Chapter 36 #2
How do I fix a shattered mug that she’s had for the past twenty years…
do they even still make them? What if it was hand-crafted?
Shit! And even if I do manage to find another, it won’t have that little chip on the rim.
It won’t be the same. Maybe I can recreate the fall and hope the outcome is the same. Yeah, that seems achievable… I think.
I exit my gallery and start browsing online for sunflower mugs, not one looking like hers. I go back to my pictures and search for a picture with her mug. I must have one somewhere, even if it’s in the background… There!
I fall on a picture of her sitting cross-legged on our bed. The sheets are wrapped around her waist, her upper body on display and only partially covered by her arms, holding her special mug. I remember that day. It was the morning after Valentine’s Day, and I had brought her breakfast in bed.
I zoom into the picture until all I can see is the mug. Taking a screenshot, I head into my Google image search and attach the photo of the mug and pray the results will be fruitful. Holy shit! I found it!
The first result that pops up is a website I can order from. Perfect. Quantity? A hundred should be enough? Express shipping? Thank you, baby Jesus! I complete my order feeling satisfied.
One problem about to be fixed. Now all that’s left is to add the chip for it to be complete. But fuck, with hockey, how am I going to find the time? Plus, I can’t do it while Bunny’s around, or Gracie. What do I do? I’ll need help…
I quickly go back to my order, modifying it before it gets processed and changing the shipping address to Morgan’s. Then I head into my messages and create a group chat with Morgan, Cecilia, Aubrey, and Ronnie.
Me
Ladies, sorry to message so early. But I really fucked up with Emma… I need your help while I’m gone.
I don’t expect them to answer right away since it’s just after 3:00 in the morning. But to my surprise, my phone instantly vibrates back to life with incoming texts.
Ronnie
FINALLY! A man willing to admit when he’s fucked up.
Morgan
Count us in.
Cecilia
Anything you need, we’ll do it.
Aubrey
How can we help?
I smile for the first time in what feels like days, when in reality it’s only been hours. I knew I could count on them. They love Em and would do anything to see her happy, including helping me fix my mistakes.
I quickly explain what I need from them and get confirmation that they’re all on board. Just as we finish exchanging messages, I receive texts from another group chat, the one I share with the guys.
Hayes
Stop messaging my wife in the middle of the night, Ford!
Burkley
I was coming to say the same. Don’t you have your own woman now?
Me
Fuck off.
Adler
Shit! You texting BOTH their wives?! You’ve got bigger balls than I do, man.
Ellis
Is this a thing? We’re allowed to message your wives without getting beat up?? Why didn’t you guys tell me!
Me
You guys are idiots.
Burkley
Send my wife another naked picture and I’ll kill you, Ellis!
Hayes
YOU’RE FUCKING DEAD, ELLIS! Better not show up on the plane tomorrow!
Adler
brO… Did you really send Morg and Cece dick pics?
Ellis
It wasn’t a dick pic! The image cuts off right before my junk. And I didn’t ONLY send it to Morgan and Cecilia. Emma, Aubrey, and Ronnie got one too.
Me
YOU SENT A DICK PIC TO MY SISTER!?!
Ellis
IT’S NOT A DICK PIC!!!
Adler
Hold up a minute! How’d you get Veronica’s number?
Hayes
I was wondering that too.
Burkley
Probably stole her phone at some point and texted himself.
Ellis
No! I’m not that obsessed with her. Give me some credit, guys!
Buckley
Fine. Then how’d you get it?
Ellis
I went through Emma’s phone.
Me
YOU WHAT?!
Ellis
What? She always leaves it lying around. It was there for the taking. Btw, you guys have some weird ass kinks…
Me
Ellis, I swear! I’m about to get in my car and beat the shit out of you!
Adler
Bro… I think you should call in sick tomorrow… At this point, there’s no way you’re making it to Carolina without a broken something.
Hayes
Take his advice, Ellis.
Ellis
Nah, I’m not scared of you guys.
Burkley
And that’s your problem right there.
Me
Okay, but why is everyone awake at this time?
Adler
Because you texted their wives during the night.
Ellis
Yes! Let’s get back on Ford’s case and forget about breaking my face.
Hayes
Not a chance.
Burkley
Nope.
Adler
I’ll pray for you.
I chuckle with a head shake and set my phone on the nightstand, checking the time as I plug it in. Shit, already 4:00 in the morning. No point in sleeping now when the little one will be up in two or three hours. I’ll just nap on the plane.
I head into the bathroom and take a shower, get changed, and pack up my suitcase for later. Then I head downstairs, get the coffee machine started, and decide on what to make for breakfast.
It’s 6:00 in the morning when I hear Gracie’s babbling through the monitor. I quickly take everything off the stovetop, not wanting to ruin all my hard work, and take the stairs two at a time. I quickly grab my little girl, change her diaper and pajamas, then go back to the kitchen.
I try to keep Gracie as quiet as possible by handing her small pieces of fruit until I finish making breakfast. I know Em had a rough night, and I want to let her rest as much as possible.
An hour later, footsteps sound from above, and I know Emma’s awake. I warm up her food, set her plate out, and make her coffee in a heart-shaped mug she got during her birthday trip.
