Chapter Forty-Five
LAUREN LOOKED TOWARD the western horizon that had already swallowed half of the setting sun and sighed. Her last full day aboard the Veritas had passed in exactly the same manner as the three previous days: much too quickly.
The throaty rumble of an outboard engine drew her attention toward the stern, and her breath caught at the sight of Grey expertly steering the small craft toward her. Grey was an absolute vision with her windblown hair and toned physique, and Lauren felt her heart stutter as she looked at her.
Knowing that leaving was the right decision did little to ease the ache that settled squarely in her chest, and Lauren shook her head as the urge to stay swept through her.
She had been the strong one the night before, thinking rationally, doing the smart and mature thing, but it had not been easy.
She had lain awake all night in the safe haven of Grey’s arms, letting her tears fall silently to her pillow as she wondered where she would find the strength to actually go back to New York.
She lifted her hand in greeting as Grey killed the dinghy’s engine and drifted toward the Veritas, and felt her stomach drop at the pained smile she got in return. The day had not been easy for either of them, and she knew that Grey was thinking the same thing she was.
Their time was almost up.
Lauren folded her arms over her chest as she watched Grey tie the dinghy’s bow line off to the cleat by the dive platform, and tried to force a small smile when Grey started up the stairs toward her. “Hey.”
“Lauren,” Grey sighed as she stepped onto the back deck. Her stomach twisted violently at the pained expression on Lauren’s face, and she shook her head as she pulled Lauren into her arms. “Come here, baby.”
The day had been long, and Grey tried to console herself with the idea that watching Lauren walk away the next morning would not be goodbye—but that did little more than take the worst of the sting away.
Because no matter their promises to call, email, text, and Skype as much as possible, the fact remained that, after tomorrow, Lauren would not be aboard the Veritas with her.
Lauren melted into Grey’s embrace, which was far gentler than any they had shared all day, and her heart broke a little bit more as she buried her face in the curve of Grey’s neck. God, I am going to miss this.
“Shh, I know.” Grey rubbed Lauren’s back gently. “It’s okay.” She blinked back her tears and leaned her cheek against the top of Lauren’s head. “It’s okay.”
“What time do you have to go back and pick them up?” Lauren mumbled into Grey’s neck.
“They’ll call. I have a feeling it will be late since this is their last night in the islands.”
Lauren sniffled and lifted her head to offer Grey a watery smile, and her stomach dropped when she got an identical smile back. “Good.”
The sight of Lauren’s tears made Grey’s spill free, and she swallowed around a lump in her throat as she pressed a tender kiss to Lauren’s forehead. “Please don’t cry.”
“I can’t help it,” Lauren half-laughed, half-sobbed, feeling like an idiot because she had been the one to insist that she return to New York. “I just…”
“I know.” Grey’s voice was just as rough as pulled back and took Lauren’s hands in her own.
She tugged her toward the salon, and was relieved when Lauren followed her.
A feeling of peace swept over her when she closed the cabin door behind them, and she sighed as she pulled Lauren into her arms once more.
It felt so right to hold her, and she wanted to do nothing else for the rest of the night.
She brushed her lips over Lauren’s ear and whispered, “Cuddle with me?”
Lauren traced Grey’s jaw with her fingertips and nodded. “Of course.”
Grey toed off her shoes and climbed onto the bed, and smiled sadly when Lauren did the same. “Come here,” she whispered as she drew Lauren into her, wrapping her arms around her waist and holding her close.
The feeling of Grey’s arms around her was instantly relaxing, and Lauren curled herself around Grey’s side.
She rested her head on Grey’s chest, and let the slow, steady beat of Grey’s heart calm her.
She sighed softly at the feeling of Grey’s fingers stroking lazily up and down her spine, the touch so gentle and reassuring, and she let her eyes drift shut as she selfishly took the comfort Grey was offering her. “That feels good.”
