Chapter 17
The Duke of Windbourne pounded on the Duke of Rivers’ door, and it was opened quickly by a rather startled butler who then ushered him in swiftly.
“Your Grace,” the butler said, his voice pitching up.
Pierce spun on his booted heel. “Yes, that’s me.” The bottle of brandy in his hand sloshed. “Now, where’s your bloody master? He has some things to answer for.” And Pierce bellowed, “I hope you’re happy, Rivers.”
Rivers, who must have been in one of the rooms just off the foyer, strode in and then stopped dead in his tracks. “What the bloody hell is going on?”
Pierce arched a brow, then gestured to his own disheveled state. “You did this.”
“I did what?” Rivers demanded, wary.
“You arranged this wedding for myself and my wife, and now it is all a disaster.” Pierce’s throat tightened as emotions stormed through him. “She thinks that she is worth so little. And no matter what I do, I can’t make her see that she is worth the entire world. What have you done?”
Rivers’ gaze softened.
Pierce let out a shuddering breath. “I am in a wasteland while she is so blind to my love.”
Rivers took one more look at him, snatched the brandy bottle away, and handed it to his butler. “This isn’t helping. It’s making you dramatic. You are acting as if you’re upon the stage.”
“I am not. This is my real life,” Pierce countered. “And this is your fault. Admit it. You arranged my marriage. Somehow.”
“Yes,” Rivers sighed, “it is. I won’t argue with you, and you’re the only person who’s figured it out. You’re too damn clever.”
Pierce nodded. “It’s true, but not clever enough to realize that the woman that I was marrying was never going to actually love me the way…”
“What?” Rivers challenged. “The way you want? To be the kind of person that you want?” Rivers snorted. “Of course she’s not. She’s a human being, as are you. Are you going to be the sort of person that she wants?”
“I thought I knew what she wanted,” Pierce said, swaying, his heart paining him so much he feared he was about to collapse with apoplexy. “But apparently I don’t.”
Rivers glared at him, then let out an exaggerated breath. “You’re buckling at the first bloody test, man. How can you do that?”
Pierce’s jaw dropped. “I am not. I have never—” Pierce swallowed. “Wait, what do you mean?”
Rivers gave his butler a quick look.
The butler nodded, looked at the brandy bottle, then rolled his eyes, muttering to himself as he headed out to the servants’ hall.
“Right,” Rivers began. “What did she say to you? Something about her father, right? Something about working herself into an early grave and showing you how wonderful she is.”
“Yes,” Pierce declared before he scowled. “I say, were you hiding in my house?”
Rivers arched a brow. “I don’t have to. She told me something like that just before you two wed, and I’ve been worried about it ever since. And here we are now.”
Rivers shook his head. “My God, man, how could you stumble at the finishing line? All you had to do was tell her that you would love her no matter what, sweep her into your arms, and kiss her.”
“That’s not true,” he growled. “I tried.”
Rivers let out a harsh laugh. “Did you try hard enough?”
He paused. Was that his problem, that he never tried quite hard enough? His father. He’d abandoned him, hadn’t he?
“No, no,” Rivers said. “I’m not trying to say you should have tried harder with your father.
I can see that wheel ticking in your head and that’s not correct.
” Rivers blew out a long breath. “But with her? Her heart was broken. I should have seen that better,” Rivers admitted, and it clearly nearly killed him to have missed this.
“But I simply knew when I met her that you two were perfect for each other, and I refused to believe that I was wrong because I’m never wrong about these things. ”
“Oh,” Pierce drawled, even as he longed to howl with his pain. “Who’s the arrogant one now?”
“Well, I’m a duke just like you. We’re both arrogant,” Rivers said simply. “It’s a problem, but so far, I’ve matched several couples.”
Pierce sucked in a breath. “Every one of our friends.”
“Yes,” he said.
“Do they know?” Pierce demanded.
“No,” Rivers returned quietly.
“You’re lying to them?”
“Yes,” Rivers said before he shrugged. “Well, a bit.”
“A lot,” countered Pierce.
“But it’s for a good cause,” Rivers insisted. “They’re all happy.”
“Because of lies,” Pierce pointed out.
Rivers narrowed his eyes. “I refuse to apologize.”
Pierce stood silent for a moment and then he said without hesitation, “Good. Never apologize. Because you are right. They are happy, and maybe it doesn’t matter how that happiness came about, but mine?” His voice broke and he somehow forced himself to whisper, “Mine is slipping out of my fingers.”
“Then go grab it,” Rivers said, crossing to him and clasping his shoulders.
