CHAPTER TEN The Call in the Car
Maya lasted two days.
Monday was meetings from nine until six. Tuesday she flew to San Francisco and back for a client presentation. Wednesday she worked from home, and Andre stayed home too because a contractor canceled a site visit.
There was no space for Jalen.Maya told herself the distance was good.Then Thursday morning, his name appeared on her
screen while she sat in the parking garage beneath her office.Jalen: You avoiding me?
She stared at the message.Maya: Busy.Jalen: Same thing you used to say when you were mad.Maya: I'm not mad.Jalen: Call me when you can.She went upstairs and tried to work.At noon, she checked her phone.At two, she checked again.At five-thirty, she sat in her car without starting the engine and called him.
"There she is," Jalen said."Don't sound so pleased.
""I was starting to think Andre confiscated your phone.
""Don't joke about him.""I'm not."Maya closed her eyes.
"This can't keep happening."Jalen was quiet.
"What can't?""Us talking like this. Me hiding it.
Thinking about you." "So don't hide it.""You know it's not that simple.
""It could be.""No, Jalen. You are my ex.
You cheated on me. We were toxic together.
I am with somebody good.""And you're calling me from a parking garage.
"Maya gripped the steering wheel."I know.
"His voice softened. "Why?"She looked at the concrete wall in front of her.
"Because I still feel something."Saying it aloud changed everything.For a moment, neither spoke.
"Me too," Jalen said.Maya's throat tightened.
"I didn't ask you to say that.""I know.""This is bad.
""Maybe.""Not maybe.""Then hang up and block me.
"Maya said nothing.Jalen exhaled. "That's what I thought.
""You always do that.""Do what?""Push me to make the choice you know I don't want to make.
""I'm not the one with a boyfriend."The sentence stung because it was true.Maya rested her forehead against the steering wheel.
"I love Andre.""I believe you.""Then why are you doing this?
""Because I love you too."Maya sat upright.Traffic noises echoed faintly through the garage.
"Don't say that.""Why? Because it makes the problem real?
""You don't know me now.""I know enough to know seeing you messed me up.
" "That's not love.""Maybe not. But I know I've compared every woman I've been with to you.
I know I never forgot you. I know when I saw you at that mall, I felt like somebody put seventeen years back in my chest all at once.
Call it whatever you want."Maya's eyes filled.She had spent so many years imagining Jalen regretting her that she had never considered the cost of hearing it.
"I have to tell Andre," she whispered.Jalen did not answer immediately.
"Yeah," he said at last. "You do."Maya started the car.
"I don't know what's going to happen.""Neither do I.
""And I am not promising you anything.""I'm not asking you to.
"But beneath the words, both of them knew something had already been promised.Not a relationship.Not a future.Just the possibility of one.And sometimes possibility is enough to destroy what certainty took years to build.