“Good.” Grey brushed her lips over Lauren’s forehead and, on her next pass, slipped her fingers beneath the hem of her shirt. “Is this okay?” she asked as she stroked the soft skin of Lauren’s lower back.
“Yes,” Lauren breathed. She licked her lips and let her left hand, which had been splayed across Grey’s stomach, drift beneath the brunette’s shirt as well. “This?”
Grey closed her eyes at the feeling of Lauren’s fingers tracing the line of her right oblique and sighed. “Absolutely perfect.”
“Good.” Lauren turned her head to press her lips to the underside of Grey’s chin.
One kiss became two, and she whimpered when Grey shifted and the brunette’s lips landed lightly on her own.
The kiss was achingly tender, and she pulled back with a gasp when Grey’s tongue flicked across her lips.
Grey’s eyes were swirling with so much emotion that it stole the breath from her lungs, and she could not hold back the quiet groan that rumbled in her throat as she gave herself over to it.
Grey melted into the bed as Lauren rolled more fully on top of her, the redhead’s hand inching up her stomach until her fingertips tickled the underside of her breast. “Please,” she whispered, arching up into the touch.
“You’re sure?”
“Yes.” Grey covered Lauren’s hand with her own and pulled it higher.
A shaky breath escaped her at the feeling of Lauren’s palm dragging over her nipple, and she nodded, answering the question she could see shining in Lauren’s gaze.
She wanted this. Wanted her. It might be the thing that broke her completely, but she needed to fall apart under Lauren’s hands one more time before she watched her walk away.
The next few months before she could make it up to New York to see Lauren again were going to be hell, and she wanted this memory to help her through them. “God, Lauren. Please touch me.”
Lauren’s heart thudded heavily in her throat at the desperate edge in Grey’s voice, and she moaned softly as she squeezed the breast under her hand. “Okay.”
They undressed each other slowly between languid kisses, fingers trailing lightly over warm skin as they gave up all pretense of control and lost themselves in the moment.
Every touch burned with a depth of affection neither was willing to voice, but it was conveyed all the same in the soft sighs that tumbled from their lips.
Lauren’s head fell forward, her forehead bumping against Grey’s as long fingers pushed slowly inside her, and she immediately mirrored the touch, thrusting swiftly into the wet warmth that waited for her.
Her heart fluttered at the feeling of Grey’s body drawing her in deeper, and she moaned as Grey’s free hand curled around the back of her neck and pulled her down into a kiss that was so deep and passionate that it made her head spin.
It did not take long for their bodies to fall into the easy rhythm that was theirs and theirs alone, and Grey gasped as her heart skipped a beat at the feeling of Lauren’s fingers filling her so completely.
She opened herself to the woman above her, taking all that Lauren had to give and giving all of herself in return.
She matched Lauren’s slow, deep thrusts stroke for stroke as they eased each other higher and higher, and she groaned when the white heat of impending release began to spread through her. “No. Not yet.”
“Yes,” Lauren encouraged softly, dusting the lightest of kisses over Grey’s lips.
“I’m not ready.” Grey squeezed her eyes shut and threw her head back against the mattress, straining against the traitorous euphoria building inside her.
She wanted more, wanted more time to commit the feeling of Lauren’s fingers inside her to memory, to burn the feeling of Lauren’s body rocking against her own into her brain so that she would be able to remember every last detail without any effort at all. “Not yet.”
Lauren’s smile was sad as she brushed her lips over Grey’s chin. “Sweetie…”
“Please, Lauren,” Grey whispered, rolling her hips away from the hand between her legs, trying to lessen the sensation building inside her.
She cried out softly as it instead sent bolts of electricity arcing through her.
She clung to Lauren as release swept through her without her permission, suffusing her body with pleasure even as her heart broke all over again.
“I know,” Lauren whispered, nuzzling Grey’s cheek with her own as she cradled the brunette to her, her eyes squeezed shut against the truth they could no longer ignore. “I know.”