“The man I know would never be wallowing in brandy in my foyer, lamenting that his wife won’t listen.
The man I know would charge across Arabia upon his stallion and sweep her into his arms.” Rivers all but shook, but then the duke gazed deeply into Pierce’s eyes and lamented with genuine confusion, “Why do people always collapse when they are the ones falling in love? Why is it that everyone around them can see what needs to be done?”
Pierce gazed into his friend’s confused eyes and suddenly felt for the duke. He had tried to make people around him happy and couldn’t understand why people resisted so.
“I don’t know,” Pierce said softly. “Maybe we’re simply too in the middle of it to see.”
Rivers let out a pained laugh, but then he said confidently, “Well, when it happens to me, I certainly won’t have that problem. I shall see clearly as if there was not a cloud in the sky.”
Pierce cocked his head to the side. “I can’t wait to see that. Maybe I’ll arrange a match for you.”
Rivers let out a bleat of alarm. “Please don’t. Now go get the woman you love. Never give up. That’s what she needs. That’s what she longs for. Someone who will always be there. Someone who will never let her down.”
Pierce’s lips parted and he understood. He genuinely understood and he vowed, “I’ll do whatever it bloody well takes until she sees that she was always worthy. It was her father who was not.”
Rivers smiled. “Good. Now, coffee first, then ride like hell.”
The coach ride was surprisingly cold and painful, and when Nancy arrived at the estate, she had gotten out and felt a wave of such intense fear and regret that she’d almost got right back into the coach and returned to London, but she couldn’t.
She had too much to do. Her hands were trembling. Eileen ran down the massive steps of the soaring Tudor great house that was built in the shape of an E and grabbed her hands.
“I’m so glad to see you, but you look like you’ve seen a ghost,” Eileen declared as the light began to fade over the horizon and night began to settle in. “Were you accosted on the road?”
“I’ve had a fight with my husband,” she said. “I’ve disappointed him. He…” Nancy gulped, unable to finish.
“You? Disappoint anyone? Blighter,” Eileen tsked. “I’ll go down to Town and give him a piece of my mind, duke or no.”
“He wants me to work less,” she exclaimed.
Eileen stilled.
“Wait, what was this fight about?” Eileen asked as she all but dragged her into the massive house, with its dark wood beams overhead.
Eileen gave a quick and rather intense wave to Everett, who had already come down to the estate.
“Tea, Everett,” Eileen requested. “Things are unraveling.”
Ever helpful, Everett gave a fast nod.
Nancy’s thoughts rioted. They had been rioting since her discussion with Pierce. And all she could see was her father’s face. Her father telling her that she and her mother would be fine.
But they hadn’t been fine, and he had not thought them worthy of his time to ensure they were fine.
Eileen pulled Nancy into a drawing room, sat her down on one of the only available chairs, surrounded by stacks and stacks of porcelain plates painted with Chinese pagodas and furniture covered in sheets.
“Now tell me what happened,” Eileen said gently. “We shall sort this out. We sort out everything.”
It was the kindest thing anyone could have said and that somehow made it worse.
The tears welled and spilled over her cheeks.
How had she not realized how precarious she had felt in this life?
The truth was that when her father had died, they’d been one step away from the workhouse.
And it was only her work that had kept them out.
“The duke said he wants me to work less, that he wants to spend more time with me, that he’s worried about me. I worry him. That’s not supposed to happen.”
Eileen studied her for a long moment, her brow furrowing. Then she cocked her head to the side. “Well, he’s not the only one.”
“What?” Nancy gasped.
Eileen hesitated, then clearly decided on truth over platitude.
“You’re working too much and too hard and your work is showing it.
Must you be so proud? Please let us, and let Pierce, help you.
Your pride might be the end of you. It’s all right if you aren’t perfect.
He will love you, no matter what you do. ”
“What?” She gasped again. She couldn’t fathom Eileens’s words, and her own vocabulary seemed to diminish. Pride? Was that true? No. It wasn’t pride, was it? And Eileen was wrong. Surely, Pierce wouldn’t love her…
She swallowed, shoving the thought aside as she returned, “I don’t feel proud, Eileen. I fear that I am not worthy of all his help. But tell me. What mistakes have I made?”
Eilleen gazed at her with sympathy.
“There were mistakes in your accounts because you’re tired,” Eileen confessed.
Then she knelt before her and gazed up into Nancy’s eyes.
“You’re not sleeping, my friend. And I had to correct one of your letters that was meant to go to the museum.
You made a mistake in the dating of the Chinese plates.
And you had the wrong name for the director. ”
She sucked in her breath. “I never make mistakes.”