Chapter 37
Tristan
The nurse shows me into Lark’s room. It’s silent except for the sounds of the machines beeping.
It’s steady, slow, and tells me she’s alive at least.
She’s so still. Lying there with her hands at her sides, a tube down her throat, and a bandage wrapped around her head.
My chest is so tight I feel as though it’s going to crack from the pressure of this moment. I take another step, and the nurse places her hand on my back. “You can go in, sit by her.”
“Is she…?” I start a question that could have many answers, and I’m afraid of each one.
I let her pick. To tell me something because I need some damn hope right now.
“She’s in a coma to allow her brain to rest.”
My breath hitches as I sink into the chair next to her. “A coma?”
“It’s to give her time to heal. To let the swelling come down without any additional trauma.”
There are moments in my life that I can recall in great detail.
When Sadie was born and the moment the doctor placed her in my arms. I remember the smell of her skin.
The sweet baby scent that filled my nose and how tiny she was.
The fear that I might break her, without even meaning to, because she was just so fragile.
The phone call when Emmy Jo was at the end. The drive from the ranch back to the house and watching her eyes find mine for that last time. Her words, the smile she forced, and the hours I sat beside her, waiting for her last breath to come.
I’ll never forget when Sadie fell off that horse. How time slowed as I watched her fall back, landing with that thud and the crunch from the bones in her leg breaking. The sounds of her screams while I tried to ride back with her as she was in agony.
Now this.
The feel of Lark’s hand, so cold as it fits into mine.
The steady beeping of the machine above me.
The balloon of the ventilator rising up as her chest inflates, then dropping as it forces the air out.
I will remember the fear, the self-loathing and the fact that she doesn’t know I’m here. That I came the second I found out.
I will never forgive myself or forget.
The nurse checks the machines and then looks to me. “I’ll be right outside if you need anything.”
“Okay.”
“Talk to her,” she encourages. “She can hear you. At least, that’s what research shows. Tell her you’re here.” She gives me a soft smile and then leaves, closing the glass door behind her.
What do I say?
I have so much I want to tell her, but she deserves to be awake for it.
I can start there.
“Hi, sweetheart,” I say softly, my voice sounding pained even to myself.
“I guess hi is a bit of a stretch, though, since you’re not awake.
I have so much to tell you. So much to say, but this just feels like I’m cheating,” I admit.
“You fell, which I guess you already know. Anyway, I’m here because I love you.
I’m here because you’re where I need to be—always.
I know I was afraid, but that wasn’t even an inkling of what I’m afraid of now.
I should’ve known, you know? I should’ve seen that you’re so much smarter than me.
That you knew better and I should’ve listened.
” I half laugh. “I’ll deny that if you do remember this conversation.
They say you can hear me, that you are listening, and since you can’t reply to anything, I guess this is my perfect opportunity to say it all.
” I rub her hand and give myself a second.
“I already told you I love you, but I didn’t tell you how much or why.
I love you because you give me hope again.
You make me believe that happiness is possible.
I love you because since you came into my life, I feel like breathing is easier.
I love you in spite of every reason we shouldn’t be together and for every reason we should.
You need to wake up again, Lark. You need to come back to me.
You need to let me love you in front of the world.
I’ll fight anyone and everyone who tries to come between us. ”
I let the tears fall, allowing the love that I feel for this woman to break free. Instead of shoving it away and pretending it doesn’t exist, I permit it to seep into my bones. Each pump of my heart lets more of it flow. Each breath fills my body with everything I’ve been denying myself.
I love her.
Against every protest, every part of me that knows what a bad idea it was, she found a way deep into my soul.
Lark Gatlin. The girl who was absolutely off-limits. The one who I never thought I could feel anything other than apathy for, owns my heart and soul.
She has to come back.
I need her.
More than I’ve ever needed anyone.
I’m sitting in the waiting room with Lark’s parents. After I came out, her brothers went in, claiming they needed to check over everything. As if I would do anything to harm her.
