Chapter 36
The countryside rolled by the car window.
I was overly aware of Laurent beside me.
It hurt to have him so close and yet…so far.
His hand cupped my thigh, unwilling to let go.
I let him, just as I’d let him kiss me over the past few days.
Every time he tried to take things further, I used my voice to stop him in his tracks.
Each attempt at seduction had failed spectacularly.
And to think, he’d been so assured of his success.
I stood by what I said. I wanted an answer to the question I had posed. Could he try to love me, despite what he was? Was he willing to? Based on his reaction, he seemed eager to admit defeat, as if I wasn’t worth the attempt.
It should have hurt me, but it infuriated me. Part of that was my fault. I’d failed to heed Zola’s warning. I’d allowed my feelings to get involved, let myself fall for a man who was emotionally unavailable.
Supposedly.
He wanted me to think he was.
I knew better. Deep down, there was so much more to him than what he allowed others to see. He had shown me glimpses. Perhaps I understood him better than he realized. I saw the truth. He was afraid to disappoint me.
“There, you can see the turrets just over that hill.” Laurent leaned in and pointed. He’d been overly attentive since our argument three days ago. As if he might win me back in other ways.
“Oh,” I breathed, caught up by the sight. Turrets and then banners rose from the hillside as a castle took form, its dark gray walls foreboding. I half expected bats to grace the parapets. “That’s House Sarkas?”
It wasn’t a house. It was a fortress built for war, not comfort—though I suspected it had seen plenty of both over the centuries.
“Anoth Fortress,” Laurent confirmed. “It’s been a few years.”
“It’s…huge.”
He hummed. A moment later, Vittorio broke from the main road and tires crunched on gravel. I felt a burst of cold crawl over my skin. “What was that?” I whispered.
“The wards. Thousands of years ago my sire had a host of powerful witches at his beck and call. They warded the place against outsiders. Only those of our family can enter.”
“But I’m not family.”
“You are. You carry my blood. You will be safe here. There will be no surprise visits as there were in Braxton. No demon will cross the boundary or dare infringe upon Sarkas lands.”
That offered me a measure of comfort, especially given what had happened to Drazgus. I was still uneasy about the whole situation. It was all too convenient that the person who’d been hired to abduct me was now dead.
Anoth rose up around me. It looked positively medieval. Nothing like the gothic architecture I was used to. This looked like something that stood against the test of time. I was afraid to ask how old it truly was.
Vittorio took us across a moat and through an ancient portcullis into a giant courtyard. There he deposited us in front of a large staircase that presumably acted as the main entrance to Anoth. Because stairs were easier to defend.
Laurent wasted no time in helping me out and taking my hand.
He escorted me up the stairs and into a grand hall.
I blinked, taking everything in. Unlike the outside, the inside had been entirely made over.
While it contained hints of times long past, like tapestries and armor, it also had electric lighting, restored windows, and other comfortable amenities.
“Come, I’ll give you the grand tour,” Laurent drawled. Catina appeared from the shadows.
“No trouble, sire?”
“None. Thank you, Cat.”
I was pulled through room after room. Unlike modern architecture with hallways and convenient designs, this place was built with rooms leading to other rooms. You had to walk through a whole host of doorways just to reach the place you wanted to go.
Laurent explained that hallways were modern in their development.
The upper floors did have a few, though, after portions of the castle had been modified.
We passed numerous vampires along the way, far too many to count. All part of House Sarkas, gathered at their sire’s orders. They bowed or offered friendly greetings as we went. I saw very few familiar faces and far too many curious gazes.
“Here. This will be our apartments.”
My jaw dropped when Laurent closed a heavy door behind me.
We stood in a giant sitting room. Several doorways led to other rooms. A small dining room with a set of windows overlooked a beautiful garden that put Braxton’s grounds to shame.
There was a small, personal library that also doubled for a study.
The bedroom and bathroom were a joined suite, and I was relieved to see it had been fully upgraded with modern touches.
I ran my fingers along the plush leather sofa as I meandered about the main room, taking in each of its details.
Everything about this section of the castle was to Laurent’s taste.
It was just the right balance of comfort and elegance.
I almost expected to see his clothes scattered about, but then remembered he hadn’t been back here in some time.
