Chapter 55
The camp falls quiet when I walk in. Whatever they were discussing, I was clearly at the heart of it. So much for subtlety.
‘So,’ Benny says baldly, ‘how about this weather we’re having?’
Caz cracks a smile.
Ruben ignores Benny, his attention solely on me.
‘You okay?’ he whispers. ‘Do I need to beat him up?’ he adds with a nod towards Kyor.
A sad chuckle rises from me. That Ruben still thinks he could manage to beat up Kyor is adorably delusional. Although, maybe with Kyor’s busted shoulder it would be a far more even match than the prince would like.
‘I’m good,’ I tell Ruben. ‘Just a lot to unpack, that’s all.’
He nods in understanding.
A few minutes later, Ruben moves towards the tree line when Fen appears, half-carrying and half-dragging a deer carcass behind him.
‘Any chance you want to help me with this one, Ben?’ Ruben asks.
‘I don’t know. Any chance you want to offer me goodnight hugs as well as morning ones?’
Ruben rolls his eyes. ‘You know, you repeatedly asking that comes across as desperate.’
‘And?’
Laughter crackles from Ruben as Benny pulls himself onto his feet and ambles across to him. As the wolf drops the carcass, I reach out to him, still feeling acutely embarrassed about the whole thing. Warn me next time you’re going to get frisky with Elska.
You have no door for me to hang a sock upon, he shrugs. That’s what I did with Zelle.
The visual of the huge wolf delicately hanging a sock on a door handle is enough to make me snicker.
Happiness and contentment wash over me. Fen’s, not mine.
It’s nice. One of us should be happy at least.
Any remaining irritation I may have had with him fades away, but sensing it probably requires another conversation to clear the air, I head over to Kyor.
‘So that’s another new thing for me to get used to,’ I say. ‘Mating wolves.’
‘Yeah, I guess it’s harder to tell when … well …’
When we want to rip off one another’s clothes anyway? I’m pretty sure that’s what he was going to say, so I nod in agreement, not trusting myself to give any more of an answer.
‘Well, I told Fen to warn me next time, and he told me he used to hang a sock on Zelle’s door.’ As I chuckle once again at the absurdity of the remark, I expect him to do the same, but instead his brows pinch.
‘What do you mean, he told you?’ He frowns.
I blink. ‘He just, you know, told me. Spoke to me. In my mind. Like Elska can do with you?’
Kyor shakes his head slowly. ‘Rose, I told you. It doesn’t work like that. Elska and I communicate with images, feelings. Not actual words.’ He looks at me wide-eyed. ‘You can speak … with words … to Fen?’
I baulk. ‘Could Zelle not?’
He blows out a breath. ‘Fuck. No. No one can.’ The worry in his eyes deepens. ‘This has to be linked with your Torailian heritage. Rose, I don’t know if you should be sharing this with anyone. All these powers… I worry about people knowing.’
‘Except those in the circle of trust,’ Loch says loudly, gesturing to the group. ‘You can share anything with us. We’re your circle. Lucky Rose to have a circle. Rings within rings, just like Wrohelm. We will need them when he’s free.’
The last thing I can deal with at this moment is Loch’s babbling, not when I need answers. Still, I send him a warm smile for his support – as odd as it is – before I block out his continued mumbles and reach out to Fen. Why didn’t you tell me it was weird that we could talk?
You did not ask, he sniffs back.
Why would I? I didn’t realise I was different. Again!
Different is not bad. I do not feel talking with you is a bad thing. I am pleased by our development.
A warm female mind touches mine. He really is. He wouldn’t stop going on about it. Rose and I this. Rose and I that. He’s very proud of you. It’s adorable. Almost as cute as when he ripped into those Torailians.
A gasp shoots uncontrollably from me. Elska!
Yes?
Why can I hear you? Can you speak to Kyor now?
No. Regret tinges her voice. And as for why, I do not know, but it seems only fair that my mate is not the only one to have such fun.
I gape at Kyor’s wolf.
‘You’re speaking to her.’ There’s no jealousy in Kyor’s voice, just wonder. ‘You spoke to her, with words? And you can tell her things? Like how much …’ He falters. ‘Like how much I love her.’
A gruff laugh resonates from Elska. There’s no need to tell me what he asked of you. I can feel it with him. I can always feel it within.
I’m sure he knows that, I reply, but he wanted me to tell you he loves you all the same.
I have loved him from the first kick to the commander’s shins, she relays back. Perhaps longer still.
I turn back to Kyor, still struggling to believe that it is not my mind playing tricks on me.
‘She says she loved you from the first kick to the commander’s shins,’ I tell him. ‘Perhaps longer still.’
His jaw is slack. ‘It was terrible fighting. Dirty. Scrappy. But I refused to let Zelle win. And she remembers that?’
