Chapter 5
FIVE
Hollie
Nine weeks ago
“He’s choking!” I screamed.
My feet pounded against the concrete as the shade in Cade’s face deepened to purple and his hands clawed at his throat.
Jesse’s footsteps were hot on my heels and his voice boomed. “Cade!”
I yelled. “Someone call 9-1-1!”
I ran around Cade, positioning myself at his back then wrapped my arms around his torso. Just like I’d learned, I pressed my fist into the soft flesh beneath his sternum and drove it deep with the force of my other hand. Cade reactively convulsed in my arms, his back sealed to my belly.
Jesse already had the phone pressed to his ear as he dropped to his knees before Cade.
Adrenaline pulsed through my veins, supplying calm strength. My motherly instincts were primal, fierce, sharp as a dagger, and damn it all, this little boy would breathe again if I had anything to say about it.
I gave a second thrust.
Jesse’s voice filtered in and out of my awareness as he rushed to explain our location to a dispatcher.
An airport employee stood nearby. Travelers slowed their marches into the airport, the foot traffic bottlenecking as onlookers stopped to watch in horror.
One of my daughters screamed from the truck.
But I didn’t see or hear any of them, not really.
I focused on nothing but the boy in my arms.
Jesse’s hands lifted to Cade’s shoulders when Cade started to sag forward. He pressed him back into me, holding him steady.
Time warped. Every second stretched like a lifetime. My heart pounded in my chest and sweat beaded on my brow. I lost count of the number of thrusts I gave Cade. Tears swam in my eyes as the seconds piled.
A stranger drew near, placing a hand on Jesse’s shoulder and praying out loud.
Another person stood nearby, on the phone with another dispatcher.
I knew how to do CPR but hoped it wouldn’t come to that.
“Come on!” I half grunted, half screamed. “Stay with us.”
I gave another.
It was taking too long. Too many.
Cade would black out at any moment. My brain readied for the next step—easing him onto the concrete, chest compressions, lifting the chin, rescue breaths.
In desperation, I glanced at Jesse, whose face was white, tear-streaked, hat gone, hair disheveled. His lips moved but I couldn’t grab onto his words. And then my surroundings swirled, turning into a smear of gray as tears completely blocked my vision.
They fell down my cheeks as I delivered another thrust, and then…
Cade inhaled.
I crumbled with relief.
In a flurry of motion, Jesse reached for his son as Cade wrenched himself from my grasp and collapsed into his dad. Jesse wrapped his arms around Cade and placed his forehead against his wavy auburn hair, squeezing his eyes closed as he whispered on repeat, “thank you God, thank you God.”
Cade’s first few breaths were long, wheezing, desperate—escaping on pain-filled moans. I hoped I didn’t hurt him too much. I’d lost count of how many thrusts it took, surely not as many as it felt like.
My gaze rose to the truck in the pick-up lane where my sweet girls were sitting with both the back and front doors ajar, crying their eyes out. At that moment, two on-site airport medics came barrelling out of the glass doors with a stretcher carried between them.
Even with medics at the airport, probably only minutes away, Cade would’ve been unconscious before they arrived. Life, in all its forms, was so fragile.
The thought sent a deep tremble across my body.
Maybe I should’ve asked Jesse if he knew CPR. Maybe someone stronger could’ve saved him faster. I wondered if Garrett would’ve found my immediate action embarrassing or presumptuous. I shook my head, confused by my self-consciousness.
When I stepped toward the truck, my legs wobbled, the muscles in my legs jumping and pulsing with adrenaline. My hands shook and my belly quivered. I felt light-headed and blurry-eyed as I processed what just happened.
He could’ve died.
Right here. At the airport. The night before my sister’s wedding.
Each appendage felt numb, foreign—like maybe they belonged to someone else. I forced my steps forward, offering a reassuring smile to my girls, who obediently stayed in the truck. I must’ve told them to do that, but I couldn’t remember.
A stranger who’d been watching called out to me, “Good job, Mama.”
I just nodded, barely able to summon a shaky smile.
I leaned into the truck, told my daughters what happened, dried their tears, gave them hugs, and pulled snacks out of my canvas bag.
Talking to my girls calmed my nervous system a little.
As I distributed little boxes of raisins and crackers to them, I said, “I’m going to go talk with the medics, I’ll be back, okay? ”
Even though I felt like I was encroaching on someone else’s doctor visit, I stepped up to the bench where the medics had seated Cade and Jesse.
