35. Chapter Thirty-Five
Chapter Thirty-Five
Then
We drove for hours.
The first entrance ramp we came across was heading southbound, so that was the direction we went. It was late in the afternoon by the time we decided to pull over in Savannah, just over the Georgia state line. We got burgers and shakes from a drive-thru and then sat in the parking lot, eating on the tailgate like we would back home.
“Did they call?” I asked Theo when I saw him looking at his phone. He shook his head, and my shoulders slumped in relief. I hadn’t heard from my family, either. I figured they were still preoccupied with things at the store, which was fine by me.
“So what’s the plan, Sass?” He took a slurp of his milkshake. “We ever going back?”
I turned my face up to the sun, letting it beat down on me. The sky was clear and bright blue—odd, since it felt like a giant gray cloud had followed us all the way from Amity. “What if I said no?”
I was so busy basking in the sun that it took me several seconds to realize that he hadn’t responded. When I looked over, he was staring out at the road, and my stomach dropped like a lead ball.
“What?” I asked. “You want to go back?”
Theo exhaled. He flicked his dark eyes over to me. “I don’t know. I have enough in my bank account to last us maybe a month—if we lived in the car.”
“We can find work.”
“Without our birth certificates or social security cards?”
I knew he was right and shoved my burger in my mouth so that I didn’t have to admit it. We'd have to go back eventually—to what, I didn’t know, but our parents would be looking for us, and Theo needed to take his place at UNC. We couldn’t drive around aimlessly for the rest of our lives.
“I have no idea what the hell is going to happen with our parents and the store,” he said, “but we’ll have each other, Nina.”
“But what if we don’t?” I burst out. Anger surged through me at the memory of what we had overheard earlier. “You heard my mom. The things she said about you. I’ve been telling you this entire time that she couldn’t find out about us because I wouldn’t be allowed to see you. It’s obvious she knows and is willing to stoop real low to stop it.”
Theo’s jaw ticked, and a bead of sweat slid down the side of his neck. He stirred the straw around in his milkshake. “You don’t think she might have been right?”
I stared at him. “Right about what?”
“Maybe I shouldn’t be with you right now.”
If I’d thought my world was knocked off its axis this morning when we stood in the hallway and listened to our families’ business implode in real time, it was nothing compared to this. I was absolutely blindsided and completely taken aback that Theo, of all people, would be rejecting me.
I set my food to the side, no longer hungry. My fingers curled over the edge of the tailgate, anchoring me, and I stared at him in disbelief. “You want to break up?”
He shook his head sharply. “No. No, of course not. But maybe we should just...wait. Until you’re out of high school and out of the house, and we can do what we want without worrying about Kelly.”
“And what do you think it would be like in the meantime? We’d go back to normal?” I challenged. “If we go back, Theo, I’m not going to be allowed to see you. Ever. And if the store does close and my family moves, or yours does, there won't be any sneaking around or knocking on my bedroom window in the middle of the night.”
Theo watched me, looking torn. I needed something to do, so I gathered my hair up and off my neck, securing it with the band on my wrist. “I can't be without you, Theo.”
I almost got it out smoothly, but my voice broke on his name, and then he was in my space, hauling me close with one arm while the other gripped my cheek. He angled my head so that he could look right into my eyes. “You think I want to be without you, Sass?” he asked in a tone that managed to be both soft and fierce. “After an entire lifetime that’s revolved around you, you think I want to just let that go?”
I took a shaky breath. “I don’t—”
“You know that year we were together in Mrs. Everett’s class?” he interrupted, moving his mouth over mine—not kissing, just letting his words wash over my lips. “All I ever heard was ‘Theo, stop staring at Nina. Theo, Nina is fine. Theo, let Nina worry about herself.’ I know you don’t remember any of that, but my parents will tell you. It was the main topic of the parent-teacher conference.” He stroked his thumb across my birthmark. “I’ve never known how to leave you alone. But I also love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone else, and I don’t want to be the one who takes you from your family or sets you up for a shitty future. Someday we’ll have our life together, honey, but it’s not time yet.”
As if on cue, my phone began to buzz in my pocket. I disentangled myself from Theo and pulled it out with the tips of my thumb and forefinger, as if it were a bomb ready to go off. The word Mom jumped out at me.
Theo made no move to intervene. He watched me as I watched the screen, both of us absolutely frozen until the call went to voicemail. A few seconds later, my phone vibrated with a text: Where are you?
I turned the phone out to show Theo. He grimaced as he read the message. “Guess they noticed,” he said dryly.
“Yeah.” Keeping the phone turned in his direction, I pointedly held the power button down until the screen went black. “Too bad I’m not telling her anything.”
“Sass—”
“What?” I threw my hands in the air, forgetting that I still held my phone. I barely managed to tighten my grip before it went flying. “What, Theo? You know my family. Why the hell would I be in a rush to get back there so I can get yelled at and locked in my room until the end of time?”
He let out a loud sigh, as if dealing with me was more than he could take. As we’d grown older, we had developed this dynamic where I was the risktaker and he was the voice of reason. It worked for us. We balanced each other out.
Right then, though, I wasn’t in the mood for practicality. I couldn’t stomach the idea of facing my parents and learning which of them had drained the store’s account. I would have to deal with what was going on back home eventually, but not yet. Not when I was two states away with miles of open road ahead of me.
I hopped off the tailgate and snatched up my black crossbody bag. Inside was everything I had with me—wallet, lip gloss, claw clip, earbuds. It sure wouldn’t get me very far. “I’m not going back,” I announced. “But you have a safe drive.”
I turned on my heel and stomped off across the parking lot, my bag thumping against my thigh. I was determined not to look back at Theo. I wanted him to chase me. To reassure me that he’d never leave me alone. I wanted to be more important to him than the sensible, responsible option.
I was a few feet away from the sidewalk and starting to lose hope when I heard my name. The knot in my chest loosened, unraveling completely when I heard Theo jogging up behind me.
“Okay, okay.” He put himself in my path, hands on my shoulders. “Come on. We don’t have to go back.”
“Really?”
“Yes. Just let me tell my parents that we’re together and safe,” he said, and swiftly cut me off when I opened my mouth to protest. “I won’t tell them where we’re going. But I don’t want people out searching, thinking we’re dead or something.”
“Alright,” I conceded reluctantly. “Okay. But after we text them, you turn your phone off, too.”
“Deal.”
We walked back to the truck, where we took a selfie. Theo sent it to both of his parents, as well as a message that we carefully crafted together: Nina is with me. We’re taking a road trip. Just stopped in Savannah. All good.
As soon as the text cleared, he powered off his phone and dropped it in the cup holder. I looked over at him, slouched in the driver’s seat with both hands on the wheel. He looked tired, and guilt began to creep in.
Maybe he was right before. Maybe we shouldn’t be doing this. Maybe we should just go back now, find out what had happened to the store. Face the consequences of running off. Get it over with.
I was about to voice my thoughts but stopped when Theo turned to me. He let out a breath, like he was releasing his stress, and gave me a genuine grin. I couldn’t help beaming back. All thoughts of turning around evaporated from my mind.
“Alright, Sass,” he said, turning the key in the ignition. “Vacation time.”