Chapter Seventeen
The rain continued intermittently over the next few days, shrouding the landscape in a misty fog. Golden sunlight occasionally seeped through the pale clouds and lingered over the damp garden. The invigorating beauty of the sight lifted Maxi’s spirits.
For the first few days, Maxi sat by the window overlooking the grounds and studied the runes Ruth had prepared for her. When the pain in her stomach subsided, she went down to pick herbs and dropped by Ruth’s tower to read another book or mix healing remedies.
Learning new things by herself was no easy task.
It was exhausting to slog through dense tomes until her eyes grew dry, and practicing spells without the guidance of a mage was proving more difficult than she had imagined.
She barely understood what she was doing, but she desperately forged ahead with the tasks Ruth had left for her.
Though the days had been peaceful so far, there was no guarantee that it would last.
Anatol was a land bracing for turbulent change.
Its rapid growth meant that problems cropped up all the time, and with some new challenge every day, Maxi was learning more in her short time here than she had during the rest of her life prior.
These incidents made her realize the importance of being prepared.
It would not do for her to waste time. Her days started early so she could pore over runes or study herbs, and from time to time, she treated the injured in Ruth’s absence. After a while, even the soldiers who had initially been aloof around her gradually warmed up to her presence.
Her occasional visits to the infirmary eventually turned into daily sessions where she would treat five to ten people each time.
She even began treating minor ailments like colds, headaches, and insomnia with various herbal remedies.
It quickly grew into such a full-scale commitment that it was impossible for Riftan not to notice.
Maxi was at the infirmary at her usual time when she felt a chill run through her.
She turned around to find Riftan blocking the entryway, silently staring down at her.
Seeing his stony expression, she gulped.
Behind him, Hebaron was shaking his head as if to say that the moment of reckoning had arrived.
Gabel stood with his mouth clenched and his shoulders slumped, obviously feeling guilty for keeping her visits a secret.
Riftan stalked forward. “Care to explain what you are doing here?”
“I was t-told that someone was injured…so I was in the middle of t-treating them.”
Maxi nervously glanced about before schooling her expression and kneeling down to heal her current patient’s sprained ankle. She offered a stiff smile as she rose to her feet, meeting Riftan’s suspicious gaze. “I think…my job h-here is done. Well, then…please carry on.”
With that, she attempted to slip away, but her husband was not one to give up easily. He grabbed her arm to keep her from leaving. “I’m told that you’ve been coming to the infirmary as a healer for a while now…. Why was I not informed of this earlier?”
“Y-You have been busy. I did not wish t-to trouble you…with such trivial matters.”
His face hardened. “Stop being ridiculous. You deliberately hid it from me!”
“I did not h-hide it from you. I merely…did not mention it.”
“That’s your justification? Damn it. I was the only person in this castle who had no idea what my wife was doing the whole day. I feel like a fool! How could you do that behind my back when you know very well how much I worry for you?”
Maxi’s back prickled with cold sweat as she began to mumble her excuses before suddenly frowning at Riftan’s rebuke. What had she done to deserve such criticism? Anger flared inside her as she recalled all the efforts she had made thus far.
She looked up at Riftan defiantly. “Wh-What…exactly have I done wrong?”
Silence.
“What?” he finally asked.
“All I have done…is t-treat the injured. Is that such a bad thing? Is…h-helping the wounded something to be criticized for?”
“Goddammit, don’t avoid the question! You promised me last time, remember? You promised that you wouldn’t push your—”
“And I haven’t! Not once during the last two weeks have I been d-depleted of mana, n-nor have I felt dizzy.
” When Maxi refused to back down, a look of disconcertment flickered across Riftan’s face, but she continued, “I also haven’t done anything dangerous.
I have merely…t-tended to the wounded in the s-safety of these walls. ”
“You are the lady of this castle! Why do you also feel compelled to take on the role of healer?”
“B-Because I can!” Maxi cried, surprising even herself.
All her life, she had been dominated by the belief that she was incapable of doing anything. Yet here she was, asserting herself and challenging the will of her husband whom she was obliged to obey. Had she gone mad?
