Chapter 7
CHAD
“Keys?” John asks, holding out his hand expectantly. I’d been planning to drive, but I don’t want to upset him, so I quickly scramble to hand them over.
“You don’t want me to drive?” I double-check. “How will I surprise you with where we’re going?”
He squints at me out of the corner of his eye. “I don’t think you understood what I meant about not liking to give up control, Princess. I don’t like other people deciding things for me, and I do not enjoy surprises. If I’m in a car, I want to be the one driving it.”
Oh. I guess that makes sense, even if I don’t agree at all.
I love surprises. I’m a big, big fan of knowing someone cared enough to plan something just for me.
But I don’t want to do anything that makes him uncomfortable or upset, so I try to readjust my vision for tonight.
We can still have a romantic evening without it being a surprise.
I got him flowers and dessert already, and that was classic romance!
Not that he seemed to particularly enjoy those things…
but I think this has still been really good so far.
John agreed to go out with me, and I’m already learning so much about him.
I get in the car, settling into the passenger seat of my Range Rover.
Sitting on this side in my own car is a little strange at first, but as I glance over at John, looking so confident as he grips my steering wheel, I realize how happy I am to be the one he’s driving around.
I could get used to this. It’s not much different from being driven around by my family’s drivers in the city, but it feels a whole lot more intimate knowing my man is the one in the driver’s seat.
He pulls out of the driveway, and I remember I never responded to him before he showered. “By the way, I was thinking about what you said earlier, and I’m totally down to try it.”
“Try what?” he grunts.
“You blindfolding me,” I remind him eagerly, and he chokes on a cough in response.
I lean over to try to hit his back with my hand, but there’s no room.
He seems okay though, so I continue. “I thought a lot about what you said while you were in the shower, and I think I might like that. The giving-up-control-to-you thing; it actually sounds really hot.”
“Please stop.”
“But I thought you said you liked—”
“Chad, I am driving,” he interrupts with that deep, commanding tone he gets sometimes that always makes me feel like I should fix my posture or something. I don’t think it’s supposed to make me feel so giddy too, but it does.
John’s so strong and confident, not to mention smart and skilled. I still can’t believe I get to spend my life with someone who’s so impressive. I don’t know how John was single, but he’s mine now, and I’m never letting him go.
He shifts slightly, pushing the palm of his hand against his dick, and it all immediately registers.
“Ohhh,” I respond knowingly. Pride washes over me as I realize I must’ve been turning him on, and that’s why he wanted me to stop. “Sorry, were you getting hard? I didn’t mean to distract you.”
But I’m not actually all that sorry. I love that he’s getting hard over only thoughts of me. My plan is working! I’m breaking down his walls already.
He mutters something under his breath, and I try to give him some time to relax. Now that I’ll see him every day, I don’t want to push too hard, but I did want him to be aware I know what’s going on.
Instead of continuing to draw attention to his erection and risk getting one myself, I connect my phone and put on music. I have no idea what John likes, so rather than ask, I decide to play my current obsession to gauge his interest—or disinterest.
He says nothing about my taste in music, though, just gives me a side-eyed glance, which I haven’t learned how to decipher as well as his grunts yet, so in my head, I’m going with “he likes it!” One more thing for us to bond over.
My smile is massive as my gaze wanders outside. This town is so different from the city, but that only makes me want to see more of it. When I’ve come to visit Blake before, we’ve mostly stayed on the farm. Now that this is going to be my home, I’m ready to start immersing myself more thoroughly.
Eventually, we pull up to the restaurant, and I realize it’s actually the one I’d planned to take us to. “Wait, how did you know I was going to come here?”
“This is the only semi-decent restaurant in town. Unless you planned on driving us even further away, this is the place to eat.”
I take in the building. The brick looks like it’s seen better days, and the sign hanging over the door could definitely use a fresh coat of paint, but it all feels so authentic, like it’s a part of the town’s history. “I love it!” I comment as I jump out of the car.
“You haven’t even been inside yet.”
I shrug. “Doesn’t matter. I love it.” I approach the front and am pleasantly surprised when John increases his pace to beat me there so he can hold the door open for me. Such a gentleman. Always looking out for me.
“Table for two, please,” I tell the hostess, a lovely older woman with red glasses and matching red lipstick.
“Ignore him, Marianne,” John mutters. I tilt my head as I look at him, scrunching my eyebrows together so he sees I’m confused, because why does he want her to ignore my request?
I thought we were going to eat together.
“We’re placing an order to go,” John insists, walking past the hostess to a counter where a teenager is standing in front of a cash register.
“You don’t want to eat here?” I pout, following him.
“Remember what I said about it being the only place in town?” he asks me quietly after accepting the menus the guy offers us. “People will talk if we’re seen eating here together, and I’m not one for their gossip.”
I blow out a big breath. “And you don’t want that getting back to Blake and Liam before their big day?
” I guess. It’s not like anyone here knows me, but he must not want people gossiping about him with me.
I wonder how true the small-town gossip thing is.
Would the people say “I saw John Sullivan eating with a handsome man with brown hair” to each other?
I’m kind of dying to know. This small-town thing already seems so fun.
I like the idea of everyone knowing each other.
I want to know them all too. Just like John knew Marianne.
Maybe this is really where I was meant to be all along.
He mumbles what sounds like “sure” in response, and I nod before glancing down at the menu.
