Chapter 2
Chapter Two
Kace
Words can't describe how much I hate being laid up like this.
I hate the pain meds and the way they make me feel.
I hate the fact I can't get out of this bed without help and am forced to endure sponge-baths and urine bottles.
But more than anything, I hate the fact that when the girls think I'm not paying attention, I see the looks they exchange.
It's mostly Dani looking to Madi for reassurance, and I'm thankful my niece has enough sense and kindness to smile or wink or make a funny face whenever my baby girl seems freaked out by my injuries.
But I see the fear on both their faces, and I hate that I'm the cause. "You okay, kiddo? Do you have any questions for me?"
Dani blinks up at me all wide-eyed, and I melt. She had me wrapped around her finger before she ever made it into this world, and nearly seven years later? I'd dance on my head if I had to in order to get her to smile.
And right now, there's no smile in sight.
"Are you really okay, Daddy?"
"I'm really okay." It was touch and go there for a while on the operating table when the docs were trying to set my leg and treat the burns. But I'm on the other side of that now, barring infection.
"You don't look okay."
"I don't?"
Dani shook her head so hard her ponytail whipped side to side. "You look like a ghost with a red face."
Okay then. Note to self: never ask a kid to be blunt. There's no need. "Well, how about I tell you why I look like this so you understand it?"
"Okay. Why?"
I lift my hand and tug at her hair. "I lost some blood when I broke my leg. That makes me look pale. The redness is because of heat scald from the fire when my respirator got knocked off in the fall. But the redness will go away soon, and I'll be back to normal."
"Then you'll get to come home?"
I motion for her to climb up beside me on the bed.
"Come 'ere. Snuggle up with me," I say, patting the mattress beside me on my good side.
My right leg hangs by a strap rigged off the bed and throbs with every heartbeat, but my left shoulder, arm, neck, and back took the brunt of the burns.
I didn't require skin grafts, but getting the burns cleaned and taken care of makes a man seek God with every breath when he's not cursing the pain the meds can't touch.
"I'm afraid I can't come home for a while, baby. "
"But I want you to. I asked Mommy if I could stay with her, but she says she has to work, and no one can watch me. You've gotta come home."
I grind my teeth. Maybe if I didn't know my ex had lost her last job due to sexual misconduct in the workplace, I'd be a little more tolerant of her excuse.
But I did know. I also know the only thing she's working is the pool at her rich boyfriend's oceanfront home in the Caribbean.
She doesn't want to give up her summer vacation fling to be with her kid.
"I will. Soon. Until then, you get to spend more time with Pierce and the guys.
Uncle Gabe says he and Bronwyn are taking you to play putt-putt sometime soon too. "
Dani's chin wobbles with the onslaught of tears, and I use my arm to pull her close and kiss the top of her head. "Come on, now. Don't be crying because you miss my smelly socks and burps."
I get a giggle out of her and smile at the sound, though the pain is beginning to really make itself known. I glance at the clock and know I have some time to go before I can get another dose. "Mads, how do you like working at the bookstore?" I ask, deciding a change in topic is needed.
"I like it. Bronwyn's nice."
And that is the end of that conversation.
When my sister dumped Madison on me a few months ago, I don't know which one of us was more shook.
I mean, Dani is mine, and I've had nearly seven years to adjust to being her dad.
But I'm in no way prepared to handle a teenager, much less one abandoned by her mother.
We haven't heard from my sister since she walked out to get something from her car and wound up peeling out like a NASCAR driver. But here we are. "Thanks for helping out so much with Dani. I really appreciate it."
Madison-Madi-Mads acknowledges my words with a nod and a careless shrug. We still tiptoe around each other more often than not. I get the sense that she's afraid to get attached, but who can blame her? The poor kid has had her world upended in more ways than one.
"Daddy?"
"Yeah, baby?"
"I'm scared."
"What are you scared of?"
"I don't want you to die. Ever."
I freeze, gut-punched by the words Dani just uttered. I curse the fact I can't wrap her up in my arms the way I want to, so I make due with one and rub a hand up and down her little back, trying to soothe the fear as best I can. "You don't need to worry about that."
"But…you almost died."
"I'm right here."
"You're not home. And Mommy can't watch me."
I squeeze my eyes shut and silently curse the woman who made her daughter feel unwanted. "Hey, listen up, okay? You don't ever have to worry about someone taking care of you. You hear me? I'm right here, but if I wasn't, you've got more uncles and aunts than any kid I know."
"You mean Uncle Gabe?" she asks.
"Yeah, and Pierce and Sully. All of the guys on the crew.
You've been their girl since the day you were born.
And they've taken care of you while I've been in here, haven't they?
" I feel her little chin dig into my chest when she nods.
"So see? You've got lots and lots of people to watch out for you and make sure you're okay. You have nothing to worry about."
"But I want you."
"You've got me, baby. Just give me some time to heal up, and I'll be home. Promise."
Dani scrambles to sit up against my side, and I hold back a pained curse when she jostles me a little too much.
"Guess what?" she asks.
"What?" I sense a change in topic given her expression, and my heart tugs a little more. I love that she can bounce back so fast.
"Bronwyn says when I get big, I can work at the bookstore too."
"What?" I play up my surprise. "Doesn't she know you'll just have tea parties and drink all the hot chocolate?"
"Daddy!" Dani looks insulted. "That's because I'm little. When I'm big, I won't do that stuff."
I wink at her and glance at the clock again, fighting back a grimace as the pain from the burns and my broken leg steadily increases. "Well, I happen to like our tea parties. I hope that means you won't get big then."
Dani's giggles fill the air. "Daddy!"
I glance across the room to find Mads glaring into space and looking as surly and sullen as a teenager gets.
Dani still trusts me. Madi doesn't trust anyone. And if I don't figure out a plan soon, this house is going to get a lot harder to hold together.