Chapter 35
ANASTASIA
The sound of running water jolts me awake.
I rub my eyes getting rid of the sleepiness and I find myself in a room I don’t recognize, but a familiar scent surrounds me.
Eryx. I toss the covers off of me and notice I’m only wearing a hoodie, I look across the room where I see my jeans and socks neatly folded and laid out on a chair in the corner.
I take in my surroundings and find this room is very much a reflection of him.
Everything is neatly organized and his personality speaks through his decorations.
More books and music line the wall across from his bed.
The room is illuminated by the light of the moon outside and a small desk lamp.
The bedroom windows are floor to ceiling, as I get closer my breath is taken away by the view before me.
I can see the ocean from here. I instantly feel at peace.
Someone clears their throat behind me. “You’re awake, did you get enough rest?”
I turn around and find Eryx at the entrance of the room in nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist, water still dripping from his hair. I can see the steam coming off his body.
I’m all googley eyes. “I uhh—yeah. Thank you.”
He steps further into the room and heads for his closet.
I notice his knuckles are bruised, and even after his apparent shower, I can see red marks. “What happened to your knuckles?”
“Stray cat.” He answers quickly and doesn’t elaborate further. Its not my business anyway, right?
“You brought me to your apartment?” Another question.
He drops the towel, baring his glorious ass to me.
An ass sculpted by the damn Gods. Why does this man have to be so damn hot?
On his back I catch sight of a tattoo I hadn’t noticed before.
Stretched across his shoulder blades and dropping down towards his ribs, is a black bird.
Its wings are spread and loose feathers fall around it. It’s beautiful.
“Stop objectifying my ass Anastasia. I feel your eyes burning a hole behind me.” He gives me a small laugh before answering my question. “I come here when I need to clear my head, and after what happened today..I thought you might need the same.”
He slips on some boxers and a pair of grey sweats that hang off his waist. I come up behind him and hug him. He smells of bergamot and cloves, with a hint of smoke. He’s become my favorite scent.
“Thank you, for today. For saving me. Again.”
“I’ll always save you Moya Vorona.”
There’s that nickname again. “You always call me that, what does it mean?” I finally ask the questions that’s been circling my mind since I first heard the name.
“Raven.”
“Why?”
“Since the moment I first laid eyes on you I saw through you. Saw what you didn’t want anyone else to see.
Saw it in your eyes how you were trapped in your life.
Fighting each day just trying to survive.
I recognized you because I was looking in a mirror.
” He’s facing me now, right hand meets my face, caressing my cheek and brushing a stray hair behind my ear, “You and I. The other side of the coin. You’re my pretty black bird.
With your obsidian hair, and eyes like cherry-cola with specks of sage when the light hits them just right. ”
His eyes locked on mine, looking into my soul like he knows me, because he does. “You are not to blame for the darkness in your life. None of it is your fault.” He says it with conviction, he says it as if there’s a truth only he knows behind it.
His lips ghosting over mine. Our noses brushing. “You’re perfectly imperfect, such a beautiful flaw, that mind of yours. I see your demons baby, because I have them too.” He whispers to me.
“I don’t want them anymore,” I whisper back.
“Then give them to me, I’ll kill them.” He closes the space between us, his kiss is soft at first. Starting with small pecks.
His hand moving to the back of my neck, fingers intertwined in my hair.
His other hand is on my waist, pulling me closer to him.
I can feel the heat from his chest radiating though his hoodie I’m still wearing.
Then his kisses turn more heated, his tongue parting my lips, seeking entrance, and I let him in. He tastes like everything I’ve even wanted and never had. Tastes like my salvation, like mine.
He kisses me like the thought of losing me would be his ruin. Like I mean the world to him. And Gods I hope I do.
I think I’m falling for him and that terrifies me.
He pulls away, taking another piece of me with him, and oh how I want him to have all of me.
“You must be hungry,” he says.
I can feel my cheeks still heated. My thighs rub together with desire for him. “Yeah I’m famished actually.”
“Ok, well, follow me. Let’s change that.” He places a kiss on my forehead, then he leads me to his kitchen.
I’m in awe for the second time tonight. He’s got a gourmet kitchen, with two ovens and gas stove. I was so high off my ass last time I was here I never really took in the place.
He pulls a pot from the cupboard and fills it with water. “You like spaghetti right?”
“Uhh, yes, one of my favorites actually.”
“Perfect, start dicing some tomatoes, we’re going to make some fresh sauce.”
“Yes, chef,” I give him a salute and a wink.
“Oh baby, you keep that up, and we’ll never get the food done.”
I hold back a laugh as I walk to the fridge and grab some tomatoes for dicing. The fridge is fully stocked with fruits and vegetables.
I bet Caine loves it here.
I see he has rosemary and a few other herbs, so I grab them too. I’m about to ask where his cutting board and knives are at when I see he’s already pulled them out for me to use.
I take the tomatoes to the sink and rinse them off. I have about a dozen, and I start to quarter them. Eryx is next to me, chopping an onion and a few garlic cloves. When we finish chopping our respective ingredients, he grabs a pan and throws some olive oil on it as we wait for it to heat up.
“You do this often?” I ask him.
“Yeah, I guess Caine kinda rubs off on all of us. Roman’s big into cooking too. While my father taught us to fight and be men as a way to be feared and respected. Our mother taught us to be men in a way that we can, not only self-sustain ourselves, but also take care of our partners.
You don’t know this but our mother is Greek, and family is a big part of her culture. She’s always made sure we honor her side as much as we do our Russian blood.
