CHAPTER FORTY Too Late
"Maya," Andre said softly, "it's too late."The words were not cruel.They were worse than cruel.They were final.Maya looked down at her hands."I know you're married.""Then you know why.""I do.""I love my wife."Maya closed her eyes.Andre continued gently, "And I love my children. I'm
not leaving them. I'm not going to create pain in their lives to correct something from ours.
""I would never ask you to leave your kids.
""I know.""And I don't want to be the other woman.
""I know that too."Maya looked at him."Do you still love me at all?
"Andre's expression changed.For a moment, the question seemed to take him somewhere far away.
"There is a part of me that will probably always care about you," he said.
"Seven years doesn't disappear. You were my best friend.
I thought I was going to marry you."Maya's eyes filled.
"But caring about who we were isn't the same as wanting to leave the life I have now.
"She nodded slowly."You followed your heart," Andre said.Maya gave a painful laugh.
"And look where it took me." "Don't do that.
""Do what?""Turn your life into a punishment story.
"She stared at him.Andre leaned forward.
"You made a choice. It hurt me. It cost you something.
But you also learned who you were. I learned who I was.
I met Simone. My children exist because my life went the way it did.
I can't wish them away to give us another ending.
"Maya pressed her lips together to hold back a sob.
"I don't want you to.""I know.""I just wish I had chosen you then.
"Andre's eyes softened."Maybe you couldn't have.
""What does that mean?""Maybe if you had stayed with me while still wondering about Jalen, you would've resented me.
Maybe you had to see the truth yourself.
""That sounds like you're trying to make me feel better.
""I'm trying to tell you something I had to learn too.
We don't get to know the life that didn't happen.
We only get this one."Maya cried then, quietly.Andre handed her a napkin.The gesture was so familiar it almost undid her.
"I am sorry," she whispered."I know.""And I'm happy you're happy.
I really am.""Thank you."Maya wiped her face.
"Does Simone know you're meeting me?""Yes.
"Maya looked up, surprised.Andre's mouth curved slightly.
"I don't do secret conversations anymore.
"The sentence was not a punishment.It was a lesson.Maya nodded.
"Good."Andre stood."I should go."Maya rose too.They walked outside together.On the sidewalk, Andre opened his arms.Maya stepped into them.This hug lasted longer.Not long enough to become betrayal.Long enough to honor goodbye.
"Take care of yourself, May," Andre said.Maya froze at the nickname.Then she realized Andre had never called her that before.He smiled gently.
"Sorry. Wrong memory."Maya laughed through tears.
"Maya is fine.""Maya is good."He walked toward his car.She watched him go.This time she did not run after him.