Chapter 11 #4
Maxi smiled awkwardly. Recalling the open hostility on Ursuline’s face, she found Ruth’s words hard to believe.
Ruth smiled ruefully. “You might think it unbelievable, my lady, but Sir Ursuline is not a bad person. He may be demanding, but he’s a steadfast knight who has always been loyal to Sir Riftan.
In fact, no other knight follows Sir Riftan so blindly.
But ever since the incident, he’s voiced his objections every chance he gets. ”
“I-Incident?”
The sorcerer hesitated, remaining quiet for a long time. When he finally spoke, his voice was resigned. “When Sir Riftan refused Princess Agnes’s hand in marriage.”
That name, uttered so unexpectedly, made Maxi’s spine stiffen.
Ruth studied her expression, then added flatly, “Sir Ursuline Ricaydo is from a prominent noble house. He has frequented Drachium Palace since he was a child, so he’s well acquainted with the royal family.
He shows more fealty to them than any other knight in the order, and the day he was knighted he even swore a geas to Princess Agnes. ”
A geas was the highest pledge of devotion, deference, and adoration that a knight could make, and it could only be sworn once in his lifetime. If Sir Ursuline had pledged his geas to Princess Agnes, then his enmity toward Maxi was understandable. Maxi wilted.
“D-Did he wish for R-Riftan to marry P-Princess Agnes?”
“Frankly, yes,” Ruth said. “If I am honest—and I only say this because it’s all in the past now—everyone in the order hoped Sir Riftan would marry the princess.
Not only were they a great team in combat, but they were widely considered a good match.
Everyone thought their engagement was an unspoken truth.
You can imagine our surprise when he turned down the marriage offer…
.” Ruth trailed off, watching her reaction.
Maxi wanted to feign indifference, but she could not stop her discomfort from showing on her face.
Ruth cleared his throat. “Apologies, my lady. It seems I’ve said too much.
But there is a reason for Sir Ursuline’s hostility—the commander he swore fealty to spurned the woman he pledged a geas to, and then married the daughter of the man he most despises.
Considering that, Sir Ursuline’s behavior is not so surprising. ”
“I-I see…” Maxi nodded somberly. The possibility that Riftan would have been better off marrying the princess was a fear that weighed heavily on Maxi’s mind. Hearing Ruth confirm that fear made her heart sink.
By marrying Maxi, Riftan had earned the ire of the royal family and the animosity of his men all at once. Distraught, she stared at the edge of the desk, searching for courage.
“D-Do you think…th-this could cause a rift among the knights?” she asked.
“You have nothing to worry about there, my lady,” Ruth said. “The bond the Remdragon Knights share is stronger than you think and, excepting Sir Ursuline, they don’t hold any ill will toward you.”
Feeling slightly reassured, Maxi nodded again. Ruth always spoke his mind, so she was sure he was telling the truth now.
“Still,” Ruth added thoughtfully, “it would be a great help if you could placate Sir Riftan, my lady. This bleak atmosphere is not doing anybody any good.”
“I-I shall try,” Maxi said, her tone doubtful.
Ruth sighed heavily, as if understanding what an impossible task placating Riftan was.
Maxi’s mouth went dry as she recalled the reason she had come running to the library. She swallowed hard and managed to speak, though her lips seemed glued shut.
“Um…O-on a-another matter…”
Ruth looked at her expectantly. Maxi avoided his gaze and rifled absently through the books on the table. Her heart pounded dizzyingly as she prepared to dredge up the most shameful part of herself.
“I-I w-w-w…was j-just c-curious…”
Ruth furrowed his brow, confused by her sudden hesitation. “What is it, my lady?”
Maxi mustered her courage. “D-Do you think y-you could…f-fix me…w-w…w-with your m-magic?”
“Fix you?” Ruth blinked, not understanding until Maxi’s face flushed red. He sighed. “My lady, magic cannot heal inherent disabilities.”
It was a truth Maxi already knew. If her impediment could be cured by magic, her father would have taken care of it long ago. But in her recent magical studies, she learned of great sorcerers who could create new spells and had begun to nurse a secret hope that Ruth might be such a sorcerer.
Her cheeks blazed, but she refused to let this small hope sputter out. “I-I am a-aware of that b-but…a-are you not c-capable of c-creating new spells? I-If you could f-find a way…”
“Finding a solution might be possible with enough research—there are many mages currently researching new runes to treat afflictions like blindness, deafness, and crippled limbs—but none have been proven effective yet. Even if I were to focus all my efforts on a cure, it would take decades.”
