Chapter 22
twenty-two
AVA
Eight hours after leaving Harborview behind, I find myself in the same spot I was in two and a half weeks ago, except with shoes on this time.
I don’t think about the fact that Gage’s is the first place I go when I get back to Ashford Falls. I just knock.
He opens the door in a pair of low-slung sweatpants and nothing else. His hair is a little damp, like maybe he’s just gotten out of the shower. There’s worry in his eyes and exhaustion carved across his face, but it’s like it all falls away when he registers it’s me standing on his porch.
“Ava,” he breathes.
“Sorry, I know it’s early, but I just…” I shrug, my words trailing off.
He shakes his head as he reaches for me, pulling me to him in a tight hug. His hold is fierce but somehow gentle at the same time. The last bit of tension finally leaves my body as my arms go around his waist. Sandalwood and sage surround me, letting me take my first easy breath since I left my parents' house.
“You're safe.” It’s said so quietly that I don’t think it’s meant for me, but I still nod my head against him.
“I thought I would stop in Connecticut for a few hours to sleep, but once I started driving, I didn’t want to stop. I just wanted to be home.”
Gage’s hold tightens for a second before he pulls away, his eyes moving over my entire being like he’s checking to make sure I really am okay.
“Sorry, come in.” He moves to the side, giving me space to enter, but his hand falls to my lower back the second I’m in front of him, guiding me into his house. “Let me grab a shirt real quick.” His hand travels the entire expanse of my back and down my arm as he walks away. He only stops touching me when he’s too far.
I barely have time to remove my coat and slip off my boots, and Gage is back within a minute, pulling a shirt over his head and guiding me to the couch.
He winces as he takes the seat next to me, but it’s gone so quickly I think I might have imagined it.
“Will you tell me what happened?” Gage turns his body, lifting one leg onto the couch so his shin runs the length of my thigh. He places one arm along the back of the couch and reaches for my hand with his other, bringing our joined hands to his lap.
The movement causes the sleeve of my sweater to shift, exposing the bruises on my wrist from Brian’s grip. I try to hide them, but I’m not fast enough.
Gage's grip on my hand tightens just enough that I can’t pull away from him, but as he brings his arm from the back of the couch down to push up my sleeve, his touch is gentle.
“You told me you were okay.” His eyes are entirely focused on my wrist, gently turning my hand to get a full view of the bruise. It’s as he turns my hand over that the outline becomes recognizable. There’s no denying the discoloration is from a hand. “Ava.” His tone is pleading, almost pained. “Did your parents do this?”
I swallow. I don’t want to talk about this, but there’s also no hiding what happened. I know Gage well enough to know he’s fiercely protective of those he cares for, and I have no doubt I somehow fall into that category. If I don’t tell him, he’ll talk to my brother, and I’m definitely not ready to tell Declan.
“Not directly.”
“Ava, talk to me,” he begs. “You have all my extra strength. Whatever you need, you have it. Just talk to me.”
“I don’t know where to start.” My voice is quiet, almost meek, and I hate it. I’m not a meek person. I know what I want and I’m not afraid to go after it, but something happened in Brian’s office, and it altered me. I thought I started getting that piece of me back, but returning to Massachusetts proved it’s still missing.
Gage releases my hand and shifts even closer, his leg now pressed along my thigh. “Start wherever you want, whatever makes the most sense. There’s no rush.”
I study him for a moment, and all I see is understanding in his eyes. There’s no judgment or pity. Gage has always told me I could borrow his strength, and in this moment, I’m truly trusting him to give me everything he has and to help me carry this. I shift in my seat, turning to face him directly. My legs criss-crossing on the couch but still pressed against his. My hands rest in my lap, but I mess with the cuffs of my sweater, pulling them down to cover the bruises.
“I was fired from Henry, Wellsley, & Ford. I know you already know that, but the reason I got fired wasn’t because of anything I did.” I glance down at my lap, taking a fortifying breath before continuing. “I was fired because I refused to sleep with one of the partners’ sons.”
Gage squeezes my leg lightly, telling me he’s here and listening. It contrasts the tension I see coursing through the rest of his body and the anger I see flaring in his eyes. But I’m not afraid of it. I know it’s not aimed at me, but at Brian.
“Paul Wellsley and my father went to college together. They were roommates their first year and ended up pledging the same fraternity. They’ve been best friends ever since. And luckily for them, Paul’s wife and my mom get along famously.” My voice takes on a mocking tone. It’s a defense mechanism, trying to cover the tears I feel building.
I take a minute, my head tipping down to study my hands in my lap. “I guess somewhere along the way, they decided their son, Brian, and I would make the perfect pair. As if living in the Elizabethan era or something, my parents arranged my marriage to Brian.”
“What?” It comes out as more of a breath than a word, and I get it—the disbelief.
“Yeah.” I nod absently, still looking at my lap. “I don’t know why they didn’t tell me or why they waited so long to actually follow through on it. But I guess Brian got tired of waiting.” I lift my eyes to look at Gage. “His parents told him about the arrangement as soon as it was decided, and being eight years older than me, he felt it was high time we were married so he could begin working on getting his heir to the Wellsley empire.” That mocking tone is back, but this time I can’t stop the tears from welling in my eyes. They don’t fall, but I feel them there.
Gage doesn’t move, though I see the anger flare again.
“Brian has been working for the firm since before he graduated from law school, but he’s a criminal defense lawyer, and I worked in family law. Our paths rarely crossed while at work. And personally, while he might have attended the same events I did, we always stuck to our own crowd. When I say Brian and I rarely talked, I mean it.”
