Chapter 10 #4
Before he had time to answer, I disconnected the call and handed the phone to Paolo.
I looked at him and Francesco, and they both looked shocked.
They both look at me, probably not knowing what to say.
“So that’s it, let’s say goodbye here. It’s been a pleasure having you as my protectors and maybe even friends; thank you for your service!
” I feel my eyes fill with water and I don’t know if it’s because of the farewell, or because of the end of the engagement, contrary to what I thought, when I finished it I didn’t feel the relief I thought I would feel, instead I felt a heaviness in my stomach and heart, a discomfort, a kind of pain that I can’t explain.
I look at them standing in front of me and saying nothing without really thinking about what I’m doing.
I approach them and hug them both at the same time; they still look petrified but quickly regain their senses and hug me back. “Thank you for everything!”
As soon as I close the door to my apartment, I let out a sob that seems to have been stuck in my throat for a long time. Tears come out, and I don’t understand why I’m crying. Quick footsteps come toward me.
“What happened?” Leticia asks, trying to wipe away the tears that are streaming down my face.
“The engagement is over; I’ve broken it off.” My speech is interrupted by sobs that insist on coming out, along with the tears. They both stay silent for a while, and I don’t know what to think.
“Why?”
“I’m tired of them controlling my life. It’s always been like this, but before, at least those who did it felt more than contempt for me.”
I feel Aurora hug me; Leticia holds my hand and squeezes it lightly. “Maybe that’s for the best; maybe you’ll find love!” Without knowing why, Aurora’s words make me cry even more.
“I don’t know why I’m like this; it’s ridiculous…”
“You like him, Chiara!” I look at Leticia, trying to process her words. I don’t know when it happened or why. I don’t know how you didn’t realize it, but that cry, that pain on your face, shows that you’re in love with him!
I feel Aurora’s embrace tighten, I feel tears on my head, and I know she’s crying for me. Letícia looks at me with her eyes full of water and hugs me from the other side. We sat hugging on the living room floor for what seemed like hours.
Aurora releases me from her arms and kneels in front of me.
“You’re going to take a shower, we’re going to prepare your clothes, and You’ll look wonderful for your date with Henry; you’re going to give yourself a chance, and if when you arrive, you want to cry, our arms will be open for you.
But for now, you need to at least try to move on. ”
I still feel tears running; when I get in the shower, my tears come down with the water, and I want to scream for feeling something for someone I hardly know, for someone who clearly doesn’t reciprocate the feeling.
I wrap myself in the towel and look at myself in the mirror; my face is red and a little swollen. I walk into the bedroom and see a short, vibrant pink dress on the bed.
“Pink?”
Aurora looks at me with her hand on my waist and a condescending look on her face. “Don’t tell me you wanted to wear black.” Before I had time to nod, Aurora added. “We’re trying to add color to your life, not take it away!”
“Black is classic!”
“I still don’t care; it’s going to be pink!”
Still a little unsure of their choice, I put it on. The dress hugs my upper body and widens with a small rise at the waist. My back is bare, and a small bow decorates the backof the cut, giving a contrast to the closed neckline.
“Valentino knows what he’s doing!” I laughed at Leticia’s comment.
“He knew it all along.” I pull my pink tights down my legs and put on some high heels in the same color.
“You look like Barbie, with your pink clothes and blonde hair!” I look at Leticia, a little unsure. “In a good way, of course; Barbie is super cute!”
Half an hour later, my hair is full of waves and simple make-up has hidden my crying face. I look in the mirror and although I feel beautiful, something seems to be missing. I awake from my thoughts with a message from Henry telling me he’s arrived.
I leave the house and get into the elevator, wondering if I should really go to this date, I wave to the doorman. I look around, trying to find Henry.
“Hey Chiara, over here!” I look in the voice’s direction and see him inside a Mercedes G Wagon; I walk up to the car in swift steps, still reflecting on the encounter. I open the car door, and Henry offers me a radiant smile, making me smile back. “You look beautiful!”
“Thank you!” I say quietly, unable to face him.
“I was thinking about Thai food; what do you think?”
I look at Henry, and he seems really focused on the road.
I notice his dark blond hair, fair skin, and green eyes; he’s handsome.
