11. Bristol
“Is Seth coming by for lunch again today?” Audrey teases as she leans over the front desk.
“Maybe.” My cheeks pink slightly, causing Audrey to giggle. “He said something about having to head to Ace Hammer this morning, so he might not have time to stop by.”
It’s been about two months since Seth came back into my life and to say that things have changed would be an understatement. My normal schedule usually involved lunch with the girls, work, and taking care of Rebekah, but ever since Seth and I reconnected, I’ve had to add him to my routine. Between the sweet text messages that have not turned into phone calls, I talk to him more than my best friends, and that’s saying something. Recently, he has taken to stopping by Nurture Space at least once a week for lunch.
“I have an in over there, so if you want me to make a call so your man can come to visit this afternoon…” Her voice trails off just as my phone chimes on the desk. “Why do I have the feeling that’s him?”
I roll my eyes at her before grabbing my phone and heading to the break room in the back to read my text message in peace.
Seth
Hey beautiful. I got done earlier than expected. Still want to have lunch with me?
Bristol
Aren’t you lucky? I still have one more class this afternoon.
Seth
Aww, I was hoping you could play hooky, but I’ll settle for lunch. You in?
Bristol
Of course!
Seth
Thank goodness! I thought I was going to have to beg. I’ll grab some sandwiches from Just the Drip and be there in about an hour.
Bristol
Sounds good! See you soon. X
“Why in the hell did I add that?” I mumble to the empty room, instantly wanting to unsend the message.
Seth and I have been getting to know each other more and more with each passing day, but I still haven’t worked up the courage to tell him about our little girl. I know most people would think I’m being heartless, but I never believed I would see Seth again, and now that he’s back in town, I honestly don’t know what to say to him. “Hey, you have a daughter,” would seem like an obvious choice, but it’s not that easy.
“Because you’re gone for this man but aren’t ready to admit it to yourself.” The sound of Leia’s voice causes me to jump in my seat, dropping my phone on the floor.
Why the hell does she have to be so perceptive? I want to snap back at Leia and tell her she has it all wrong, but that’d be a lie. I want Seth Williams. I want him just as much, if not more than I did when I met him over a year ago, but that scares the shit out of me. I have a huge life-altering secret that I need to tell him on top of trying to figure out whatever this is between us without causing us both a world of hurt. And I’ve been hurt enough to last a lifetime. I’m not about to put myself in that kind of situation again.
“Jesus, woman. I swear you need a bell tied around your neck or something.” I groan, leaning over to grab my phone.
“I made more than enough noise coming in here. You were so focused on your phone that a bomb could’ve gone off in here and you wouldn’t have heard a thing.” Leia snickers, giving me a one-armed hug before dropping into the seat beside me.
“It wasn’t that bad.”
“I wasn’t even in here and I can say with certainty it was,” Audrey comes strolling into the breakroom, Selina right on her heels. “Now, what am I agreeing to?”
“That Bristol is gone for Seth.” Leia raises her eyebrow in my direction, daring me to disagree with her.
“Yeah, that’s a given,” Selina replies, walking around the table and taking the seat across from me.
“I agree, too,” Audrey says as she takes a seat on my other side.
“Thanks. I’m glad to know that you all have an opinion on my relationship.”
Leia leans back in her chair, wiggling her eyebrows. “A relationship, huh?”
“OMG! We aren’t teenagers anymore.” I reach up and pinch the bridge of my nose, quickly losing my patience with my friends.
“Maybe, but I live with two of them. I have an excuse.” Audrey holds her hands up in surrender. “But seriously, if you aren’t in a relationship with Seth, then what do you call it?”
“Friends. We. Are. Friends,” I respond, punctuating each word with a nod of my head.
I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t attracted to Seth. Attracted might not be the correct word to use, but I’m going to roll with it. I had expected that we’d have dinner that first night. I’d tell him about our daughter, and we’d find some way to co-exist with each other, but that’s not what happened at all. The idea of there possibly being something more between us never crossed my mind. But when his lips pressed against mine that first night, all rational thought went out the window. I reach up and touch my lips, remembering his against mine. The way his body pressed against mine reignited the fire burning deep inside me.
“With benefits,” Selina snickers, causing me to roll my eyes, just as the sound of the bell above the door sounds. “Speak of the devil.”
“Will you three behave for once?” I grumble, pushing back from the table and heading toward the front of the studio.
“What would be the fun in that?” Leia shouts loud enough for me to hear, followed by peals of laughter.
