Chapter 13 Zara #2
Alfrie’s expression softens. Slightly. “I know what you meant.” He flashes a sort of smile at Emlyn but doesn’t lift his gaze from the twisted blades of grass in his hands.
I reach for the whiskey and take a gulp.
Then another. And another. Why not? The whiskey aids my confidence, and I press the bottle into Leer’s arms as I sneer at Alfrie.
“You’re pretty damn pretentious for a squire.
You should be grateful to Leer and King Hardin that you get to live in the court at Lanray. ”
Alfrie straightens, his eyes meeting mine.
He cocks his head to the side, and quirks a brow.
“You’re absolutely right, Princess. I am grateful.
You have no idea how happy I was to watch as everyone I loved got slaughtered and my home burned to the ground, all thanks to the Mighty King Jeffery.
Thank the gods I was able to leave the only life I've ever known to become a courtier in a strange place.” His eyes are fierce with a rage so raw, the tiny hairs on the back of my neck stand up.
I freeze at the sound of my father’s name. “What do you mean ‘thanks to King Jeffery’?”
“I—,” he starts, but Leer’s warning tone cuts him off.
“Alfrie.”
“What are you talking about?” I press. I catch a glimpse of movement from Alix in my periphery and look to him for answers. “Alix?” He clamps his mouth shut, and awkwardly stares down at the corner of the blanket. I turn toward Alfrie again, my eyebrows arched.
His jaw ticks and he opens his mouth to speak then glances at Leer, who has gone completely rigid, jaw clenched, as he glares unblinkingly at his squire. Alfrie shakes his head slightly and barely lifts his gaze to mine. “Nothing. I didn’t mean anything.”
Leer chuckles a little forcefully. “Alfrie, relax a bit. I’m sure the ladies were only inquiring about how we came to be…friends.” Leer takes a sip of the whiskey then thrusts it toward Alfrie, encouraging him to take a swig. It isn’t a request.
The flash of pure hatred is gone, and his green eyes brighten under the afternoon sun. He tentatively takes a drink from the bottle. “My apologies. Please forgive my outburst.” He doesn’t meet my eye as he passes the whiskey back to me.
I feel awful. “Alfrie, I—”
“Please. Don’t. I’m sorry for my poor behavior. To you as well, Emlyn.” He bows his head and stares at his hands.
“Let’s talk about something a little less grim,” Leer chimes in. “Alfrie was lucky that our soldiers came along when they did.”
I glance at Alfrie, his focus returning to looping his grass chain together.
“Yes. I’m very lucky.” There’s no emotion in his voice.
Nor on his face. He’s completely resigned to his past. I want to probe, but before I can ask more about his village or why he blames my father, Leer gets up from the blanket and pulls me up with him.
“Come. I want you to show me all of Masseda’s secrets.
” His thumb traces circles over my hand and the disturbing images of innocent Fae being brutally murdered disappear.
Leer smiles down at our friends. “Do you think I can have a few minutes alone with my future bride?” He looks to Alix for confirmation. “We won’t go far. I promise.”
I know Alix doesn’t want to agree to this, but shockingly he does. “Ten minutes.”
I mouth a thank you to Alix and wink at Emlyn as Leer leads me by the hand down the path.
A tunnel formed of lilacs and gardenia shrubs close around us over the dirt trail that follows the flow of the stream.
The sun peeks through the brambles of stems and leaves and blooms, shooting rays of light into the burrow of greenery.
Tiny fairies flit from flower to flower and sing to themselves, their voices like miniature bells as they fly around our heads.
Leer is quiet as we walk along, hand-in-hand, a small and content smile curling his lips.
His eyes dart around the grounds, taking it all in.
“It’s as if the war never came to Masseda.
Everything here is so bright and happy. Even the townsfolk seem quite content.
” He stops and holds his palm open in front of a hovering fairy hoping it will climb on.
It tentatively places a toe onto his hand then quickly flies away.
“It’s like you’re all residing in a permanent spring. ”
“The fighting was so long ago. I think those who lived here during the war and those who came after are trying to forget such a dark time ever occurred.” I think of Alix and Emlyn, who were orphaned after the Unseelie coup, and those like Alfrie, who lost everything and everyone they knew.
