33. The Journey, The Destination
Chapter thirty-three
The Journey, The Destination
I f you’re still reading, bless your heart. You’ve taken a long journey with Edie and me; this is her kiss and tell story that we never thought we’d write. We’ve written about her significant romances, affairs, love stories, sexy encounters, or whatever label we might put on them. You know by now we’re old. It’s been twenty-six years since Edie took that trip to lie in Laurie’s arms in the beautiful land of Nova Scotia. (I hope you gasped!) Life goes quickly so we have to tell these stories before time runs out. We learned a lot through these many romantic journeys. As her friend, observing Edie was, many times, all the proof I needed to stay in my lane. However, I realize I could have taken more chances, and been more daring as I sit alone now eating my TV dinner. That hit home when Edie asked me to add that to the story. (The little shit.)
Reliving her “adventures” caused her to reflect and analyze her actions in many cases. There probably aren’t any astounding revelations but Edie and I hope you enjoyed coming along with us. A friend who read these stories asked, “How many of these men broke your heart, Edie?”
Without hesitation, she answered, “All of them, some when they left, some when they stayed, some when they died, some when they walked away, some when I walked away, and some when we said our mutual goodbyes. The beautiful part of it was I cared enough to experience pleasure, some deep, some simple. I experienced love of all kinds from many men who I hope enjoyed me as much as I enjoyed them. Yes, love hurts, but love heals, love gives and restores and love fills gaps and holes that are deep and dark. Love can be stimulating, fascinating, aggravating, cussing up a storm maddening, tender, and full of comfort. Love, in all its many stages, leads us down different paths, through different dreams of hope, but no matter the outcome, there is usually something of value we can take away from the experience.”
There may be a few short-lived flings that could be recalled but Edie wanted to talk about one, (feel free to substitute that fling word). Todd was the soon-to-be ex-husband of an acquaintance of hers. He came to her house in deep despair and grief after discovering his wife had been having an affair with a local hunk and had filed for divorce. He was suffering so badly he didn’t know if he could endure it. He was one of the good guys; hard-working, good provider, loyal, great dad, and he had been used and abused. Edie tried everything to soothe his broken heart understanding the importance of talking things out, but when nothing worked and he insisted he was a “loser” she invited him into her bed. She assured him he had lots of “potential” and after a few special “treatments”, he moved on to a new phase of his life. Glad she could help. Who knew Edie was such a good therapist?
Before we started writing these silly love stories, we made a list of men we would include. We thought there were many more but that could be because of the intimacy and repeat performances she shared with several of them. The number is embarrassing but we hope you promised not to judge. As you know, Edie loves having a man in her life; she has never knowingly slept with a married man except for Andrew after their divorce, and more often than not, she loved each of them in some unique way. How long does it take to fall in love? That’s like getting sucked down a rabbit hole, spinning, twisting, twirling out of control if only for a short time. Many times, while recalling these stories to write the details, beads of sweat formed on her brow reliving the memories, many she wouldn’t share. Edie wanted this to be fun, realistic, and unoffensive, not erotic.
She falls in and out of love quite easily depending on his “skills” and certainly how attentive he is to her needs. Falling in love is more about initial attraction, flirting, charisma, passion, and skillful kissing that leads our thoughts to more intimate actions. If he’s good at those intimate actions and making dinner reservations, she’s all in.
Loving is what is left after that fling and fire in your belly has quieted. If you’re still with that man who invited you to share his heart, is a good cuddler, and demands nothing you’re uncomfortable with, you now know love. Few things last forever so if it doesn’t, move on. Enjoy the sweet times, savor them like a great cup of coffee. Some ladies never have that chance. Wondering how long it takes to fall in love will remain a mystery to Edie who can’t come up with an answer but she admits she can fall in love with a puppy or newborn baby in an instant. Falling in love is lovely, exciting, and thrilling but loving is comfort and calm, lasting and luscious. Besides, what’s love got to do with it?
So what has Edie been doing for the last twenty-six years? She met a man. Would you have guessed that? He’s not the kind of man she would have ordered at Build-a-Bear. She enjoys a man who is articulate, who dresses in a classy way, who loves to read, and who puts few constraints on her. Her man is nearly the total opposite. They rarely enjoy the same things; he’s opinionated and doesn’t care if anyone agrees with him. He’s not a reader, lives with a 1950’s mindset, and she’s only seen him in anything but blue jean shorts a few times in these many years. They are superficial things that she should have been mature enough to overlook but she didn’t in the beginning. She won’t share a lot of their relationship here because it’s too special, too personal, and too wonderful.
What she will say is this man is as true-blue as any man who’s ever walked the earth. Every breath he breathes is to adore her, protect her, comfort her, look after her, defend her, take care of her every need, and put her first in every situation. There is no fault in that, only praise and love. After working for thirty years and retiring with a full pension at fifty, he hung up his hard hat and moved to Florida to be with her despite missing his grown family. He never gave a second thought to putting on a nail apron and firing up his drill to help her in her interior design business.
He anticipated everything that needed to be done and she couldn’t have hired five men to do the work he did. He’s ‘Mr. Worse-Case-Scenario’ which means she never has to be worried about being prepared for any impending disaster or minor catastrophe. He’s a great 50-50 partner that is loving and capable in any situation. He accepted her family without question and willingly shared his wonderful family with her as if she had always been part of them.
He’s not the man who tells her how beautiful she is and then flirts with the other women at the party. He’s the man who tells her how beautiful she is after breast surgery for cancer. He’s the man who said, “Honey, trying to replace you would be like trying to fill the Grand Canyon with a teaspoon.” He has never deliberately hurt her or given her cause for worry. He would give her the world if she told him what that meant to her. There is nothing he wouldn’t do for her if it was possible. They could travel the world if that’s what she wanted to do although he has no desire for travel. This man is not demanding or critical of her opinions even when they don’t agree. He has never pointed an accusatory finger at her about her previous life. He accepted her as she was at the moment they met.
She never knew there was a man like him. He’s a gift. They’ve had a few bumps here and there but nothing they would consider to threaten their relationship. Those potholes have allowed them to learn more about each other than if the road had always been smooth. He had been hurt before Edie came into his life and she discovered he was smart and learned from mistakes in his long previous marriage. Most men are more ego than heart and can’t admit they could have given more to the relationship. He’s not that man. He’s not a pushover in any sense of the word, but he listens and hears and cares. He promised her years ago they would sit on the porch and crack pecans with their gums when they got old. They’re almost there.
Yep. They’re that little silver-haired old couple that people watch hobble into the restaurant and hold the door for. They probably think they’ve been married fifty years, live in a tiny house with a white picket fence, and have a dozen kids. Truth be known…they’re human like everyone, well maybe more human than most; they continue to enjoy an occasional roll in the hay, (if you’re young and don’t understand that, ask your grandmother) and if you believe in the sanctity of marriage, I hope it’s common law marriage. At the beginning of this story of lovers, I told you a girl has to kiss a few frogs to find her prince. Who knew that was real? Sometimes taking a risk is worth it.
Edie will end by first feeling a bit guilty, especially if any of their families read this but with a tiny smirk building at the corners of her mouth, when she mentioned her guilt to a very French girlfriend, she said in her beautiful accent, “Oh, you Americans. Be like the French… it’s just sex!”
The End