CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
The dress was simple this time.
I stood in my room at the loft, studying my reflection with a troubled expression.
I didn’t exactly have access to the clothing at Court, and I wasn’t about to ask Laurie for handouts, so I’d gone shopping in Denver.
I had found a small boutique with gowns that wouldn’t cost me a month’s rent.
The one I’d chosen was a sleeveless green satin, with a layer of golden flowers and a deep V-neck.
The train was made of tulle, and there was a long slit that showed glimpses of my bare leg.
If this were a human event, I’d be fine. But it was a coronation at the Unseelie Court, and this dress would make me the laughingstock of the fae. Luckily, I didn’t really care what they thought—it was Collith who I wanted to look right for.
I’d even put on the sapphire he had given me when we were mated.
That night seemed like a lifetime ago. My last memory of the necklace was when I’d taken it off during Viessa’s coup, using it to humiliate Collith and break his heart.
Maybe wearing our sapphire to the ceremony tonight was bad luck, instead of the new beginning I thought it was.
I touched the jewel with my fingertips and watched my frown deepen.
This made sense, didn’t it? This was the next, inevitable part of our story. Collith and I loved each other, and he wasn’t the same male I’d ruled with before. I wasn’t the same person, either. We had learned from our—
Emma appeared in the doorway and cut my thoughts short. My gaze flicked to her in the mirror. I lowered my hand and quickly pasted a smile on my face. “Oh, is he here already? I thought I had a little more time.”
Emma smiled back, but there was a shadow in her eyes. “I haven’t seen Collith yet, don’t worry. Someone else has stopped by to see you, though. I left him standing in the driveway, since he was adamant about not coming up.”
My awareness sharpened. “Who is it?”
Her brows lowered. “You know, I forgot to ask his name. I’m sorry, dear. I’ve been testing some new product.”
Moving in a blur, I turned my back on the mirror and made a beeline for the nightstand.
Emma watched without comment as I hid multiple knives beneath my dress.
Human visitors tended to text before they showed up, which meant there was something supernatural standing outside.
The battle had established that I had allies in the shadow world, so it could be a friendly meeting …
but I was still a Nightmare, which meant there was always danger.
Power attracted power. I still had plenty of enemies, too.
“Fortuna.”
Emma so rarely used my full name that I drew up short at the sound, and I paused in the doorway of the stairwell. “Yes?”
“About tonight,” she started, but then Emma stopped.
Hesitation was unlike her, too. I was starting to feel true concern when Emma said, “You know, I used to think that happy endings included another person. But lately I’ve come to realize that we can still have happy endings with or without someone to share it with.
There are many different kinds of love, and I was so focused on what I knew that I almost missed the others. ”
She paused again, and remorse shone in her eyes. “I pushed you toward Collith because I thought you were just afraid to want him. But … if your heart is telling you something, Fortuna, it’s all right to listen to it.”
“Thanks, Ems.” I pursed my lips to hide how they trembled.
As I tried to think of what to say, I realized I didn’t want to talk about this.
I wanted to be with Collith, so I’d made my decision.
I gestured toward the stairwell behind me.
“I should … I should see what this visitor wants. And then I need to go. Collith will be here any second.”
Emma nodded. “Are you sure you don’t want me there?”
“No,” I said quickly. Too quickly. But the thought of small, frail Emma entering a room full of fae made my stomach churn. I gave her a reassuring smile and shook my head. “The Unseelie Court isn’t a safe place for humans, trust me.”
“Okay, then. Good luck.” Emma smiled back. “Not that you’ll need it … Your Majesty.”
I turned away to hide my wince, taking my coat off the hook.
When I got downstairs and opened the door, I spotted him immediately, standing exactly where Lyari liked to whenever she was waiting on me.
It was the last person in the world I would’ve expected to seek me out, and I stepped outside cautiously, meeting his unfathomable gaze across the driveway.
Nuvian Folduin.
“What do you want?” I said, but there was none of my usual bite when I talked to him.
The faerie didn’t answer. He stood there for so long, in fact, that I normally would’ve gotten annoyed or said something, were it not for the look on Nuvian’s face.
