Chapter 36
Carson watched Allie walk away. Every word she had said struck like a thousand knives. He had done her an injustice. He’d thought by being silent, he was keeping her safe, but he had led her straight into the lion’s den unprepared.
She was the bravest, most fearless woman he had ever met, and he would never forget the image of coming across her in the woods with Yurgio hovering above her, ready to plunge a knife into her heart and snuff out her life.
The guys were right, and he needed to make things right with Allie.
No more excuses. No more waiting. He didn’t want to lose her again.
He didn’t want to live without her. And he had never come so close to losing himself.
He was done with secrets, done with half-truths; if she’d have him, he’d make it all up to her because he loved her, dammit.
She was more important than any mission.
More important than anything. She was the most important thing in the world to him.
“Allie, wait,” he called after her, but she didn’t stop. He jogged to catch up with her and pulled back on her arm to finally halt her.
“What?” she snapped.
“I don’t want to lose you.”
Her hard eyes wavered, and he saw a flash of vulnerability. He hadn’t completely lost her. He had hurt her, but he could still fix this. “It’s too late.”
“No,” he refuted, shaking his head. “It’s never too late.
” If she wanted to know who he was, then he would tell her everything.
“My name is Carson Payton Townsend. I grew up in Connecticut with two older brothers. I joined the Navy when I was eighteen and the SEALs when I was twenty-four. Four years ago, I was in a Humvee that was struck by an IED. I was in the front passenger seat. The blast killed everyone but me. I was burned on the entire right side of my body. The door crushed me, and it was hours before paramedics could get to us. By then, my arm had become virtually lame. Special guns have to be made so I can hold them with my right hand. I don’t have full range of motion with it.
“It is my greatest shame that I bear. It’s a stark reminder of all that I lost that day.
Not only my career, but my teammates and friends.
My ex, Jenny, came to the hospital while I was healing and called me a monster, adding insult to injury.
I’ve hidden myself from everyone since then.
” He took a step closer to her, tears glistening in her eyes. “Until you.”
He continued, “You don’t look at me like a monster.
You don’t think less of me for my scars.
” Allie shook her head. Her eyes watering from unshed tears.
“After I was discharged from the Navy, I felt lost and alone. Then a Colonel came and offered me a solution. Be part of a team again, doing covert ops even most military personnel don’t know about.
Our team is all military discharged vets from different branches who still have a lot to offer their country but are not considered active duty.
Two weeks ago, we were on assignment to capture Yurgio and his brother Jurgen.
Before that could happen, they escaped. Jurgen was killed, and Yurgio got away. ”
“He blamed you. Called it murder.”
Carson shook his head. “I did kill him, but it wasn’t my intention. We fought, and it happened. It was an accident. That’s everything. The whole truth. Well, one other thing. I love you, Allie. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. If you’ll have me.”
Allie gasped when he said ‘I love you.’ He hadn’t intended to just blurt it out, but it was the truth. He loved her. There was no point in denying it or calling it something else. It was pure love. And he was tired of fighting it or making excuses.
“Carson, I—” Allie hesitated, looking around like she was searching for an escape. “I appreciate the truth. I’m glad to finally know, but it doesn’t change things between us.”
He knew what was holding her back. That one final barrier. Carson shrugged his gun over his shoulder and dropped it on the ground. He unzipped his vest and let that fall too.
“What are you doing?” Allie asked, her eyes widening in confusion as he started stripping.
Carson didn’t answer her. She’d see in a moment.
He pulled his long-sleeved shirt over his head, followed by his undershirt, leaving himself bare from the waist up.
He held his hands out to the side and spun around for her inspection.
He let her see their matching tattoos. His was larger, but it was the exact same. Blue eyes and all.
It was as if they were meant to be. He didn’t even remember why he’d chose blue eyes on the phoenix. It was as if he’d known he’d be swept away one day by a blue-eyed flame-haired woman.
Carson turned to face her, grabbing her hand and placing it on his right pectoral. “No more hiding. This is all me.”
Allie stared at his chest, then her gaze moved around to his shoulder and arm. He released her hand as she felt over his scars, her thumb caressing the rough skin. There was no disgust on her face. No gasp of horror.
He shuddered under her touch and closed his eyes, giving her his complete trust. Her hand moved and settled over his heart. “I love you, Carson.”
His eyes popped open, and he saw all the love radiating from her blue depths.
He closed the distance between them and kissed her.
He thrust his tongue in deep, and she opened eagerly for him.
He poured everything he had into the kiss.
Showing her how much he loved her without words.
Her hands glided up and down his arms. There was nothing left between them.
All his secrets were out. He finally pulled back and kissed her on her forehead before stepping away from temptation.
“As much as I would like to continue this, we need to get the house cleaned up and Yurgio to the police. Sandy is probably worried sick about you.”
“Sandy,” Allie gasped. “Oh my God, she must have been frantic when I didn’t show up at work.”
“Well, you can assure her here in a moment.” He picked up his clothes and weapons and put everything back on.
“What do you mean in a moment? She’s here? Carson?” she screeched, looking angry that he would bring her friend here. Not like Sandy had given any of them a choice.
“She insisted. She was told to wait in the car for us with instructions to call the police in an hour if we didn’t come out with you. By now, I’m sure Jack or someone has assured her all is well, but she probably won’t believe them until she sees you with her own eyes.”
“Well, what are we waiting for?” Allie hurried through the woods; Carson kept pace beside her. “I can’t believe you brought her.”
Carson snorted. “You try stopping her from doing anything.”
It was a tearful reunion when Sandy and Allie came together.
Allie scolded Sandy for coming along, and Sandy scolded her for getting herself kidnapped as if Allie had planned it.
Given the situation, Carson explained to Sandy what he’d done and how Allie had ended up being kidnapped, which had earned him his own scolding.
Yurgio and his guard were apprehended. They’d called a cleanup crew to dispose of the bodies and get Yurgio to the proper authorities. They covered up Juan Gomez and his family’s murder by calling it a car accident. No one questioned it.
“I want to go home now.” Luke and Gary had to ride back with them since they’d rode together and their cars were parked at her house.
Allie went inside as Carson spoke to Luke.
“Let us know if you need anything. What she went through was pretty traumatic. Shay would be more than happy to speak with her.”
“Thanks, I’ll tell her that.” With that said, the guys left, and Carson went into the house.