Cade’s head rested against his father’s shoulder, a blood pressure cuff on his arm and a pulse oximeter on his index finger.
His eyes were pink rimmed and puffy, his cheeks still wet with tears.
One medic stood nearby, asking questions while the other squatted next to their equipment.
On the sidewalk between us laid Jesse’s hat.
I’d hardly registered that he was wearing a cowboy hat when we first met, but now, I could recall the cream colored hat he wore as he tipped his head back and laughed over Nora’s obsession with his belt buckle.
A smile broke into my face as I stooped to pick it up off the ground.
Immediately, the scent infiltrated my senses. It smelled like being wrapped in a hug, like pressing into someone’s neck—all body and warmth and something a little like aftershave. Human.
Everyone glanced at me as I approached, the hat clutched to my chest.
“This is Hollie.” Jesse’s words sounded like a continuation of a conversation they’d already had.
“Hi.” I said, lamely, thrusting the hat out to Jesse then quickly stepping back when he took it.
A middle-aged medic with chestnut hair and winter blue eyes and a nametag that read Suzanne looked at me. “You did the abdominal thrusts?”
I nodded. “I didn’t hurt him, did I?”
She gave me a gentle smile, the blue in her eyes warming. “Yes, but you saved his life.”
Another medic, Phil, with two full sleeves and a deep, rumbling voice added, “Abdominal thrusts hurt if you do ‘em right.”
“And with any child, asphyxiation progresses and turns fatal quickly,” Suzanne added. “He’s lucky you were here.”
Phil gave me a respectful nod. “Well done.”
Instinctively, and perhaps against my will, my gaze flicked to Jesse’s and found him gently studying me.
His eyes were green with a haunting ache woven into his irises.
Lines of concern etched across his forehead.
In a sweeping movement, his gaze took me in, head to toe.
When they landed on my face again, he gave me a grateful smile.
Phil stood and said, “Even though all of his vitals look great, we would recommend going to the children’s hospital for observation.
Especially with kids, this stuff can take a sour turn all of a sudden.
There can be lingering complications. And he needs to be scanned for trauma in his airway. Do you guys want to be transported?”
Jesse looked to me, no doubt considering that the three of us were depending on him for a ride. If Jesse and Cade went to the hospital, we all went. But if Jesse was anything like me, he would go—rehearsal or not. As a parent, I would never risk lingering complications at a remote ranch.
He said, “Hollie, I know you guys need to get—”
“Please don’t worry about us.” I stopped him. “We will go with you to the ER. That’s exactly what I would do.”
He nodded, taking a moment to think. “Are you sure?”
“Absolutely.”
On cue, an ambulance rolled up, signaling with a quick whoop-whoop for people to get out of the way.
Bright flashing lights reflected off the glass doors.
As Phil and Suzanne packed up their gear, the other paramedics popped out of the back of the ambulance.
For a few minutes, Jesse gave the new medical team the run down of what happened and Cade’s medical information was passed along.
Every thirty seconds or so, Jesse’s gaze sought me out. His green eyes left the medics and found me, a beat of impatience lacing his movements. Like he wanted to break away and come talk to me. Under normal circumstances, I wouldn’t have thought twice about this.
But, I was thinking about it quite a lot.
His intermittent regard for me sent heat barrelling into my cheeks and flustered my thoughts. When Bea called and said he would be picking me up, she told me, “Jesse is the sweetest, you’ll love him.” In hindsight, I could’ve used a heads up about how attractive he was.
He had every classic cowboy feature—exactly the sort of vibe the word cowboy conjured up in my head.
Scruffy facial hair, thick forearms, wide shoulders, a strong waist, and worn jeans that fit in all the right places.
A true man’s man. It took no effort whatsoever to imagine him lifting a lasso over his head or tossing hay bales or whatever cowboys did.
Men rarely turned my head these days, but for some reason, Jesse did.
And I found myself unable to look away. I blamed it on my curiosity; new place, new people.
But it was more than that. I could tell Jesse was an amazing father—he kept a hand on Cade’s shoulder, spoke calmly, and gave his utmost respect to the medics.
He was level-headed when he had every reason not to be.
That earned my instant respect.
The true heart reveals itself in crisis—no one can hide when they are thrown into the fire.
His gaze flicked to mine and I wrenched my eyes away, annoyed I’d been caught watching.