But I recognized that look. I knew the pain he was feeling.
So I stayed silent and waited. For a few seconds, the only sound between us was the scrape of a leaf as a breeze dragged it away.
When Nuvian finally spoke again, his voice was raw, as if someone had ripped all his armor off.
“I got caught in the tide of battle. I looked away, just for a few seconds, and then she was … I didn’t even …” Nuvian stopped, his throat working. “I was hoping you’d …”
“You want to know how she died,” I said softly.
Nuvian’s eyes met mine, and he nodded once, jerkily, the abrupt movement unlike his usual grace. I couldn’t bring myself to deny his request, however much I disliked this faerie. But what was the right way to tell him? What would Viessa have wanted me to say?
Buying myself some time, I walked past Nuvian—he moved out of the way quickly, as if touching me would burn him—and leaned against a tree trunk.
The ridges of the bark dug into my palms. I fixed my eyes on the ground and thought about the friend we’d both lost. Our shared grief was something I never could’ve predicted a few months ago.
“You know,” I said quietly, “getting thrown in the cell next to Viessa’s was one of the best things that ever happened to me. I’ve never had a friend like her. Someone who could get me to dance and laugh, even when there was nothing to celebrate. Especially when there was nothing to celebrate.”
“She was like that for me, too.” Nuvian’s voice was soft with remembrance.
“I’m guessing you already know that she faced Lucifer.
What you don’t know is how much she surprised him.
Viessa took on the devil himself without any hesitation, and where most warriors would’ve been pissing themselves, she was absolutely fearless.
Like, it didn’t even occur to her to back down, you know?
” I shook my head slightly and felt my lips curve in a soft smile.
But then my smile faded. I realized that I couldn’t tell Nuvian exactly how it had ended.
He didn’t need to know about that awful moment or the terrible pain.
All he needed was the truth. I met his gaze and said, “Viessa Folduin fought like a queen, and she died like one, too.”
Nuvian’s face shifted toward the horizon. The golden strands in his locs caught the light and shone on the planes of his perfect, hardened features. “I never wanted it,” he said. “If I’d had my way, the two of us would’ve slipped away from Court a long time ago.”
His words made my eyebrows rise. We had something else in common, this faerie and I.
Both of us had chosen this life for the sake of someone we loved.
I wondered how things would’ve turned out if he’d gone down a different path.
For some reason, my mind picked that moment to remember what Consuelo had said to me at the end of our last session.
You could choose yourself, for once.
A moment later, I felt it. The familiar, telltale prickle that told me Collith was near. It didn’t make sense, since there was no mating bond between us, and he wasn’t part of the Shadow Court. Some things, I thought as I turned, were simply unexplainable.
He was standing there, just as I’d known he would be. I walked toward him, and my voice was soft as it floated through the stillness. “Hi.”
Collith smiled. “You look beautiful.”
“Thank you.” I mustered a weak smile for him before I turned back to Nuvian. “Are you coming?”
“No. I won’t be returning to Court,” he answered, nodding at Collith. As Collith nodded back, I realized a conversation must’ve taken place between them already. A Guardian could only leave their post if they’d gotten approval from the king or queen.
“Then I guess this is goodbye,” I said to Nuvian.
“I suppose it is.” The faerie bent in a stiff bow and turned to leave. But then he paused, as if he’d heard something or had a thought. After another moment, Nuvian moved his head. He kept his gaze fixed on the ground as he said over his shoulder, “She loved you, too.”
My throat worked, and I watched him disappear into the trees. After a few seconds, Collith stepped closer and touched my waist. “Do you have everything you need? We should go. My guards are waiting for us just beyond the trees,” he said.
He had guards again. Because that was part of the deal when you became the king and queen.
I nodded silently and started walking toward the trees, as we had a hundred times before.
We walked all the way to the Door tucked away in the dusk-tinted forest, as we had a hundred times before.
We made our way through the tunnels and down to the throne room, as we had a hundred times before.
Then we reached that towering set of doors, as we had a hundred times before.