“Masseda was lucky, though, since my father was already on the throne. I suppose our court was decently stable when the fighting started.”
“And now?”
“You’re asking if Masseda is still stable? I guess so.” I squeeze his hand. “Can I tell you a secret?”
“Anything.” He leans into me, a slight tug on the right corner of his lips.
“My father has ruled forever, but I’m not confident that our court is as strong as it once was.
I think it’s like you said. We've pretty much forgotten that a war ever happened and sometimes I wonder if we would survive another. I don’t think I've ever even seen our soldiers go through any serious weapons training in…I don’t know how long.
Many of them aren’t even here in Masseda.
My father sent most of them all around the realm to keep watch for any movements from the Unseelie Court. ”
Leer stares ahead, his expression nonchalant. “I see. Well, then I guess it’s a good thing our marriage will unite our courts. Lanray’s army will be at your father’s disposal, and our soldiers train twice a day. You’ll see when I take you there.”
My shoulders sag. As good as it feels to be next to him with my hand tucked inside of his, the thought of leaving my home is depressing.
He must notice the change in my mood and the shift in my stance, because he pulls me to a stop. “What’s the matter?”
“Nothing. It’s just. I want this marriage to happen. I do. But. I also don’t want to leave Masseda. It’s the only home I’ve known.” I gesture to the picturesque beauty that surrounds us. “I mean, can you blame me?” I look up at his beautiful face from under my lashes.
He shakes his head, then takes my face in his hands, brushing back a strand of hair blowing with the cool breeze. “I understand. We can come to visit anytime you want. But I know you’ll love Lanray. It’s right on the coast. And there’s always a salty wind sweeping over the court from the ocean.”
There’s a sense of calm in his eyes and the feeling is contagious. My body relaxes under his gaze and his touch, and I tilt my face to press my cheek closer to his palm. “I’m sure I’ll love it too.”
He dips his chin and softly places his lips on mine, hesitant at first, then he grips my waist with an intense need, and his body presses into me.
The innocence of the kiss is gone, transformed into hunger and passion and wanting.
I fall into him and let his mouth explore every inch of mine.
My heart races and desire takes root deep within me, an ember ready to ignite into flames.
He pulls away, and I gasp, left with my hand raised in mid-air, where his cheek had been only seconds before. He shoves his hands into his pockets and steps away from me.
“Did I do something wrong?”
“Absolutely not. But I know me. And if we were to continue doing that, I’m not sure I’d be able to control myself.
Which might be frowned upon, since we’re out in public and not married.
Yet.” His cheeks are crimson, and there’s a hunger in his eyes as if he might change his mind at any moment and throw me down onto the grass to have his way with me.
Which I wouldn’t oppose.
He offers his arm. “We should get back before your bodyguard has me arrested. Besides, there’s more whiskey to drink with our friends.”
Friends. Alfrie isn’t my friend. “I’m pretty sure your squire, or physician, or whatever he is, hates me.”
Leer laughs. “He doesn’t hate you. Alfrie has some, shall we say, aggression toward royalty.
Which makes sense after what happened to him.
His entire village was wiped out just to locate and execute four Royals from Gridan.
He wasn’t raised in court like the two of us and he has no interest in our lifestyle.
He was thrown into a roll of service to courtiers because he refused to become one. ”
“Why would he refuse?” I take his arm.
“Who the hell knows? I love him as I would a brother, but he’s an enigma.
I suppose, at the end of the day, he’ll always be a Solitary Fey who prefers to hide away with his books.
One of the reasons why my father insisted he train with the healers.
” Leer leans into me. “But enough about him. I want to know about you.”
“What do you want to know?” I cock my head, a smirk playing at my lips.
He holds his finger and thumb to his chin, feigning deep thought. “Hmm. What’s your favorite color?”
I giggle. “That’s what you hope to learn most about me? Green.”
“Okay. I prefer red. That could be an issue.” I nudge my shoulder into his and he laughs, a dimple creasing his cheek. “All right, how about this. What’s your other form? When you shift?”
Oh no. He has no idea that I’m the lamest Fae to ever exist in the realm. He’s waiting for my answer and I stammer. “I. I um…I never really learned. Well, I never really had to—"
“You can’t shift.” It’s a statement more than an inquiry, but without judgement.