Kellan
Chapter Thirty
Icouldn’t wait for this house remodel project to be finished.
Here I was on a Tuesday morning, waiting on the second refrigerator to be delivered when I would rather have been with Layla on her day after chemo.
Given their decisions to change everything from the wood of the floors to the brand of appliances, the Williamses were fickle with their choices.
And Carly seemed to be an influence in that regard.
But I wouldn’t let it break me. I was in the homestretch now.
Only a few days more, and we’d wrap up this job.
After that, I could move on to my next couple of projects.
At least the word of mouth regarding this remodel had lined up plenty of new work.
Although I sensed Layla was up in the air about what she wanted to do after the cancer treatments, I hoped she’d choose to stay here in Seattle.
Finances and logistics weren’t things we’d discussed, but at least she’d shared her concerns about her apartment last night.
The fact she wasn’t working and was now on long-term disability would certainly make it difficult to afford the rent in Seattle.
I wished I’d realized the situation before she’d spent a moment stressing about it.
I wanted her to move in with me. Wished to come home each night to her in my bed.
Perhaps our living together would demonstrate how invested I was in our future.
It would show her how much I hoped she’d be open to staying with me here in Seattle even after the treatments.
I was determined we wouldn’t be robbed of that future.
Not the way Shelly with her three kids and husband had been robbed.
Not the way Layla feared she might, too.
Not the way I secretly did when she wasn’t able to witness it.
Fuck. I took a moment outside on the rear balcony of the house, rubbing the palms of my hands against my eyes to keep from getting emotional about it.
I needed to be the strong one. The one who looked on the bright side and maintained positivity.
Not the one who was absolutely petrified of losing the love of his life.
We’d work out the logistics in the next couple of weeks.
I’d figure out a way to convince her to move in with me.
Once we put the cancer treatments in the past, we could talk about the future and then the life I dreamed of could happen.
We were in such a great place at this point, I couldn’t imagine anything coming between us. I had to believe it would all work out. It just had to.
Yet the moment I woke up two mornings later with a sore throat, I experienced a new level of fear. With Layla’s immune system completely compromised, especially this week after her chemo treatment, I couldn’t afford to be sick. That meant the chance she might get sick. I dialed her first thing.
“Hello,” her sleepy voice answered.
“Hey. You feeling okay?”
“Yes. Tired, but okay.”
I breathed a sigh of relief. At least I hadn’t kissed her the last couple of nights. But we’d definitely done our share over the previous weekend, before her chemo when she’d been in her feel-good window. “I woke up with a sore throat. I wanted to confirm you didn’t have it.”
“Nope. I think we’re in the clear. You think you have strep?”
“I don’t know. Maybe just a cold.” Hopefully it would pass quickly. We’d gotten our flu shots weeks ago, so here was hoping they’d ward off anything more serious.
“I’m sorry you’re not feeling good.”
Leave it to Layla to think of me when she was feeling a hundred times worse. “Baby, I’ll be fine. But I’m worried about you. I couldn’t live with myself if I got you sick.”
“I’m sure it’ll be fine. Feel better. I miss you already. Love you.”
“Love you, too.”
Three days later, I was still battling a doozy of a cold. But the worst part by far was that I had to keep my distance from Layla. I’d checked in with her, and thankfully, she’d assured me I hadn’t passed it on.
So much for convincing her to move in with me. Right now, I had to stay as far away from her as possible.
By the next weekend, my cold had made its way into my chest. I called her on Saturday morning after having slept in for the first time in years. I’d been exhausted. Continuing to work through my cold probably wasn’t doing me any favors for healing.
“Hello,” she answered, sounding as if she’d been sleeping.
“Hi, beautiful.” I started coughing the moment I said the words.
“You sound worse.”
“I feel worse.”
“I wish I could come over and take care of you the way you do for me.”
“That’s sweet, but the best thing you can do for me is to keep your distance. Which hurts me to say.”
“It hurts to hear, but I understand.” A sneeze came after her words.
“You’re not getting sick, are you?” Panic hit me over the little symptom.
“Just a sneeze. I’m probably allergic to you being away from me.”
That put a smile on my face. “Hopefully it won’t be long.”
“You’re not working this weekend, right?”
I had a few things I needed to do, but I was hoping I could rest, too. “Nah. I’ll get some sleep and hopefully feel better by Monday.”
“Good. I’m counting the days until I get to see you.”
“Me too, babe. Me too.”