Chapter VII
l felt like I was slowly going crazy staying here, I almost rather be back in my cell.
Okay, that was a lie. Nothing would ever be worse than that cell.
But at least that made some type of twisted sense and had a foreseeable end, even if that end was death.
I didn't fully understand my purpose for being here and was growing sick of Arien's constant delusional presence around me.
He kept trying to talk to me, eat with me, walk with me - in some twisted way befriend me I guess.
I was having none of it. He was making my threat sound better and better by the moment.
..I'd never killed a person but maybe I could do something bad enough to get him to no longer want me?
Which could go one of two ways;
1. He lets me go.
2. He keeps me here tortures me once more for whatever I'd plan.
As much as I didn't want to admit it, deep down I knew that I was too scared to do anything that would land me back in that dark hole.
But also, there was no one else to talk to and the craziness would probably set in.
Constance, appeared and disappeared, not offering much in terms of conversation, then again, I wasn't exactly the most social person so it was probably my fault.
There was another man, a butler or guard of some sorts, who often carried messages into S?ren's study.
His name was Ranveer I believe, but again, not a talker.
And I didn't trust any man around this estate.
The house was massive but not being allowed outside made it feel like a slowly constricting cage. Most of my time was spent between my room and a computer and library room.
I figured I would bide my time while figuring out an escape and learning about my captors seemed worthwhile in this endeavor.
Cue the piles of werewolf books I pawed over in the library.
The computers were off limits, locked out with a password so I had to glean all my information from these books.
Ares would have probably offered answers but I was trying to limit our interactions to the best of my ability.
Also, I wanted to keep my human nature a secret for as long as possible and something might slip out.
Holed up in the library, I'd learned a lot. Especially about mates.
Another reason to keep that to myself.
Sounds as crazy as the rest of it.
This was definitely not a problem in my situation though. One wanted to murder me, the other keep me locked up.
My head hurt from all this new and strange information. It felt so far fetched to me and I hated that I ever had to come to know of it.
The door to the library was harshly pulled open mid way through my investigations this day.
I froze, breath stalling.
S?ren.
He paused for a moment, taking in the books strewn around and then redirected his gaze to my face.
Did he always look angry or did the scars have something to do with it? I doubted my accurate judgement of his features a lot of the time.
"Come to the dining hall."
I'd been avoiding Arien for the past couple of days, that was a resounding no way.
Trying to keep my voice from catching, "I'm alright dining in my room thanks." I smiled derisively back.
"It's not a question."
I swallowed and again tried to sound normal but with my next words, "No."
Forget how loud my heart was beating.
Now he looked downright pissed, in a moment he was striding over to me.
I forced myself to remain still. No shaking, no backing away, definitely no flinching - no weakness. That's what got you eaten alive.
I just about managed, but when his hand extended and roughly wrapped around my wrist and tugging me to standing, I couldn't help the yelp that I emitted as I pulled away.
They'd done a number on my wrists and my stupid body wasn't doing a good job of healing.
His brow furrowed just a tad, "I didn't grip you that hard," he muttered.
Was that a statement or a question? I answered him anyways.
"No but my wrists still hurt."
You brute.
The brow remained furrowed, "You should have healed by now."
Now I was annoyed, it sounded like he was blaming me for not healing, like the prick I knew him to be.
"What? No obviously-" Then it hit me.
Werewolf. Or at least, that's what I was pretending to be.
They would've probably healed by now, I knew their bodies had better capabilities compared to humans. Shit.
I cleared my throat, "I mean, yeah, they did - I just hurt myself again is what I meant."
That sounded believable, right? I tried to keep my features looking calm and schooled.
He was just silent again. But still watching me, and watching me from way too close. He hadn't moved away.
It made my skin prickle - HE made my skin prickle.
Why was he taking this long to respond? My gut twisted, I should probably just go along with dinner. Anything was better than him in such close proximity.
"Is that so?" He finally breathed.
He didn't believe me. Shit.
I forced my eyes to meet his dark ones, unfathomable as always ones, "Yes. Completely better."
"Anyways, I guess I should just go to dinner."
I started to move away from him towards the door but focused on keeping my steps normal, not to fast - I needed to seem calm and not as shaky and wind blown as I felt on the inside.
S?ren didn't stop me.
That is, until I had nearly reached the door, when he forcibly yanked me back towards him. I gasped at his touch and immediately tried to free myself. Futilely.
Spinning me to face him, his hands were wrapped on either side of my ribs, nearly encasing me completely. My breath had long lost me but I managed to squeeze out, "What are you doing?"
My voice no longer as strong as I wished it to be.
He all but snarled lowly back at me, "You're not hurt anymore. So this shouldn't hurt."
Could black get any darker? I would have sworn not but that's what his eyes did as they sank into mine. Black. Loathing. That's all I could make out.
He pressed down, the pressure steadily increasing.
Pain shot through me instantly, nearly causing me to cry out.
I had forgotten or maybe chose not think about how strong he was, how easily he could crush me, and because of that, I was now experiencing my personal reminder. My own fucking fault for letting my guard slip.
I stubbornly stared back, not breathing but not making a sound either. Not giving him what he wanted. He could go to hell.
This seemed to make the darkness simmer more and leak out of him, his grip now nearly crushing me.
The pain made me lightheaded, or maybe it was my lack of breathing. But still, I refused to give in, it felt like my stubbornness was all I had left.
With one final dark glare my way, he relented.
Thank heavens. I struggled to right myself, stumbling but managed to keep myself from crumpling to the ground.
Next, I drew in some much needed deep breaths.
And only once my body seemed convinced the pain had resided, did I gain some control back.
I immediately forced myself to move, no run, out the room.
I didn't care how scared or weak it made me look. I just needed to get away.
From him.
I needed to stop my fear from overtaking me again.
Making it to my room, I slammed the door closed and slumped down. All my fight draining from my limbs, leaving only shaky unease in its place.
Quickly, trying to make myself feel safer, I forced myself to my feet and started pushing furniture against the door. Only stopping once I was out of breath and firmly barricaded in.
Safe.
And then, and only then did the tears fall and the fear manage to creep its insidious tentacles around me. Crushing me, constricting me. Much like S?ren's hold had done.