“What’s her name? Your mom.” I’m curious of the woman who raised and created this man, that I’m quickly, falling in love with each day.
“Iris, after the flower.” He smiles as he talks about her. “She means the world to me. Taught me how to be vulnerable in my feelings.” He places the diced onions onto the heated pan and starts to caramelize the onions before throwing the tomatoes in.
“I was really lost after losing our sister. I blamed myself, felt there was more that I should have and could’ve done.
My mother was grieving too, she had just lost her little girl, and here she was trying to make me feel better about the situation.
Teaching me how to manage my feelings. Made me feel safe in them, taught me how to navigate them. ”
I take in what he’s saying, “And your father?” I place the noodles in the boiling water followed by a pinch of salt and splash of olive oil.
“My father taught me how to feel and channel my feelings too.” There a darkness that crosses his features as he speaks on his other parent.
“He taught me feeling my pain is showing weakness. Taught me that what I thought was pain was child’s play, and if I wanted to feel real pain, he would show me real pain.”
He mixes in some cream and chicken stock into our sauce and stirs it in, then turns the heat to simmer. His eyes glaze over as he tells me the next part.
“I was thirteen when I found my sister,” he says as he starts chopping some fresh basil I had grabbed, “At first I thought she was just resting,”
chop, chop, chop.
“She loved taking baths, adding bath bombs and salts, she said it helped relax her. The lights were dim so I didn’t see it at first.”
chop, chop, chop.
He’s lost in the memory. I can hear the pain in his voice, even though he won’t show it.
His father made sure to kill any semblance of weakness from him.
He feels, I see it in his eyes, the pain he keeps hidden away.
Masking it and instead turning it to rage and unleashing it when he fights.
But he won’t allow himself to be vulnerable.
“When she wouldn’t respond I got nervous, and when I stepped closer,” he stops chopping, “that's when I saw her and what she’d done. Her body unmoving, tears in her eyes. We had a fight earlier that day, and I still hate that my last words weren’t kind.
It was only six months later, that my father made me have my first fight against one of his men.
I lost obviously, I had no idea what I was doing after all.
Roman had to stitch me up. But I enjoyed the pain that came with fighting, and it brought me peace of mind, if only for a little while.
I was addicted after that, and in a way I’m thankful for the lesson he taught me.
It’s unconventional sure, but it’s what I needed. ”
My breath hitches, with the thought of my own story. I was lucky though wasn’t I? Thoren had found me just in time and I was saved. The scars on my wrist a painful reminder. I bring the cuffs of the hoodie over my hands as I try to cover them, with shame.
He grabs my hand, and slides the cuff back up to show my wrist. “Don’t do that, you don’t have to hide from me.” He places a kiss over the white reminder. “It’s a part of your story. You don’t have to be ashamed. Don’t hide, never with me.”
A timer goes off letting us know the pasta is done. He flips off the burner and strains the water. I go to grab the plates for us but he stops me. “No, you go sit, I’ll bring it you know.” He places a kiss on top of my head.
As I get to his dinning table I notice its set with four placemats, “You expecting someone else?” Just then I hear the front door open and two familiar voices ringing through the space.
“I got the crew coming in tomorrow to replace the table top.” Voice one, Roman.
“Have them call Stacie, she’s opening tomorrow and will let them in.” Second voice, Caine.
“Oh, Princess, I’m home,” Caine sing songs as they both round the corner, “ahh man that smells amazing,” Caine glances at me, “Bestie!” He makes his way to the table where I’m seated, completely bypassing Eryx.
Eryx makes eye contact with him from the kitchen, chefs knife pointed at him, “Watch it,” he dead plans, but there’s no threat behind it. It’s all love.
Roman greets Eryx and heads to the fridge pulling out a beer.
“What are you guys doing here?” I ask.
“Family dinner, we do this twice a week,” Caine takes the seat next to mine and pours us some water from the pitcher already at the table. “Smells amazing in here.”
“Family dinner?” I shouldn’t be here interrupting them like this. I got to stand but his voice stops me.
“Sit.” He commands.
“Your family now princess.” Caine winks at me, then leans in to whisper to me, “We got plans tomorrow, you and I. Ready for those piercings?”
“Wait really?” I can’t even hide my excitement.
Eryx walks over to the table two plates in hand, Roman behind him with two more. They set our plates down and its looks absolutely delicious. “What are you plotting over here?” He side eyes me.
“Oh nothing,” I give him my best mischievous smile.
“Wow this sauce is amazing, Moms recipe?” Asks Caine.
“Look at your bestie,” he playfully mocks. “She made it.”
“Came out good, maybe better than his,” Roman speaks now.
Conversation picks up amongst them and I just take it all in. Family dinner, being around them, their playfulness. It feels nice. It puts a smile on my face. The rest of the dinner goes on like normal. When we’re done, Roman and Caine collect the plates and start cleaning up.
“Wait I can help—” but I’m cut off by Caine.
“We got it princess, house rules, chef cooks, and we who did nothing clean up.”
Eryx leads me back to his room, and I sit on his bed watching him, he’s leaning against the wall, eyes hooded.
“What’s got you smiling?” Eryx asks me.
“This. You. All of you.” I look to the closed door. “This is nice, I haven’t had a family dinner in a long time. Thank you for including me. For everything today.”
“You’re everything, I don’t need an excuse or a reason. I want you here. But if you really want to thank me,” he stalks closer to me. “Take off that hoodie.”
I get up, take the hoodie off, letting it fall at my feet. He places a soft kiss on my lips then lifts me up so my legs wrap around him. Takes the covers from the bed and lays me down, but remains between my legs, “I want to feel all of you.”