Assholes. Both of them.
Her father has been quiet, just looking at me, shaking his head, and then staring at his wife.
I swear I can hear the questions rattling around in his head.
After another few minutes, he speaks. “Is someone going to tell me what’s going on here?”
Her mother replies. “About what?”
His gaze moves to me and then back to her. “What do you think, Millie?”
“I’m in love with your daughter, Mr. Gatlin.”
He grunts. “Right.”
“Lark and I started seeing each other in secret, and she’s…well, she’s amazing, and it didn’t take long for me to see how wonderful she is.”
“And what about the things happening to our farm?” he asks.
“It isn’t me, but…the video did show me in the barn because we’d been together, and I was making sure Lark got back safe.
She was tired that night and upset about some stuff.
I didn’t want anything to happen to her as she went back home.
When the video came to light, to protect her from any issues that would come from our relationship, I took the fall.
However, I’m not doing anything to harm your family, sir. I can at least promise you that.”
This time he laughs once, but there’s no humor. “No harm to my family? What do you think dating her was going to do? Bring us all together?”
Her mother reaches across his lap and takes his hand. “Hush now, George. I saw the recording, and everything he says is true.”
Both of us stare at her, but Mr. Gatlin speaks first. “You saw the recording? And you…kept it to yourself?”
“Yes, because Lark was trying to fix things on her own, and you boys all have issues with rationality and the Stone family.”
He huffs. “I wonder why.”
She shakes her head with a smile. “Anyway, they fell in love, no different than you and I did.”
His eyes widen. “No different? Are you hearing yourself? He’s a Stone, Millie. A Stone.”
“And she loves him. I don’t care if he’s the Devil himself if he makes my little girl happy.
Lark loves him, and I know our daughter—she couldn’t love someone if they weren’t worthy.
Besides, he came from Ginny Hart, and that woman was lovely in every way.
Let’s just say he has more of his momma in him than his daddy. ”
In this moment, I see just how wonderful her mother is.
She reminds me of my own mother. She’d be saying the same things, shutting down the hate that has festered between our families for far too long.
Virginia—or Ginny, as everyone called her—Stone was the kindest woman I’d ever known.
She would always roll her eyes whenever my father would rant about the Gatlins.
Mom was from a few towns over. She didn’t understand the family rivalry and thought it was ridiculous.
Mr. Gatlin huffs and looks to me. “If you love her, why didn’t you come to me like a man and tell me?”
Fair question, and hopefully he will accept my answer.
“Because I didn’t want to complicate her life.
I loved her too much to cause her pain. The idea of her family taking anything out on her because of me was too much.
I wanted to protect her from it. I was willing to walk away if it meant she didn’t hurt any of you. ”
He shifts his jaw side to side and looks away. “I see.”
Mrs. Gatlin’s eyes shine with approval. “Did you know I used to have coffee with your momma every week?”
Both Mr. Gatlin and I stare at her. “No, ma’am,” I say.
“You what?” he asks in disbelief.
Her smile grows. “We would get you kids off to school on Tuesdays and then meet up for coffee.”
“Millicent?” Mr. Gatlin nearly chokes on her name. “Are you kidding me?”
She rolls her eyes and then turns to me.
“Your mother was a lovely woman. I miss her friendship. We knew we had to keep our meetings just between us for the same reason. That we had hardheaded husbands who wouldn’t understand.
While I don’t think the road ahead for you both is easy, if you love each other, I hope you’re willing to fight against all the people who will be against you. ”
“I am.”
Mr. Gatlin grunts. “Great.”
She smiles and winks at me. “Lark is worth it.”
“Lark is worth everything.”
“Good grief,” he mutters under his breath before speaking directly to me. “You better be worth it, because if you break her heart, I’ll break your neck.”
“Understood.”
I’ll never do anything to hurt her once I fix the mess I already made.