Anoth had been his father’s seat of power.
He’d been eager to escape it. Reluctant to return.
I didn’t suppose this place held happy memories. Perhaps together, we might change that.
“You will be comfortable here?” Laurent turned to me, a touch of anxiety in his eyes.
“It’s perfect.” I offered a small smile. Despite his tour, I was eager to explore everything more slowly.
A gentle rap at the door was accompanied by a small bark.
“Enter,” Laurent called.
Hassan strolled in, Vittorio on his heels carrying Cinnamon’s crate. She pranced at Hassan’s side, but upon spotting me, raced over. I fell to my knees, taking her into my arms. She was getting too big to lift. So instead, I curled my body around hers and gave her snuggles.
“Where would you like this, sire?”
Laurent directed Vittorio on the placement of Cinna’s things while I gave her kisses on her soft ears and the top of her head.
“She has not yet seen the grounds,” Hassan informed me—a hint. “I thought I’d allow you that honor.”
The grounds were expansive; Cinna would be in heaven here.
I glanced up at Laurent. “Shall I take her for a walk—“
“I’ll join you.”
I swallowed. “All right.”
With Cinna at my heels, bobbing off to sniff whatever struck her curiosity, Laurent took me on a vast tour of Anoth’s grounds. He held my hand as we walked, stealing kisses whenever I allowed. I pretended as if things between us were fine.
The grounds at Anoth had much to offer. There were gardens, an entire greenhouse with exotic plants, a small lake Cinna decided to dunk herself in, and a beautiful stable with nearly two dozen horses.
It was Laurent’s offer to take me riding in the coming days that left me giddy as we returned to the castle’s interior with a sopping wet puppy.
Laurent took me by way of the kitchen where Vittorio was working beside Catina and several others I didn’t recognize.
Laurent assured me I’d learn everyone’s name in time.
Vittorio rushed forward with a towel to dry Cinna before she tracked water everywhere.
He cooed as he dried her and my heart melted a little.
I left her in his care, returning to our apartments.
Our things had been deposited in our absence.
Laurent pulled me into his arms. “I cannot stop thinking about devouring this mouth,” he growled.
My stomach swooped. It was impossible to ignore the way my core heated, the way my body tightened with need.
He followed his words with a deep kiss, exploring the recesses of my mouth. I kissed him back, letting my tongue slide over his. Our movements turned frenzied. My hands fisted in his hair, his reached for my breast squeezing before finding my ass. My hunger for him came roaring to the surface.
Laurent took this as an invitation. In a single blink, I was pressed against the wall. His leg slipped between mine, putting the most delicious pressure against my clit. I moaned, my lips parted, head falling back.
“I love that sound,” he murmured against my throat. His admission snapped me out of my haze. I didn’t stop kissing him, though. I allowed the moment between us to spiral, even if it felt a little petty.
“Let’s spend the afternoon in bed, tangled in each other. Let me please you, little flower. I want to taste you until you’re trembling.”
He nipped at the skin along my jaw. My breathing turned ragged. He pinched my nipple then hooked his other hand beneath my thigh, pulling it up around him. The angle was perfect. He fit more firmly against me.
My body screamed for his touch, every nerve ending alive with need. It was so tempting to forget my resolve. His fingers slipped beneath the hem of my shirt—
“Stop,” I commanded. My voice was my biggest ally in this fight.
Laurent was forced to freeze. For a couple of seconds, his hand remained motionless.
I saw the fight in his fathomless gaze, the way he struggled to shake off my command.
There was defiance there too, as if he thought he might overpower my command and keep going. Then he groaned in frustration.
“Have you made a decision?” I asked, pressing my point.
His expression wiped clean before he released me, backing up several paces. My heart squeezed painfully. “I’ve got a few matters that require my attention. I’ll be in my study.” He disappeared into the room adjacent to the sitting room, partly closing the door without latching it.
I glared at the ancient wood, glared at the man somewhere beyond. Why was he making this so difficult? Was the idea of loving me really so impossible, or was he just too afraid to try?
“Dinner will be within the hour.” Laurent’s voice pulled me from my work. I closed the lid of my laptop, tearing my focus away from a paper on fractional Fourier transforms. My head was spinning with formulas, but in the best way.