Chapter 53
FIFTY-THREE
Zephyrine
I step out of the shower, wrapping the towel around me before I tread out into my room to find clothes.
I’ve been spoiled by my time at Bull Rush Ranch, the lavish main ranch house with its large showers and soaking tubs, the endless hours of hot water.
Even the little heater tank outside at the cabin was less chilly than what we have here in the convent.
It's a small sacrifice in the scheme of things. One I’ll have to adapt to again, along with all the rest. It’s a mounting list that weighs heavily on my heart.
So much so that I sat up for three hours tonight, finishing some of the work I’d left behind on my desk when Levi took me from it.
I figure it can’t hurt to get on the abbess’s good side on day one, especially if I can keep the goodwill momentum going from the relics.
But for now, I’ve got to try to get some sleep. At least a few hours before the sun comes up. Maybe then, I might not look like death warmed over when I say goodbye to Levi. A hopeful wish that disappears the second I feel a hand cover my mouth and another wrap around my waist.
“Don’t scream,” Levi whispers, his forehead falling to my shoulder. “I couldn’t sleep.”
I wrap my hand around his, and he drops it away from my mouth, letting it fall to our sides. I turn and look at him, wide-eyed and worried, a million thoughts racing through my head.
“No one saw me.” He shakes his head. “And I installed a better lock while I waited for you to get out of the shower.”
“You nearly gave me a heart attack.”
“I’m sorry for that.”
“You shouldn’t be in here. If the abbess finds out—” I shake my head.
“She won’t.” He stands by my desk, carefully examining the items lying on top of it and smirking as he picks up the aspergillum. “But if she did, would it be the worst thing to happen?”
“I don’t want a get-out-of-jail-free card. I need to make all of this up to them. They deserve more from me.” I shake my head.
“All the reasons I love you are the same ones that mean I have to lose you.” He sighs, rolling the metal rod in his hand. “Sometimes I wish you were a little less of an angel, you know?”
“You’re not losing me. You’re just putting me back where you found me.” I close the distance between us and run my fingers down his forearm. “Plus, I think we both know I’m not an angel. Unless we’re talking about the vengeful kind.” I give him a sympathetic smile, hoping it quells his doubts.
“The vengeful kind is my favorite.” His eyes drift over my face and land on my lips.
“You should go back to your room. Get some sleep,” I whisper.
“I can’t sleep without you, so there’s no use.” He leans down, his lips brushing over mine in soft strokes, giving me the briefest taste of him before he stops to look at me—a question in his eyes.
“You can’t sleep in here either. Never know what you’ll wake up to. Being tied up. Burned.” I nod to the aspergillum in his hand, and his eyes flash bright with the memory.
“Don’t tease me with a good time, sweetheart.” He kisses the side of my throat, his fingers tracing along the edge of my towel and then twisting around the ends of my damp hair. “You’re already half naked for me. Wet.”
“We shouldn’t. Not in here. It’s wrong.” I point out the obvious, like he doesn’t already know.
“That’s your favorite way to have it.” He slips the aspergillum under my towel and between my thighs, the cool touch of the metal eliciting a gasp.
He uses the wand to part me, sliding it through my wetness and letting it roll over my clit.
Each rib and rung of the metal adds a new facet of friction.
“Lev.” I say his name like a warning, trying and failing to say more.
I should list all the reasons this is a bad idea.
Why he shouldn’t be touching me in this room.
Why this shouldn’t feel as good as it does.
But I don’t. Instead, I let out a stuttered breath as he takes another pass over my clit.
I find myself burying my face against his shoulder, muting my protests, when he nudges my entrance with the tip.
“It’s okay to want it, Zeph.” He coaxes my face free from his shoulder, kissing my lips softly and breathing the words against them when he speaks again. “Just tell me how bad you want to be fucked. How much you need it to ward off the lonely nights here.”
“It’s wrong. That's for holy water. It’s—” I choke on my words as I feel him press it inside me.
He works it in and out, taunting me with just enough that I want more, then taking it away again.
My breathing’s uneven, and I lick my lips as my fingers dig into his shoulders.
My chin drops, and he kisses me again before I let out another soft gasp.
He pulls it out and rolls it over my clit, daring me to ask for more.
“Oh. Levi…” I whimper. “Please.”
“See? It feels good, doesn’t it?”