“Hello, ladies,” Seth says loud enough for them to hear.
“Hello, Seth,” they all respond in unison, causing me to roll my eyes.
“What are you? Charlie’s Angels?” I grumble before walking past him and out the door. “I thought you said you’d be an hour?”
Seth smiles sheepishly at me, his eyes darting between my friends. “I really wanted to see you, so I asked Vance if I could head out a little early.”
“He’s so adorable,” Audrey squeals, clutching her hands to her chest.
“Why don’t we eat outside? It’s a nice day.
“Sounds good to me.” Seth smiles as he places a hand on the small of my back, leading me toward Just the Drip. “I’m sure they won’t mind us stealing a table.”
I smile up at him before motioning toward the bag in his left hand with my chin. “It’s still pretty early, and you did already buy us sandwiches.”
“Thanks for having lunch with me today.” The deep baritone in his voice soothes the ache in my heart as he steps beside me, bumping my shoulder. “I missed you.”
“Thanks,” I say awkwardly and wince.
Of all the ways I could’ve said, I chose that one? I don’t know what it is about Seth that fries my brain. I’m usually more articulate and have my wits about me. I have to, especially with a little girl to take care of. But with Seth, all my responsibilities fade into the background and so do most of my brain cells.
“I mean it, you know.” He sighs, tipping his head up toward the sky. “I don’t say things I don’t mean. If I tell you that instead of lunch, I’d love nothing more than to throw you over my shoulder, carry you back to your house like a caveman, and show you how much I want you to belong to me, I mean it.”
I freeze, and my eyes widen in surprise as he takes a step closer to me, his scent enveloping me and drawing me closer to him. I would love nothing more than to give in to the urge to raise up on my toes and allow him to wrap me in his warm embrace and bury my nose in his chest.
“But I won’t, because I need you to trust me. I need you to know that I want so much more from you than just a quick fuck. I want everything.”
“How do you know I don’t trust you?” I try to act nonchalant about it, but I know deep in my soul he’s right.
If I trusted him, I would’ve already told him about our daughter. I wouldn’t still be keeping this secret from him. I also would know exactly how I feel about him, no longer allowing my fears to have a vise grip around my heart that tightens every time he tells me how he feels. I want to believe him; I do, but there’s a piece of me that wonders if he truly means it.
“It’s your eyes,” Seth cups my cheek in this palm. “I can see that you’re holding something back from me. A piece of yourself you want to protect from being hurt. I can see it in the way you move around me, the way your smile doesn’t always reach your eyes, but I’m not giving up on you or us. I have faith that someday soon you’ll understand the depth of my feelings for you.”
Fuck me. No one besides my mom can read me that well, especially someone I barely know, but he sees it all just by looking into my eyes. His words have stripped me bare, showing the deepest parts of my soul to a stranger, and that’s terrifying.
“Don’t be scared, Bri.” Seth leans forward, running his hand along my arm and threading his fingers through mine.
“Okay.” My breath hitches slightly as he leans forward and brushes his lips against mine.
I’m lost in his eyes as we stare at each other. The magnetic pull between us grows stronger as my gaze flicks back and forth between his lips and eyes.
“You’re a dangerous creature, Seth.” I groan as he steps away from me and pulls me toward an empty table.
He pulls a chair out for me, and I take a seat, my eyes locked on him as he makes his way around the table and sits. I peer at him, discreetly checking him out. Seth looks pretty much the same as he did when we first met. His eyes are still the same warm chocolate brown color, although he’s slightly more muscular than he was. His smile still makes my insides melt just a little when it’s directed at me. His voice still wraps around me like a warm blanket, making me feel safe and protected.
And still the exact opposite of me. On the outside, I hope I portray the picture of calm, cool, and collected, but inside, I’m a jumble of nerves, barely hanging on by a thread. I need to keep my wits about me when I’m around him. But that nagging voice in the back of my head keeps reminding me I’m keeping a secret from him. A secret that could ruin everything.
“Are you listening to me?” Seth chuckles, leaning forward and pressing a kiss on the tip of my nose.
A shiver runs down my spine as our lips connect, his hand sliding down my arm, before he winks at me and places a sandwich on the table in front of me.
“Since you weren’t listening, you get the turkey and cheese.”
“Okay.” My cheeks heat as I drop my head, not wanting to see the smug look on his face as I unwrap my sandwich and take a bite.
“How many more classes do you have today?”
“One. Today is Audrey’s half day at the studio.”
“So, you schedule a lighter class load so you can get out earlier?”
