. He came over to the bed, checked my ID badge on my wrist, then sat down in the chair next to me.
“Good morning, Aria. I’m Dr Hamilton. I was part of the team that operated on you. How are you feeling right now? Any pain? Are you feeling dizzy or nauseous?” he asked gently.
“Um, no.” I rubbed my arms. “Just cold, and my hands feel tingly. What happened?”
“That’s perfectly normal after a blood transfusion and a major operation. Your body’s temperature is trying to regulate itself.” His eyes flicked to the machine, then back to meet mine.
“You were brought in after collapsing at work. You lost a significant amount of blood internally. We took you in for emergency surgery, and we found that you had an ectopic pregnancy.” My hand naturally found my stomach, and he paused for a beat.
“That means the pregnancy implanted in your fallopian tube instead of your womb. There’s a higher risk of ectopic pregnancies when using the contraceptive implant, and unfortunately, that was the case here. ”
He paused again as my heart started to race, a sick feeling forming in my throat.
“The tube had ruptured, and you were losing blood quickly. We had to remove the damaged tube to control the bleeding and save your life,” he continued.
Sharp pain hit my stomach again as I curled my finger. “And the baby?” I asked, but I already knew.
He looked at me for what felt like a lifetime. “Ectopic pregnancies cannot be saved. I’m so sorry.”
I swallowed hard, my mind completely blank, trying to process what he was saying.
“You’re stable now, but you’ll need to rest. We’ve tried to contact your listed emergency contact, Sebastian Knight, but we haven’t been able to reach him yet.”
My heart dropped into the pit of my stomach. I needed him, and he wasn’t here.
The doctor rose from the chair.
“The nurses will be in to monitor you, and you’ll be kept in for a few days.”
“Thank you,” I said quietly.
“If you need to talk through anything, please let the nurses know, and I can come and see you.”
I forced a smile.
The nurse made her way back in, and the doctor made his exit.
“Nurse, I’m so sorry, but could you pass me my phone from the table, please?”
“Of course, dear.” She picked it up and handed it to me.
I scrolled, dialling Sebastian’s number, but as I put it to my ear, it cut out. I tried again, but it did the same. I brought up the messages.
Aria:
Where are you? I need you now.
I stared at the screen, praying for any kind of response, but there was nothing.
Who was I kidding? I hadn’t heard from or seen him for weeks. I didn’t know where he was or what he was doing. I know I’d told him I wanted space, but I thought he’d fight for us. How wrong was I? I was stupid to think he’d be here now when I needed him more than I ever had.
All I wanted was for him to come bursting through the door and wrap me up in his warmth and tell me everything would be ok. But he wasn’t going to. He’d promised he’d always be there for me.
He’d broken that promise.
“I’ll be back later to check on you,” the nurse said, then made her way out of the room.
I lay there, staring at the ceiling, thoughts circling through my mind.
Odd things about the baby, like what they would have looked like.
Whether they’d have had mine or Sebastian’s eyes.
Little bright blue eyes looking back at me.
If it would have been a boy or a girl. If they’d have liked butterflies the way I did.
Of course, they would have been taller than me, like Sebastian was.
Then the tears came flooding through like the raging middle of a thunderstorm.
Placing my hand over my mouth, I tried to cover the cries that swept through the cracks between my fingers. I took a deep breath, my body shaking as I tried to take in enough oxygen to fill my lungs.
I placed my hand on my stomach. “I’m so sorry,” I whispered through my sobs.