“Yes,” I cry out softly when he slips it inside again. He pulls the tucked towel free at my chest, and it falls, pooling at my feet. His hand goes to my breast, cupping it and thumbing over my nipple as I lean into his touch.
“I’ll never get over how gorgeous you are.” He leans down, sucking my nipple into his mouth, his tongue playing over the tip.
“Oh god.” I run my fingers through his hair and down his neck, letting my nails sink into his traps. He works me up, switching from one breast to the other and alternating the pace of penetration until I’m rocking my hips, desperate for more friction.
He pulls back, my nipple glistening as he kisses a path up my chest to my neck and then takes my hand, threading his fingers through mine. He brings me to my desk, clearing a space on it and turning my chair backward before he pats the seat.
“Kneel on this and bend over the desk. Elbows here. Palms here.” He points to where he wants me as I climb onto the low-back chair. I follow his lead, letting him put me into position until I’m prone and fully on display for him. He gives my ass a soft squeeze.
“What are we doing?” I breathe as I look back at him. It’s rhetorical. I know exactly what we’re doing.
We’re breaking every vow I’ve ever taken. Crossing every line I’ve sworn I would never touch. Giving away every chance I have at redemption.
“This is wrong,” I whisper. But he won’t let me think of it like that.
“Don’t they always tell you your body is a temple?” He answers me with a soft kiss to my core, his tongue teasing me with the promise of more before he pulls away. “I’m just worshiping at the altar, like any good penitent would.”
“You don’t seem sorry,” I argue as I hear the sound of his zipper dragging down, and his hand passing over his cock.
He presses the head against my entrance, hesitating for a long moment like he's enjoying the bit of torture he's putting us through before he sinks inside.
He groans, barely even trying to mute himself.
“You’re right. I’m not.” He drags the ridges of the aspergillum up my center, teasing my ass as he fucks me slowly. “Not when I’ve got you like this. How could I ever be sorry for this?”
“So wrong,” I mutter as I rock my hips, grinding my clit over the rounded edge of the desk chair, desperate for more.
“But it feels good, doesn’t it?” His hand follows the curve of my ass, and then I see him pick something up from the table. I hear the pop of a bottle topper, and a moment later, I feel a cool liquid dripping between my cheeks.
“What’s that?” I ask, glancing back over my shoulder to see him eyeing the label as he straightens his glasses.
“Anointing oil.” A wicked grin spreads over his face as he sets the bottle back down. “Perfect.”
“Levi,” I whisper his name in nervous anticipation as his thumb circles me.
“You trust me?”
“You know I do.”
“You remember how you keep yourself safe from the wolf, little red?” Amusement seeps through his tone.
“Confess,” I repeat the safe word I picked for us.
“That’s my girl. Now relax for me.” He dribbles a few more drops over me before the tip of his thumb slips in.
I curse. The intrusion feels new and tight. I tell myself to focus on his cock. How good it feels. How full I am. If I can take him there, I can take him here.
“Breathe.” His voice is calm and soothing as he massages me, sliding his middle finger in and working it slowly in and out.
He takes his time, slow thrusts of his dick in and out of me to keep me grounded while he helps me ease into the rest. “You’re so fucking tight.
I need time we don’t have. You think you could take a little more? ”
“Yes.” I want to be brave for him, so I nod my agreement, trying to catch my breath as I slip my fingers between my legs.
I need more than I can get in this position, and I want the distraction of pleasure as he tests my limits.
I circle my clit as his cock stills inside me, his finger slipping free, and I mourn the loss of the fullness I’d felt with a muted curse.
I hear the pop of the little topper again and feel the oil drip down over me. I glance back and watch him slick the narrow end of the aspergillum up to the flared base of the guard that keeps it from slipping into the pail. It’s much smaller than he is, but still more than I’ve ever taken.
“Levi. That’s—” I swallow hard.
“Wrong?” A dark chuckle rumbles free from his chest. “It won’t feel wrong. Not when we’re working you so full you can’t think straight.”
“I trust you.” I remind myself. He’d never ask me to do anything he didn’t think I was more than capable of.
“Just focus on your breathing. Slow. Steady. I’ll make it good for you,” he promises.
I take a deep breath and slowly release it as he pushes it inside me.
My heart pounds in my chest, but every inch he slips in sends a shiver of awareness down my spine.
I tease my clit with the pads of my fingers and start to move again, rocking my hips forward and backward.
I test my limits, and I hear a low groan of approval rumble out of his chest as he watches me.