“Yes, we have one day a week with only a few classes. Audrey and I take turns on who teaches the afternoon class. Today is my turn.”
“Interesting. I love how you two balance each other. I can’t imagine how much you worked before Audrey moved here,” he responds, taking a bite of his sandwich. “I’m sure Audrey enjoys having some free time to spend with Connor and the girls.”
There it is. The perfect chance to tell him why Audrey moved to Tyson’s Creek. To tell him how much help she has been since I had our daughter, giving me a chance to be the best mother I can to our little girl, but I don’t. It’s like the words are clogging my throat, so I swallow them down and plaster a fake smile on my face, hoping he doesn’t notice the change in my mood.
“Why are you asking so many questions?”
“Because, to me, you’re the most fascinating person in the world. I want to know everything about you.”
My mouth drops open as my brain seems to short-circuit for a few moments. For the first time in years, I’m speechless. This is an odd feeling because I always have a snarky retort or sarcastic comment for someone, but right now, my mind is completely blank.
If this was anyone else, I’d give him a hard time for trying so hard. That his poetic and flowery words are useless. That he’s trying way too hard for another chance to get into my pants, but instead, they give me butterflies in my stomach. I can feel deep in my bones that he means everything he’s saying to me with his heart and soul. And that is terrifying.
I clear my throat loudly, pointing toward the empty wrapper sitting in front of him. “Are you finished with that?”
“I sure am,” he winks at me, trying to put me at ease. “Let me grab yours, and we can head back to the studio, unless you want to take a walk with me?”
“A walk sounds good, actually.” I force a smile onto my face as he pushes back from the table and heads toward the trash can.
I can’t keep doing this to either of us. I need to figure out a way to let him know about Rebekah. I can’t keep lying to him. I can’t continue to be afraid that he will reject her. I would love to think he wouldn’t, but we barely know each other. Even though he seems like the same person I met over a year and a half ago, I could be wrong. And I can’t take that chance because my little girl’s happiness is at stake.
“Ready to go?”
I nod my head before gripping Seth’s hand and allowing him to pull me down Main Street, away from Nurture Space.
There are a few mom-and-pop stores lining this side of the street, but not many. There’s a park at the end where my mom and the girls take Rebekah if I’m teaching a class. Thankfully, I know she’s almost three hours away at my parents’ house. I usually leave her with Emersyn during the week, but she has a test to study for. When I was talking to my mom over the weekend, she insisted on spending some quality time with her favorite granddaughter. I didn’t want to point out that Rebekah is her only granddaughter, but I gave in. I hated the idea of being away from Rebekah for so long, but with Seth back in town, maybe putting some space between him and our daughter is a good thing.
“What made you decide to move to Tyson’s Creek?” Seth asks, his eyes focused in front of him as our arms swing slightly between us.
“I’ve always wanted to live in a small town. Being a military brat, we almost always lived in big cities with thousands of people. It never felt like a community, a place where everyone supported and cared for each other.” I smile softly as we reach the entrance to the park. “That’s what I felt the first time I came here to visit with Leia. Everyone asked her how she was doing, with warm smiles on their faces. Almost everyone knew each other, and they welcomed me with open arms. I’ve never had that before.”
“I know exactly what you mean,” he mutters, resting his forehead against mine. “That’s exactly how I felt the first time I laid eyes on you.”
A shiver runs down my spine as his nose runs along the shell of my ear before he inhales deeply.
“You don’t mean that,” I duck my head slightly.
A soft moan escapes my lips as he bites down on my earlobe, nibbling lightly, threading his fingers into my hair, and angling my neck to the side, trailing light kisses down my neck.
“What did I tell you?” he whispers as my eyes flick up to see if anyone is watching before focusing back on his face.
“That you never say anything you don’t mean.”
Releasing my hair, Seth tugs my body towards him. “That’s right.” He groans, brushing his lips against mine.
Unable to control the feelings swirling in my body, I lean forward, pressing my lips softly against his. Both of us moan as he grips the back of my neck, pulling me tighter into his body. He dominates our kiss, nipping and sucking my lip between his before thrusting his tongue into my mouth. I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him closer to me. Nothing but pure, unadulterated desire courses through my veins.
But as quickly as it starts, it’s over, and we break apart with a gasp.
“Why don’t we head back to the studio before I take you right here in front of everyone?” Seth chuckles softly before planting a kiss on my forehead.
“Yeah. That’s a good idea.” I unwrap my arms from around his neck and put a little more space between us. “I have a class to teach, after all.”