“I-I see…”
Maxi wanted to conceal her disappointment, but her shoulders slumped reflexively. Attempting to keep some semblance of composure, she began to smooth down her frazzled hair.
“I-I thought as much,” she said. “I-I only a-asked…t-to be sure.”
An awkward silence stretched between them once again. Maxi shifted uncomfortably, then slowly rose from her seat.
“W-Well then…I-I shall t-take my leave. R-Riftan said he would be b-back soon.”
“M-My lady, wait—” Ruth stood abruptly.
Maxi stared, surprised to see the sorcerer flustered.
He cleared his throat and murmured in a deflated voice. “Ending our conversation here makes it feel as if I have done you a great wrong.”
“Th-That wasn’t my intention.”
“Please, sit. Why don’t we mull it over together?”
Maxi glanced about the room, seeking an excuse to flee, but Ruth’s insistent tone rooted her to the spot. She sank back down into her chair. The mage seemed at a loss for words. He crossed his arms and stared up at the ceiling in silence.
“Have you tried overcoming the impediment yourself?”
Maxi glared at him, shocked by his insensitive question. “D-Do you think I-I speak like this b-because I wish to?”
She had endured lashings that ended in torn and bleeding skin, all in the name of correcting an impediment that grew only worse over the years. Maxi’s face flushed as she recalled the shame and humiliation, as if Ruth might be able to see her memories.
“No offense intended, my lady,” Ruth said, his hands held up in a warding gesture. “I only ask because articulation and speech may be improved through training.”
“I-I have had s-speech training e-ever since I was a-a child! B-But it proved f-futile.”
“What kind of training?”
Maxi hated the memory—reading aloud in front of her father and receiving a lashing for every stutter. She offered Ruth only a sliver of that truth.
“I-I recited poems o-or read scriptures a-aloud…o-or Roemian literature.”
“Heavens, you practiced with archaic languages while struggling with day-to-day conversations?”
Maxi looked away from him, wishing she had not brought up the subject at all. The flaw she had always tried to ignore was now on full display. Her eyes darted to the door, but Ruth had no intention of letting her leave.
“Would it not be better to practice with daily conversations?”
“I-I have…t-tried that as well b-but…m-my tongue refuses t-to cooperate.”
“On the contrary, my lady, I think you have improved quite a bit lately.”
Maxi’s eyes widened and Ruth gave her a wry smile.
“Have you not noticed?” he asked. “Apart from when you’re extremely flustered or nervous, you’ve been expressing yourself with relative ease.
Why don’t you try speaking slowly and focus on articulating as much as you can?
With repeated practice, I’m sure it will greatly improve your speech even if it cannot remedy it completely.
And that would be faster than relying on magic. ”
“P-Please do not speak a-as if it is a s-simple matter o-of practice! I-It’s not that I haven’t t-tried—I-I have!
B-But nothing I do e-ever helps. Th-That’s why—” Maxi cut off her outburst as Ruth frowned at her.
He had merely offered her advice, and she responded with heated words.
Embarrassed, Maxi hunched her shoulders.
“I-In any case,” she continued, “I-I appreciate y-your counsel. I-I shall c-consider it.”
Ruth opened his mouth as if to respond but closed it again without a word. Maxi swiftly rose from her seat and hurried out of the library.
Once alone, however, she felt uncertain. In truth, she had noticed that her speech was improving somewhat. Perhaps Ruth’s advice was not as hopeless a solution as it had first seemed. Maxi stalked down the corridor and came to a halt at the stairs.
Her father had never let her speak in front of others—Maxi’s lessons were usually held in a private room with only her tutor.
Even after her father had given up and she was freed from her strict education, Maxi had spoken only when necessary.
She had not wanted to seem a half-wit, but rarely speaking was also the best way to avoid the looks of exasperation when her words came out stuttering and slow.
She had once gone several months without saying a word just to avoid those looks and the baffled requests to repeat herself.
But speaking had become less daunting since she arrived at Calypse Castle. Maxi even found herself enjoying it. It was a startling change, one that she could hardly believe.
Did the impediment grow worse during the time I refused to speak?
Maxi bit her lip. It was possible that her father had crushed any potential she may have possessed. After insisting to Ruth that she had tried, she now was not sure that she truly had. What if all she had ever done was give up?
Even if that were the case, I’m sure it’s too late for me to fix it now.