CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE The Coffee Shop
Maya arrived fifteen minutes early.Then she sat in her car for ten of them, trying to slowher heartbeat.The cafe was small, bright, and familiar in the wayneighborhood places become familiar even if you have onlyvisited once.
Andre sat near the window with black coffeein front of him.He stood when Maya approached.They hugged.The embrace was brief.Still, Maya had to remind her body that it did not meanhome.She sat across from him.
"How long are you in town?" she asked."Until Sunday.
My mom had a minor procedure. She'sfine, but Simone stayed home with the kids so I could helpout here.
"Simone.The name felt strange in Maya's mouth even before shesaid it.
"She sounds understanding.""She is."Andre's face changed when he spoke about his wife.
Notdramatically. Just warmth, ease, an unconscious softeningMaya recognized because he had once looked that waywhen speaking about her.It hurt.Maya wrapped both hands around her cup.
"I owe you something," she said.Andre shook his head.
"You apologized years ago." "Not face to face.
""Maya, you don't have to -""I do. For me, maybe.
"He nodded.Maya took a breath."I am sorry for making you feel like seven years could bemeasured against a memory.
I'm sorry I lied and then triedto hide behind being confused.
You told me first didn'tmean forever, and I thought you were minimizing whatJalen meant to me.
You weren't. You were trying to tell mefirst was a position in time, not proof of destiny.
" Andre looked down at his coffee."That was a hard time.
""I know.""I loved you more than I knew how to protect myselffrom.
"Maya's eyes filled."Did you hate me?"Andre thought before answering.
"For a while, I hated what happened. I hated howreplaceable I felt.
I hated Seattle because I knew I hadmoved partly to get away from you.
""I'm sorry.""I know."He looked at her."But no.
I never hated you."Maya blinked back tears.
"Did you love her right away? Simone?"Andre smiled slightly.
"No."Maya hated the tiny spark of hope that appeared andhated herself more for having it.Andre continued, "I didn't trust easy after us.
She waspatient. We were friends first. She knew I had been in along relationship, but I didn't tell her every detail until wegot serious.
""And she stayed.""She stayed because I was available by then.
I had tobecome available."The distinction landed.Maya nodded.
"Are you happy?"Andre looked out the window for a moment, then backat her.
"Yes."One word.No hesitation.Maya smiled through tears.
"Good."She meant that too.Andre reached across the table and placed his hand overhers for only a second.
"I wanted you to be happy too.""I'm getting there.
"He nodded.They talked for nearly an hour after that.
Work. Maya'smother. Tasha. Damon's children.
Seattle winters. LosAngeles traffic. Ordinary topics layered over extraordinaryhistory.When Andre finally looked at the time, Maya felt panic.
The conversation was ending.Maybe forever.
"Andre," she said quickly.He looked up.Maya's heart pounded.There was one truth she had not said.
"I still love you."The air changed.Andre did not pull away.He also did not smile.Maya forced herself to continue.
"I'm not saying that to disrespect your wife.
I wouldnever ask you to cheat. I just...
if there is any part of youthat ever wondered whether we could try again -" Andre's face filled with sadness.Maya knew the answer before he gave it.