A few minutes later, she comes into view, and I hate what I see. Her face is red like she viciously rubbed it clean, probably to hide her red, swollen eyes. Even the tip of her nose is red. She was clearly crying this morning too…
But that’s not what guts me the most. No. It’s the look of indifference she carries even with all the evidence that points otherwise. I know it’s a facade, a blank mask to hide how she really feels, but it still sucks to see it.
I walk over to Gracie’s highchair and pass my fingers through her messy hair that I haven’t taken the time to brush yet. “Look, Buttercup, Mommy’s finally awake.” Gracie squeals and claps her hands when she notices Emma, stretching them out toward her for her morning cuddles.
Bunny visibly stiffens at the name, pain flashing in her eyes before she shakes it all away.
She takes the few steps toward our girl with a stern look directed at me.
“Don’t do that. Don’t say something one day and then change your mind the next.
You’ve made it clear I’m not her mother, so don’t start acting like I am,” she spits harshly in a low tone.
“But you are.”
“Stop. Please. I don’t want to fight. I’m here to do my job, which is taking care of Gracie, nothing else.”
I bite the inside of my cheek, holding back from saying anything else… for now.
She wants me to stop, but she should know better.
There’s no way I’m stopping. No way I’m letting those nasty words linger in her mind any longer than necessary.
No, I’m going to keep telling her how I feel, keep showing her until she finally believes it.
It will probably piss her off, but I don’t care.
Em comes to stand before Gracie, her face transforming to one of adoration as her hand cups our daughter’s cheek. “Good morning, Gracie,” she says and kisses her crown once. She then quickly straightens and looks away, letting go altogether and walking over to her seat where her plate waits.
She doesn’t look over as Gracie continues to try and get her attention.
Instead, she keeps her eyes trained on the food in front of her.
She didn’t pick her up or hug her like she would normally do.
She didn’t say something silly or tell her how beautiful she looked this morning. She didn’t call her Little Tulip.
I know what Em’s doing. She’s distancing herself from Gracie because she feels it’s what she needs to do. And it fucking devastates me. I won’t tolerate that.
I remove Gracie from her highchair since she’s been feasting for the past hour and set her down with her toys in the living room, hoping that will distract her from Emma for the time being.
“I see you have a theme going on here,” Em says as she picks up her fork. She’s right, I may have overdone it, and it may come off as cheesy as fuck, but I don’t care. I’m trying to get a message through.
Her plate contains heart-shaped pancakes, heart-shaped eggs, and heart-shaped bread. I also made heart-shaped fruit kebabs, heart-shaped strawberry cream cheese pastries, and a white chocolate and raspberry smoothie. Along with her coffee in a heart-shaped mug.
I think the message is pretty clear.
“Only the best for the woman I love.” I stand on the opposite side of the island and watch her as I sip my second coffee.
She doesn’t look up at me as she speaks in an uncertain voice. “What are you doing, Greyson?”
“Showing you how I feel.”
“Well, stop. It’s highly inappropriate. I work for you, which makes you my boss. You shouldn’t be saying or doing things like this.” What the fuck?
“Don’t do that, Em. Don’t act like what we have means nothing and you can just forget about it with the snap of your fingers.” I feel the irritation rising, but I take a deep breath to keep my cool.
Her head finally lifts to look at me, and no matter how hard she tries to keep a blank expression, pain swims behind her eyes. “Had. You mean what we had.”
Now my anger bubbles below the surface. I feel my nostrils flare as I work my jaw. I don’t want to yell at her, and I certainly don’t want to start another fight, but she’s pushing my buttons right now.
“No, Emma. Have. We had one fight where we said some shitty things we didn’t mean. But that doesn’t mean it’s over, and that sure as fuck doesn’t erase everything else between us,” I say through clenched teeth.
“Watch your mouth!” she hisses, then lifts her finger and points at me with an angry scowl. “And I didn’t say anything, you did! You’re the one who messed up, not me!”
“You’re right, I did. But I’m fixing it.”
She glares for a moment, then refocuses on her food. “Whatever.”
I sigh at her clear indication that she’s done with this conversation. She finishes her breakfast in silence, not once looking at me while I can’t take my eyes off her. Her phone vibrates from behind me with a message from Cecilia.
I pick it up and pass it to her. “Here, you have a text from Cecilia. And if you have one from Gabe, don’t open it.”
“Why?” she asks with furrowed brows as she takes the device from my hand.
“It’s a long story, but you should probably put a lock on your phone. Apparently, he thinks it’s appropriate to go through it when you’re not looking.”
“He what?!” Wide eyes stare back at me.
“Don’t worry, I’ll deal with it.”
Those wide eyes turn to a glare once more. “I don’t need you to fight my battles.”
“Well, too bad, Bunny. You’re stuck with me, which means I’ll fight them for you.” I fold my arms over my chest, showing her that I won’t back down from this.
Her jaw locks as she watches me. Finally, she stands, carrying her plate to the sink, but I grab it from her hands. “I’ll take care of it.”
She nods. “I’m going to take a shower,” she says before turning and heading for the stairs.
“Okay. Oh, and Emma?”
She looks back over her shoulder.
“I love you.”
She swallows, and her eyes gloss over, then she quickly looks away and runs up the stairs. I know getting Emma’s forgiveness won’t be an easy task, but I’m not a quitter. If I have to tell her I love her every chance I get, I will.
I never should have waited so long to say it.