Maxi managed to swallow past the lump in her throat. She continued in a more respectful tone, “I am…currently the only person in this castle who is capable of h-healing magic. I won’t be…overexerting myself like last time. My mana has increased…so you need not worry about me fainting again.”
“I will hire a healer as soon as possible,” Riftan said. “I don’t like you doing this. Why do you insist on troubling yourself when you don’t have to?”
“Why…am I not allowed to t-trouble myself? You do it…R-Ruth does it…and the knights put themselves th-through all sorts of danger…. So why am I the only one n-not allowed to do so?”
“Because you are not like us. You are the daughter of a duke!”
Maxi’s face flushed crimson. For the first time in her life, she was suddenly overcome with the urge to hit someone.
“Wh-What of it? Even Princess Agnes…does all k-kinds of grueling tasks! So…wh-why can’t a duke’s daughter do the same?”
Unable to think of a retort, Riftan merely licked his lips. Hebaron, who had been watching everything from the back with his arms folded, blew a low whistle.
“The commander’s losing.”
Riftan shot him a glare and turned to stare at Maxi again.
“The princess is a grand sorceress with a lifetime of experience! How could you compare yourself to her?”
A collective gasp sounded through the room. Hebaron’s smirk melted away and he covered his forehead with his hand.
Maxi’s face blanched as she limply hung her head. To her shame, her eyes burned with tears. Even if that were the truth, did he have to say it in front of everyone? Anguish welled up inside her.
“Damn it. What I meant was—”
Maxi shook his hand from her shoulder, and the rest of his sentence died on his tongue. She glowered at him before storming out the door.
“I don’t…w-want to talk to you for a while!”
—
Although her husband was the last person she wanted to see right now, they still shared a bedchamber. It would be impossible for her to avoid him altogether. This was why she resorted to the admittedly childish tactic of feigning sleep.
“Maxi, we need to talk.”
Riftan had returned earlier than usual and now anxiously hovered by the bed.
Maxi lay still with the blanket pulled over her head like a caterpillar.
He tugged on the blanket impatiently, but Maxi clutched it until her fingers shook from the effort.
In a desperate attempt to appear asleep, she even began snoring.
“Goddammit, I know you’re awake. Stop pretending.”
Each yank of the covers grew rougher as he became more irritated. Maxi used all her strength to hold on to the blanket and obstinately kept her eyes shut. She could hear him gritting his teeth above her.
“Are you going to keep this up? A while ago, I…” Riftan trailed off, suddenly sounding deflated. He withdrew his hand and the bed dipped as he slumped down next to her. After a moment of heavy silence, he said coldly, “Fine. Do whatever you want.”
She heard his shoes fall to the ground as he took them off, before he moved to his side of the bed and lay down. Feeling resentful, Maxi positioned herself as far from him as possible and curled into a ball.
It was true that she did not wish to speak to him, but it also made her angry that he had so easily given up on trying to talk to her.
What was it that she wanted him to do? Pull her into his arms and grovel?
Apologize for his harsh words and tell her that he had not meant it? She felt betrayed by his indifference.
Their frostiness continued until the next day. Maxi refused to budge until Riftan left the room. It was only after he reluctantly set off for the day that she slowly got out of bed and ensconced herself in Ruth’s tower.
There, she spent her time reading and mixing herbs as she usually did.
Every so often, Riftan’s words would suddenly spring to mind, making it difficult for her to concentrate.
When that happened, she would collapse over the top of the desk and gnaw her lip.
No matter how hard she tried, it did not seem like Riftan would ever acknowledge her.
But why would he when she could not hold a candle to the beautiful grand sorceress who could have been his wife?
Maxi was unable to stop herself from spiraling.
She was certain now that he did not wish to share any other aspect of his life with her except for the five hours he spent sleeping in their bedchambers every night.
He wanted to treat her like a domesticated cat one kept in their room to pet from time to time.
She had thought that she had grown used to rejection, but her heart still ached.
Unable to focus on her studies at all, Maxi wallowed in her self-deprecation until she realized that it was the time she usually dropped by the infirmary.
She hesitated, knowing that she was not so thick-skinned that she could appear unperturbed to the knights after being humiliated in front of them yesterday.
Still, it also hurt her pride to stop her visits for that reason.
Everyone must think I was cowed by his words.