Chapter 21
It’s a knock on the door that yanks me from my sleep. And it’s not a delicate little knock; it’s a loud, repetitive, insistent one. Whoever it is, they’re not going away.
I check my surroundings with one eye – the other isn’t ready to open yet – and see that Jake is still fast asleep.
‘Whitney?’ Cordelia’s voice breaches the door, bright and relentlessly cheerful. ‘Whitney? Jake?’
I sit up straight. Shit! She doesn’t sound like she’s going anywhere.
Jake is stretched out on the rug near the foot of the bed, under his blanket, one arm flung over his eyes like his body has registered the daylight while he’s sleeping but it isn’t ready to get up yet.
He looks surprisingly comfortable. But of course he does, he’s Jake.
I imagine it’s easy to sleep anywhere when you’re always so laid-back.
The knock comes again.
‘Whitney? Can I come in?’
‘Jake,’ I practically hiss. I dangle over the end of the bed so I’m closer to him. ‘Jake, quick!’
He stirs, blinking up at me, as he comes to his senses.
‘Everythin’ alright?’ he asks.
‘Cordelia’s at the door, she wants to come in – quick, get in bed with me,’ I command.
‘Yeah, okay,’ he says, springing to action.
I get back in my place and Jake dives onto the bed next to me.
‘Okay, come in,’ I call out to Cordelia.
I throw the duvet over us and, at the last second, Jake scoops me up in his arms, spooning himself up behind me, his body pressed tight up against mine.
Is that… oh boy. I can feel every inch of his body against mine.
It’s like my senses are mapping out every part of him, painting one hell of a picture.
Finally he interlocks one of his hands with mine.
Now this has to look real. Even I’m low-key convinced and I know it’s fake.
‘Good morning,’ Cordelia says as she walks in.
I can feel Jake’s breath ever so gently on the back of my neck.
I don’t know if it’s my senses going into overdrive or if he’s getting closer, and I can’t help but wonder what it would feel like to feel his lips on my body.
I know, I know – but what you have to remember is that Jake is the fantasy, the dream romcom man, the one I could never have in a million years.
Andy is taken, sure, but if he weren’t then he’s the normal, safe man I could maybe see myself with.
But he’s taken and his fiancée is here, standing at the end of the bed in a floral dress.
‘Erm, why are there covers and pillows on the floor?’ she checks. ‘Is everything okay with you two?’
All that effort to get Jake into bed with me and we never destroyed the evidence of him sleeping on the floor.
‘It’s a sex thing,’ I say with a bat of my hand.
‘Oh… wow… okay,’ she replies. ‘I hope I’m not interrupting.’
‘No,’ I say quickly. ‘We were just about to get up actually.’
‘Right, well, I just wanted to let you know,’ she continues, ‘that Arty dropped by earlier. He brought fresh eggs from his hens, bread his wife baked this morning, sausages from the butcher in the village. Isn’t that sweet?’
‘Aww, that’s great,’ I reply.
‘He asked after you both,’ she adds casually. ‘I told him you were still in bed.’
While it would have been great for him to see the two of us together generally, I think it probably helps our case that it seems like we were still in bed together.
‘Well, if you’re getting up, then breakfast will be ready whenever you are,’ Cordelia says. ‘I’ll see you down there.’
And then she’s gone. I finally let out a long breath of relief, but it only makes me sink deeper into Jake’s embrace. As tempting as it is to linger, I jolt away like a reflex.
‘Sorry about that,’ I tell him.
‘Quite alright,’ he replies. ‘That was a good cover-up.’
‘Yeah, that actually worked,’ I say with a laugh. ‘Shall we go get some breakfast?’
‘I’d like that,’ he replies with a smile.
The door bursts open again but this time it’s JJ. She doesn’t knock.
‘Morning,’ she says. ‘I just saw Cordelia on her way out, so figured you wouldn’t mind.’
She plonks herself down on the bed next to me. I move up, to give her space, which only sends me towards Jake again.
‘Morning,’ I reply. ‘Cordelia says breakfast is almost ready.’
‘Great,’ she replies. ‘After that – content day! In fact, let’s start right now. Jake, take a selfie of the two of you in bed.’
‘Really?’ I reply.
‘Really,’ she insists. ‘Just… put your head on his chest and smile. How could you not?’
‘Use my phone,’ I say. ‘It’s there, on the bedside table.’
Jake does as he’s told and so do I. I place my head and my hand on his chest and gaze up at the camera. He smiles as he takes the photo. He looks almost model-like, with his bedhead and his sleep grin. He’s good at this.
Downstairs, the lodge looks gorgeous in the morning light – and the food smells great.
Cordelia is cooking. Andy is standing next to her, sipping his coffee – he’s got stuck-up hair like he always does on a morning, and he looks like he’s not quite powered up yet, like he always does before he’s had his coffee.
I know him so well; it’s such a shame we couldn’t have given things a go, to see if we could have had something together.
I’ll always love him and I’ll always wonder, but he does seem genuinely happy with Cordelia, even if she does seem a little odd sometimes.
‘You slept well?’ She greets us with a wiggle of her eyebrows. ‘Or did you not get much sleep…?’
I almost choke on the atmosphere as Andy’s expression shifts to something close to horrified.
Jake slides seamlessly into fiancé mode.
‘Sure did,’ he says, smiling. ‘Breakfast smells real good.’
‘Well, Arty did ask for you when he brought it, so we have you two to thank for this – for all of it. Don’t we, Buzz?’
Cordelia gives Andy a nudge when he’s too slow to reply.
His eyes flick to Jake. Then to me. Then away again quickly, like it’s physically uncomfortable.
‘Yeah, thanks,’ he says plainly.
JJ joins us, tapping away on her phone as she walks in.
‘Morning, lovebirds!’ she chirps. ‘We’re going to have to make this quick – we’ve got work today. Me, Whit and Jake. But that just gives you two a chance to spend quality time together.’
‘Great,’ Cordelia says brightly.
‘Yeah, great,’ Andy adds without the same level of enthusiasm.
After breakfast – which JJ photographs far more than is normal – we head outside to where JJ has set up a game of bowls on the lawn.
‘Time to frolic,’ she commands.
And so we do as we’re told. I have to admit, I’ve never played bowls before, but it’s actually quite fun.
‘You’re smilin’ for real,’ Jake whispers to me when I land an actually decent shot.
‘I always smile when I’m winning,’ I joke.
Jake wraps his arms around me from behind and sways me gently. I feel a bit like I’m inside a boyfriend simulator. Like this is the Small World ride equivalent for me as an adult. It’s like I’m inside a dream. I know, it’s not real, but I’m enjoying it none the less.
As I glance back towards the lodge I catch Andy watching us from the terrace. He looks away too quickly when he sees me, like he doesn’t want me to know that he was staring.
Is he jealous? I suppose he could just find it weird, seeing me with someone, and Jake is captivating to watch. But, I don’t know, I know Andy, and he doesn’t look happy with this.
JJ did say it would work, that it would bring out Andy’s feelings if he still had them lurking. Part of me wants to back off, to stop making him feel uncomfortable, but I don’t know, the other part of me can’t bring myself to get off the Jake ride just yet. I’m having too much fun.