6. Cohen
Cohen
“Here’s her bag—diapers, wipes, extra onesies, burp cloths.” Ava slipped the strap over my shoulder as I held Ellie close to my chest. “Here’s about thirty pouches of breast milk and her bottles.”
Seems excessive.
She placed the second bag on my other shoulder, then tipped her head back, hands on her hips. “I think that’s everything?”
“Ava. You do realize—except for the breast milk—I already have all of that here, right?” I crossed the kitchen and set the bags on the island before I toppled over with my daughter still in my arms.
“Oh. Right. I forgot.” She waved a hand in front of her face. “Mom brain.”
She stepped closer, brushing her fingers softly through Ellie’s dark hair before pressing a kiss to the tip of her nose.
“I know how to take care of my daughter,” I said, nudging her toward the elevator with my free hand. “Go. Have fun. Stop worrying. Seriously, go.”
Ava was heading to Primrose Hill for the day to ride horses at her sister’s place.
She was nervous about leaving Ellie for more than a couple of hours, but I’d reassured her—approximately five hundred times—that Ellie would sleep through most of it.
This was one of my few days off, and I wanted to spend it with my daughter. Alone.
After the mistake, slip-up, or whatever the hell Ava had called it, things between us had returned to their regularly scheduled programming. Her walls were as high as ever, and I respected the boundary. I had to. I also made more of an effort to keep things separate when it came to time with Ellie.
It wasn't like I wanted anything serious, but seeing the regret etched across her face as she called what happened between us a mistake bothered me more than I wanted to admit. If it were up to me, we’d ease some of the stresses of new parenthood together—with our clothes off.
So what if we had incredible sex? That didn't have to mean anything more...
except that we should be doing it more often.
Ava put her hands up. “Fine. I’m leaving. I love you, sweet Ellie girl,” she called over her shoulder as the door shut behind her.
Finally.
I exhaled and looked down at Ellie. “Sometimes your mommy drives me fucking batshit crazy,” I cooed.
Ellie smiled—probably gas, but I chose to believe it was because I was hilarious.
I grabbed one of her bottles from the bag full of baby gear deposited on my counter. After pouring some breastmilk into the bottle, I used the bottle warmer Ava had gotten for my place. I settled down into a chair with Ellie in my arms, and she happily took her bottle.
I loved these moments—just her and me.
She had a habit of wrapping one of her tiny fingers around mine as she ate, and it was always in that moment that I felt like I was exactly where I was meant to be. Her long eyelashes fluttered shut as she slipped into a milk coma. I pressed a soft kiss to her forehead.
I’d never imagined myself as a father. Never thought I’d have kids. But being her dad felt as natural as breathing. And somehow, she made everything feel… right.
After I got Ellie settled down for yet another nap, the elevator chimed.
I padded down the hallway from her room. I swear to God, if Ava was already back, I was going to lose my mind.
I rounded the corner and found Walker James standing in my kitchen instead.
“The fuck are you doing here?” I grinned as we locked hands and pulled each other into a hug. “I forgot I gave you a keycard.”
Walker flashed it, waggling his brows. “Figured it was safe to drop by unannounced since my perfect niece is with you.” He headed straight for the fridge, popped it open, and grabbed a beer. “Otherwise, trust me—I would not risk walking in on you fucking some random girl.”
“Ha. Ha. Very funny. So why are you in Austin?” I grabbed a beer for myself.
“Farrah’s riding horses with my sisters, then they’re all going to lunch. Plus, I wanted to catch the game tomorrow. Watch you suck ass live and in color.”
I narrowed my eyes. “You sure you don’t want to stick around and work out with us too? That retirement weight’s starting to settle in, old man.”
Walker punched me square in the shoulder.
Fuck, that hurt.
I rubbed it, already sure it would leave a mark.
“You and I both know I still look good and could clock ninety-nine in my sleep, you dickhead.”
“You started it.” I took a pull from my beer.
He grinned. “I know. What’s even better is I know you won’t do anything about it since you got my little sister pregnant.”
I rolled my eyes damn near into the back of my head. “I thought we were past this, James.”
He chuckled as he made his way to my couch, turning on SportsCenter. “I’m just messing with you.” He leaned back, eyes on the TV. “In all seriousness, Jordan—you’ve impressed the hell out of me. My sister’s lucky she has you. You’ve really shown up.”
I hadn't realized how much I'd needed to hear those words from him.
His approval hit me harder than I expected.
There was a time when I worried I'd fucked up our friendship beyond repair. After a lot of time spent groveling and keeping my word that I’d take care of his sister, we slowly repaired our friendship. I was damn grateful for that.
Sometimes I wondered if that was my hang-up. The reason I stayed away from the women I usually spent time with. As if I couldn’t juggle showing up for Ava and maintaining my previous lifestyle.
“Aww, that’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me, buddy.” I joined him on the couch and squeezed his shoulder affectionately, trying to pull him into another hug. He twisted out of my grip and shrugged me off.
“You’re an annoying little shit, you know that?” he grumbled.
I grinned—and he sucker-punched me again.
Motherfucker, he’s strong.
“Listen. I’m not sorry for how I reacted when I found out, because that hurt, man. But… I really appreciate you keeping your word and looking out for her. Looking out for them.”
I glanced down at my beer, spinning the bottle between my fingers. “Yeah, man. I’m sorry I went behind your back. But I can’t say I’m sorry for what happened.” I tipped my head toward the hallway. “Because the best thing that’s ever happened to me is asleep in that room.”