“Ava, you don’t have to defend yourself to me,” he says gently.
“I know, but looking back on it, I should have known something was off.” I lift a hand and wipe desperately at my right cheek where a tear slips free.
Gage reaches forward, wiping softly at my cheek. It’s with such care that it almost takes my breath away. He takes hold of both my hands, holding them gently. “You can’t judge yourself for actions made based on the information you have now. There’s a reason they say hindsight is twenty-twenty. Nothing that happened was your fault, regardless of what you know now.”
“He asked to see me in his office one evening. I didn’t really think anything of it, so I went. It was late, but that was normal. I wasn’t even in his office five minutes before he tried to force himself on me.”
His hands squeeze mine, only for a moment, as if he didn’t have control for a second.
“I fought him the best I could.” Another tear slips free, and he wipes that one away, too. “I got lucky. His assistant came in before he could do more than tear my blouse. I didn’t even wait for either of them to say anything before I got the hell out of there.”
A few more tears spill, and Gage’s fingers remain there to catch every one. I give myself a second this time before I continue speaking. When I do, my voice is a little steadier—calmer.
“I went to my parents’ place instead of going home. I don’t really know why. I’ve never considered my parents as all that caring, but I thought they would support me. Or at least bring me some level of comfort, but they didn’t believe me.” I shrug, trying to make myself believe it doesn’t matter more than trying to convince Gage of that fact. “Brian called his parents as soon as I left his office, and his parents called mine before I got there. They spun some story about how I came onto him and was embarrassed that his assistant walked in on us.” I nod, a rueful smile taking shape. “That’s when they told me about the arranged marriage. They informed me that the announcement would be made in the paper after the new year, with the wedding happening in July.”
Gage’s head falls, his grip on my hands tightening a bit. He takes a deep breath, holding it for a second before releasing it. When he lifts his eyes back to mine, I continue.
“I left and went back to Boston, carrying on like nothing happened. Except I made sure I went nowhere near Brian and didn’t talk to my parents. Two weeks later I was fired. Declan called about Nicole suing for custody the following evening, and I got on the next flight out.” I shrug. “You know the rest.”
Gage lifts one hand, pushing the sweater back to expose my bruise. “That’s not all of it,” he says quietly.
“No, I guess it isn’t.” I look back down at my lap, not sure I want to see his face for this next part. “About two weeks ago, Brian called me.” I feel the tension in the air rise. Gage knows exactly what day I’m talking about. “He told me I had a week to come home and begin planning the wedding. He made it very clear the longer I took to return, the worse it would be for me.”
“Ava.” It’s hurt I hear in his voice now, and I hate that I’ve caused it.
My grip on his hand tightens this time. “I’ve never lied to you.” I lift my eyes to his, wanting to make sure he hears me. “I told you there were other factors, and there were, but all Brian’s call did was push me to remember that I don’t cower to anyone. I go after what I want, and that’s exactly what I did that night.”
“Ava—”
“No, Gage.” I take his face in my hands, forcing him to look at me. “That night was about me taking control of my life and forgetting about everyone and everything else.”
His eyes bounce between mine, searching for something. I know he’ll find it because I’m not lying to him. Brian might have triggered something in me that night, but Gage didn’t take advantage of me. I wanted everything that happened between us.
“Okay,” he whispers, gently bringing his hands to my wrists and moving them back to my lap. “Tell me the rest.”
“When my dad called a week later, he swore the arrangement was off with the Wellsleys and that he talked to my mother about how she’d been speaking to me since everything first happened with Brian. He swore I wouldn’t have to see or speak about the Wellsleys or the arrangement again. He just wanted me to come home and for us to have a nice Christmas together.” I take a deep breath, feeling the tears building again.
“I figured I needed to pack my apartments anyway, so what was the harm? I could pack and tell my parents about my move in one fell swoop.” I shrug.
“Everything was going fine. I landed in Boston on Sunday and spent all day Monday and most of the day yesterday packing what I wanted and organizing the rest for donation later in the week. When I got to my parents, they were already in their rooms getting ready for the party, so I headed to mine and did the same.” My head falls, and I study our clasped hands in my lap.
“I was a little late coming down the stairs, but Dad greeted me and we joined Mom to greet guests as they arrived.” I shake my head slightly. “About thirty minutes later, Brian’s parents showed up with Brian in tow.”
“Rebel.” I hear it in Gage’s voice, how he wants me to stop, but his eyes tell me to keep going. He’s giving me that strength, just like he said he would.
“They mentioned the engagement, and I didn’t wait around. I told them I was moving to Ashford Falls and left them standing there. I went to my room to grab my things and booked it for my car, but I wasn’t fast enough.”
“Brian was waiting for you,” Gage offers.
“Yeah. I tried to go back inside, but he saw me. He came toward me so quickly—berating me for my behavior—and I knew he would corner me no matter where I was. He tried to force himself on me again, and—” I gulp, trying to control my emotions, but the tears slip free.
I don’t think I realized how afraid I was when Brian had his hand in my dress until right now. “I don’t think I would have been able to fight him off. Not if it hadn’t been for a caterer coming out the back door and distracting him long enough for me to stomp on his foot and get away.”
Gage doesn’t wipe the tears this time. He shifts on the couch, pulling me across his lap and holding me to him in a tight embrace. He doesn’t offer any empty promises or platitudes about everything being okay. He just holds me until the tears dry up.