A beauty softer than Luca. Henry looks away from the road and stares at me, waiting for an answer.
“That sounds great!” His gaze quickly returns to the road; he seems relaxed and comfortable with me by his side, even though he doesn’t really know me.
Then I remember that not all boys walk around fully armed and looking in their mirrors to make sure they’re not being followed.
I don’t realize how long it took us to get to the restaurant, but it seemed quick.
Henry runs to my side and opens the car door for me.
I smile and say thanks, and Ifollow him into the restaurant.
Henry pulls out a chair for me to sit on and sits down opposite me.
We place our orders, and the waiter quickly leaves.
“So tell me about yourself?”
I look at Henry without really knowing what to say. I’ve never been good at making conversation with people I don’t know well; I never really know what to say. “What do you want to know?”
“Everything, but let’s start with the basics, shall we, siblings?”
“Yes, two older brothers, Lorenzo and Vincenzo!” I sip my Thai iced tea, and then I realize that maybe I should ask something; I want to beat myself up for my laziness. “Do you have any siblings?”
“A younger sistercalled Mindy; she’s six years old!”
“It must be incredible to have a younger sister.”
“Yes, but perhaps not as much as you think; the age difference is big.” I nod and smile, not really knowing what to say. “What’s your plan for the future? I mean, what do you want to do after finishing college?”
I look at Henry and think that three hours ago, I would have been sure that I would get married, but now I’m not sure.
I have my dreams and goals, but my life doesn’t seem as full of certainties as before.
“I’m still not sure. Obviously, it will be something to do with fashion, but I still don’t know the right path.
My grandmother has a jewelry company, she’s the main designer.
I love designing jewelry, but I think maybe I should build something myself, so I don’t know. ”
“Carrying on the family business isn’t always a bad thing; you just have to earn your place and prove you can do it. My father works in the Supreme Court, and that’s my dream; I don’t think that following in the footsteps of someone in your family invalidates your worth!”
“Yes, maybe you’re right. I’m just not as sure as you are!”
“I don’t think anyone is, to be honest, at least not the people around me.
” Henry scratches the back of his head, looking a little embarrassed.
“Ever since I was little, I’ve wanted to be a judge; watching my father put bad people in jail showed me that just like him, I want to do my part for this world, to do some good, make a difference. ”
I hold back the dry laugh that threatens to escape my throat at the irony of my fate: I’ve broken off my engagement with the future Capo of one of the world’s most dangerous and lethal mafias, and hours later, I’m on the other side of the table, meeting a man who would probably give anything to condemn him, to rid the world of the evil he so idealizes. It’s a noble dream!
“I think so! You mentioned your grandparents’ profession, but what about your parents? Aren’t you thinking of following in their footsteps?”
“I don’t think it’s something that suits me.”
“Why not?” Henry seems genuinely curious, which makes me give a little smile of satisfaction at his interest in me; in a twisted way, his interest makes me feel good about myself.
“My mother is an entrepreneur, CEO of a chain of hotels and stores, inherited from my grandfather. My fatheris theCEO of several companies, but the main one is weapons. I don’t think I’d do well in any of those companies.”
“Weapons?”
I let out a laugh at his astonishment and wonder if he isn’t judging the family business. “Yes, all kinds of weapons, including battle tanks.”
“You are one of the families profiting from the wars.”
As soon as the words come out of his mouth, I feel my blood boil.
“You could say that, yes, we are the kind of family that supplies weapons to the government so that it can protect its people, that makes the weapons for the policemen who walk the streets! We can profit from wars, but don’t be fooled, Henry; we don’t start them, and we don’t force anyone to pull the trigger! ”
“I didn’t mean it like that… I…”
“No problem. Many people are judgmental about it, but they forget that when they need to defend themselves, weapons are often necessary.”
“Can you shoot?”
I face him without really being able to read his feelings about the question; I shrug and decide not to lie. I’m not going to change who I am for anyone; I don’t owe them that. “Yes, my grandfather taught me!”
“That’s wow… I mean, looking at you, I wouldn’t say you know how to use a gun.”
“Appearances can be deceiving.”
“I think so. I’ve never been in favor of guns, you know, because of the crimes committed with them.”