The moment Ellie came into this world. The second she was placed in my arms, I knew it. I felt it in my bones. This all-consuming, overwhelming emotion that this was my purpose, she was my purpose. I’d never been more terrified in my life, and somehow I’d never felt more certain either.
Walker nodded once. “I know the feeling.”
I knew Walker was referring to Hadley—Farrah’s daughter, now his stepdaughter.
He and Farrah had been high school sweethearts, but they’d broken up after college when he was drafted to the Aviators.
She’d wanted a life of her own, one that didn’t revolve around baseball, and it had wrecked him when she walked away.
Nine years later, after Farrah had married another man, had a kid, and gotten a divorce, they’d found their way back to each other in Primrose Hill while Walker was rehabbing his elbow from a pitching injury.
I’d never seen my best friend happier.
“And then I told your daddy, don’t you dare touch her—she’s off limits,” Walker cooed as he booped Ellie’s nose.
“And did he listen? No. No, he didn't. But that's okay because now I have you, my sweet angel baby.
" He snuggled his face into her neck, making her smile.
"Uncle Walk loves you!" He kissed her forehead.
I shook my head at my ridiculous friend and finished washing the bottle I’d just fed Ellie with. Ava had been gone for about four hours, and I’d already gotten about fifteen texts. I assumed she only took a break when she was literally riding a horse.
As I set the bottle down on the drying rack, I glanced over at Walker, who was still smothering my daughter. "So. When are you and Farrah going to start popping out some kids?"
Walker froze. Eyes wide. Way too guilty.
I tilted my head, confused. "Did I say something wrong?"
He shook his head nervously. "Nope. No. Nothing wrong."
I narrowed my eyes. "Then why did you just get all twitchy?" It took a moment for it to register. "Dude! Is Farrah pregnant?!"
He dropped his head back on a groan, staring at the ceiling. "Shit. She's going to kill me."
"She is pregnant!" I rushed over, wrapping him and my daughter up in a hug.
He shoved me off with his free elbow. "You can't tell her you know! We were planning to tell everyone together."
I pinched my thumb and forefinger over my lips. “Vault.” I grinned. “Damn, man. That’s so awesome. Congratulations. I’m really happy for you guys.”
He bounced Ellie gently, a wide grin spreading across his face. “Thanks, Jordan. I’m really excited. We just found out the gender, too.”
He looked proud as hell, and I loved to see it.
“We’re having a boy.”
I clapped his shoulder and squeezed. “Another little James pitcher in the making. That’s badass.”
Walker nodded enthusiastically and pulled his phone from his back pocket. “Check out the shit I just bought him.”
He handed it to me, still refusing to let go of Ellie.
Honest to God, the man had already bought his unborn son baseball equipment.
Trouble: Can I FaceTime Ellie before lunch?
I pulled up FaceTime and tapped Ava’s name.
I glanced at Walker. “Hey, your sister wants to see Ellie before lunch. Gimme my baby.” I made grabby hands at him.
Ava’s face filled the screen, smiling wide the second she saw Ellie being handed over by her brother.
“Hi, my Ellie girl!” she cooed. “Are you being good for your daddy and Uncle Walk?”
Ellie smiled.
Ava sighed happily. “I love it when she smiles.”
“How was riding?” I asked, bouncing Ellie gently.
Her navy eyes lit with excitement. “It was great! Addison’s got this new gelding she let me jump a little.” She let out a contented sigh. “I’ve missed it. Between the pregnancy and then having Ellie, it’s been almost a year since I’ve been on a horse.”
From what Walker had told me over the years, Ava was an accomplished rider. Where Addison was a professional, Ava was a very talented amateur. I’d never seen her ride, but I always thought it’d be cool to watch someday.
I’d never told her that, though.
“That’s awesome. You know, anytime you want to sneak away to go ride, I don’t mind handling Ellie. Especially in the off-season.”
Ava nodded, smiling. “Thanks, CoJo.”
Walker snapped his head toward me with a smirk and mouthed, CoJo?
I shook my head at him. Don’t start.
I brought my attention back to Ava. “Well, nothing crazy going on here. Ellie’s just hanging with the guys, watching her favorite show.”
“You have SportsCenter on,” Ava deadpanned.
I grinned. “I know.”
She rolled her eyes. “Well, I’ve got to get going. The girls are already inside waiting on me. Farrah said there’s something she wanted to tell all of us.”
Walker shot off the couch and stuck his face next to mine in the screen. “She what?!”
Ava’s brows pinched together. “She said she wanted to tell us something. Why do you look all twitchy?”
“He does, doesn’t he?” I egged her on.
“That little traitor,” Walker declared.
I dropped my head back in laughter.
“Traitor?” Ava’s confusion only grew.
“Your brother may have leaked some information to me earlier.”
She scoffed. “Of course he did. That dude can’t keep his mouth shut to save his life. Worst secret keeper ever.”
“Okay, first of all—rude. And second of all, I’m great at keeping secrets. I never told anyone about that time when you were fifteen and laughed so hard during a movie, you peed your pants, and then tried to cover it up by spilling water on yourself.”
Ava groaned. “You just told Cohen. Right now.”
“That doesn’t count!” Walker pointed at Ellie. “Anyway, the baby leaked it.”
Ava placed her hand on her chest, feigning offense. “I know you did not just blame my perfect angel!”
Walker stomped back toward the couch, mumbling something about Farrah being in trouble when he got home.
“Just let Farrah tell you,” I said, chuckling as I glanced over at Walker pouting on my couch.
Ava narrowed her eyes. “All right. Fine. Well, give Ellie a kiss from me, and I’ll be home around five.”
Home.
That word—from her… yeah. It felt too good.