Chapter 38 #3
I looked for similarities between Tony and Quill. But as much as he resembled his mother physically, Quill seemed to resemble hers. The only things they shared were dark hair and clear gray eyes. And the way they could both stare into your soul until you felt like an open book.
Frustrated and on the verge of letting him in on the secret, I looked away, deciding to avoid his gaze.
“I talked to him. It was a slip-up and it will never happen again.”
“A damn slip-up?” I turned back to him, staring him down. “Tony, did you see her neck?”
My hand automatically went to that spot and I grimaced at the thought of the pain that a careless touch there must cause her. I shouldn't have touched her there yesterday, even though I had been careful.
“You should have seen her wrists a few weeks ago.”
“I know my father,” Tony gritted out. “He’s not a bad person. He just needs help.”
This time, he turned away from me, as if he had a reason to be angry with her.
“Your sister needs help.”
Tony snorted with laughter.
“You know nothing about the situation.”
My patience snapped.
“I know enough to judge that she and her father shouldn't be under the same roof.”
Tony's jaw began to work, but he avoided my gaze.
He knew how right I was.
“I saw it in her eyes. Those injuries were nothing to her compared to everything she had obviously been through with him.”
Tony stared at me as if I had slapped him.
Had I said too much? Had I said something I couldn't possibly know?
“She grew up with her mother.” His voice was calmer now, though strained. “An alcoholic.”
“Just like your father.”
His jaw visibly tensed.
“Davian, Father is not...”
“God, Anthony!” I snapped at him, not caring that the ducks in our immediate proximity were taking flight. “How long are you going to keep your eyes closed?”
We had talked about it. Apparently not enough.
Anthony saw his father more often than I did. He saw what alcohol did to him. And I didn't even want to know what kind of man Joseph was under the influence of alcohol.
Wasn't all that enough for Tony? What more had to happen for him to make that the last drop? Or was he maintaining a non-existent peace, just as I had done until now?
Taking a deep breath, I turned away from him and walked, with both hands in the pockets of my sweatpants, to the edge of the artificial park lake.
Minutes passed in which we were silently preoccupied with ourselves, in which I wondered what Quill had done to deserve this family and why Joseph had taken me under his wing back then. Had I been his means of repressing the fact that he had fathered an illegitimate child?
Tony cleared his throat and stepped beside me.
“What do you suggest?” He sounded calm, like a different person. And for the first time in a long time, he reminded me of Joseph. “That I sit here twiddling my thumbs, hoping Gravia is okay?”
Gravia Onera Richter.
That name alone gave me stomach pains.
“If she doesn't show up on campus on Monday, you can still call the police. I imagine she's gone to stay with friends.” I turned to him, then walked past him, back to the paved platform with its ornately curved steel railing. “Or she's gotten campus housing.”
“She won't continue her studies there.”
Tony followed me.
“She will. And she'll participate in the debates.”
“Davian. That's not possible.”
I turned to him with a challenging look.
“Why not?”
“Do you want to...” He hesitated, searching for something in my eyes that he wouldn't find there. “Do you want to cover for her?”
An emotionless laugh escaped my lips.
“Like you did? Like your father was forced to do?”
Tony swallowed, almost imperceptibly.
“Give me one reason why I should make her life a living hell.”
I reached for my tracksuit jacket on the park bench and pulled it over my white T-shirt.
The cold side of autumn was gradually creeping into Maplecrest.
“Your job is on the line.”
Tony followed me, trying to meet my gaze, and I caught a desperate look in his eyes.
“You don’t have to do this for me.”
How could I explain to him that I was doing it solely for his sister?
And suddenly I realized that there was now something standing between Tony and me. Something that could ruin our friendship if I didn't actively seek a solution to all the problems affecting the Richters. If I didn't keep my distance from Quill.
A headache began to set in, and only now did I feel the overload haunting every nerve ending in my body.
I started jogging, wanting to get away from here, but Tony followed me. Of course he did. Because we had been jogging together for sixteen years. Because we were like brothers who didn't just abandon each other.
I had to help him, even though I didn't yet know how to do that without also having to deal with Joseph.
“Now I understand...” He caught up with me, and the realization in his voice made me nervous. “You think you owe it to Monica.”
Relief followed, and I tried to focus on the park path ahead of me.
Monica had held everything together over the past few years. Lying to her any longer felt like betrayal. As if I were no better than Joseph.
When would I ever be able to satisfy all sides without a war breaking out? When would I finally find peace?
If we constantly try to maintain balance,
do we ever truly live?
– Leaking Batteries Diary