I’m disappointed we won’t have the romantic evening I had planned, but I don’t want to distract from our best friends’ wedding either, so I get it.
We’ll just have to come back after they’re married and Blake and Liam know. No biggie.
“So what’s good here?” I ask, not bothering to look at the menu. I’d much rather have John’s opinion than read the descriptions.
John arches his brow. “Do you need me to order for you, Princess?”
“Yes, that’s a great idea,” I easily agree.
For some reason, John looks surprised by my answer even though he was the one offering, but he quickly shakes off whatever he’s thinking and turns to order burgers.
He even remembers to get mine with no tomatoes without me even having to remind him.
He’s so thoughtful, and it just proves he cares.
Especially because the only time we ate burgers together was a drunk night in Vegas.
“I’ll pay though!” I insist, handing my card over before John has the chance to argue.
He grunts, “Fine,” and when our food is ready a few minutes later, he grabs the brown paper bag.
I hold out my hand, but he walks right past me toward the door. “Do you want me to carry it?”
“No.”
That makes me smile. He pauses again to hold the door for me, and I realize he said he didn’t want to eat here because people would talk, but he isn’t exactly hiding the fact that we’re here together.
And he called me Princess in front of the teenager!
John can pretend he’s grumpy, adjusting my plans and grunting one-word answers all he wants, but he’s also holding doors open and carrying my dinner that he ordered for me. I know he cares.
I had assumed we’d go home, but John walks in the opposite direction of the car. “Wait. Where are we going?”
“We can eat up there, by the river.” He nods toward the water where a couple of old wooden benches sit. Huge trees provide shade from the setting sun, the river is flowing gently, and there’s even a family of ducks swimming around.
“Oh my God! John, this is perfect! It’s so romantic. I’ve never had a picnic in a park before. Thank you for spoiling me, Hubby!”
He stops right in front of the bench, turning back to look at me with wide eyes.
His eyes are such a cool color. More green than I had realized was even possible, and when he looks at me like that, they really pop.
“What the fuck? This isn’t romantic, Chad.
I just didn’t want to eat it in your nice car, and it’ll be cold if we take it home. ”
Oh my God, he said “home.” Not “his home,” just “home.” Ours. Our home! My heart feels so full at the reminder that I actually live here now. “It’s a perfect date, John,” I assure him as we both finally sit on the bench. “Thank you.”
He pulls out the two to-go containers, checking to see which is mine before handing my burger to me. “This isn’t a fucking date, Chad. I haven’t been on a date in ten years.”
I suck in a sharp breath. Is that why he’s so hesitant to advance things with me?
I’ve been very up-front about how ready I am to explore things physically to prove to him I am all in.
I’m actually kind of desperate for it after spending multiple nights sharing the same bed, waking up with him wrapped around me, but he’s still holding back.
I guess that explains why.
“You haven’t had sex in ten years?” I ask, the horror in my tone obvious.
“Jesus Christ, Chad. No. You don’t need to be dating someone to have sex,” he responds quickly. “There are other types of arrangements.”
Other arrangements? I tilt my head to the side, humming as I try to figure out what he means. Like a hookup? Or… “Ohh, like the people you blindfold?” I ask.
He drops his head back, looking up at the sky. “Can we just eat?”
“Sure,” I agree with a big smile. I’m hungry too, so waiting to talk makes sense.
The food is delicious, my burger is cooked just right, and the fries are perfectly crispy.
After a few minutes of eating though, I can’t hold back my questions for any longer.
Attempting a gentle tone, I ask, “So you said almost ten years, was that when your ex died?”
John freezes with his burger in front of his mouth. Maybe I should have phrased that a little better…
After a moment, he sets the food down on the bench next to him and mumbles, “I’d hoped you forgot about that.”
How could I forget? John admitted on our wedding night that he’d sworn to himself he’d never get married after his ex had passed away.
I asked him if his ex would have wanted him to be happy before reminding him of how happy I’d helped him be all weekend.
Then John realized I was right and agreed to marry me.
It was a huge moment for us. I’ll never forget it.
“How long were you two together?” I try again, determined to learn more about my husband.
Not because I’m jealous of his ex or anything—I know his past is an important part of who he is—I truly just want to learn everything I can about John.
I feel like he’s holding a lot in and carrying all of it on his own.
“No. We’re not talking about Luke.” He immediately shuts me down, standing abruptly to gather his things.
I nod, happy that I at least know his name now. “Okay, but whenever you’re ready, I’d love to hear more about him.”
John ignores my offered support, walking back toward the car, and I decide to take a moment during the walk back to make Luke a promise. I’m not religious in a church-going kind of way, but I like the idea that our loved ones who have passed might be out there somewhere, looking out for us.
Hey, Luke, I know you don’t know me, but I think we have the same favorite person.
I’m really sorry that your time together was so short.
I hope you approve of our marriage. I promise to try to make him happy.
I’m pretty great at getting him to laugh, and even smile.
I’m really proud of it actually. I’m not sure if he used to smile more, but you probably know how rare it is these days.
He misses you so much, I can tell. He’s still hesitant to embrace our relationship, but I know we’ll get there.
I don’t want to replace you. I just want to make him happy.
I don’t know if I need to say “Amen” or something; I just know I feel a little better after my promise to Luke. There’s still so much John and I have to learn about each other, but I can be patient and go at his pace.
We’re already married, so we have all the time in the world.