‘Apparently so.’
‘Fuck.’ His attention is no longer on me as he strides over to Elska, throws his arms around her – mindful of his injured shoulder – and murmurs something I’m careful not to hear.
My eyes feel hot at the sweetness of their emotional moment, and I’m absurdly pleased that I helped facilitate it.
The Gods know, Kyor’s had precious little love in his life. He deserves more.
Benny rubs his chin. ‘Important question. Can you ask them if they’re judging us? Because I don’t like the idea of being silently peer-reviewed by apex predators.’
‘Oh we’re all judging you, Ben,’ Ruben says coyly. ‘Every one of us.’
‘Yeah, but you’re not exactly a predator are you?’ Benny shrugs.
Ruben pauses mid-gutting the deer, raising a bloody knife. ‘You really want to say that to a man with a blade in his hand?’
‘Depends. Will you tend to my wounds after you injure me? I could manage a couple of stitches, depending on where they are of course.’
‘You never give up, do you?’ Ruben laughs.
As the boys continue their easy flirting, Caz, Thessa, and Stide sit close to the fire, its flames snapping softly as sparks curl into the night air.
I’m looking at the group when suddenly I frown. Something is wrong with Stide. Even in the firelight, she looks drawn, her skin too pale, a faint sheen of sweat clinging to her brow.
She is wrapped in her cloak, yet her shoulders hunch as though the warmth cannot quite reach her.
‘Stide, you okay?’
As I move across to talk to her, she lifts her head slowly, as if the effort costs her. Her eyes are glassy, unfocused, and when she speaks, her voice lacks its usual strength.
‘The Rose. I feel … cold.’
The word jars. The air is freezing – it’s almost certainly the coldest night we have encountered so far – but she is layered thoroughly and the fire is blazing.
Yet she still shivers, teeth catching faintly as another tremor runs through her.
And it’s not just the shiver. Now that I’m paying attention to her, it’s clear that she’s swaying slightly, sweat beading on her brow as she blinks repeatedly.
Almost as though she is struggling to focus, as if the world will not stay still. The heat of the flames paints her in gold and shadow, but it only seems to emphasise how wrong she looks. Feverish. Fragile. And very much not herself. Stide is indomitable. Not frail, never that.
‘Hey.’ I walk over and touch her forehead, only to snatch my hand straight off her. ‘Oof. That’s a wicked fever you’ve got. Let me get you something to lower it.’
I scramble around my saddlebags to find a potion I had the forethought to take from Mother’s supplies. Fevers go hand in hand with infections, so it seemed like an essential tonic to carry with me.
‘How long have you been feeling like this?’ I ask as I pour out a spoonful of the tincture.
‘A little while,’ she responds vaguely.
‘Well, tell me if you’re not feeling any better in an hour or so. If this doesn’t work, we’ll need to try something different.’
Her teeth are fully chattering now, but she manages a small nod as she pulls her red cloak even tighter around her.
As I move away to rinse the spoon, Thessa speaks to her fellow Sanning. ‘Why didn’t you say you were feeling unwell?’
‘You were talking to Caroline. I did not wish to interrupt.’
A warmth flurries within me. Stide has never come across as the most amiable of travelling companions, but there is no doubt she has been of help to us on this trip, especially when it came to the v?tte.
It’s equally clear that she feels deep affection for Thessa, always guarding her, always fetching her food.
I’ve often wondered what the relationship between the two of them is, as Stide seems completely aware that there’s something going on between Caz and Thessa. Though how she feels about that, I’m not quite sure.
Thessa’s brow crinkles. ‘I always have time for you, Stide. Always. Next time, tell me.’
‘As you wish.’
As the pair shift a little closer together, Caz shuffles awkwardly.
Leaving them to their own dynamics, I take the tonic back to my bag, only for my eyes to catch Benny’s en route. A smirk flickers on his lips as he makes the symbol of the triangle with his fingers, and for once, it raises the tiniest of chuckles in me.
Ruben is quick to thump him on the arm.
Benny winces. ‘What was that for?’
‘You know what it was for,’ Ruben replies.
‘Because you can’t keep your hands off me, but aren’t ready to admit this insane attraction between us?’ Benny offers, quirking his lips into his ineffably charming grin.
With a roll of his eyes, Ruben looks at me. ‘How exactly did you end up being friends with him?’ he asks.
‘Slim pickings,’ I reply, although my attention is already back on the women in the group.
I never once saw anything between Thessa and Stide that made me think they were anything other than good friends, but then again, I know how easy it is for that line of friendship to blur, as I suspect it may be beginning to blur between Benny and Ruben.
The jovial flirting could be nothing more than harmless teasing, but I’ve spied a few speculative, lingering glances on both their parts.