What To Do When Your K-9 Adopts Another Demon (My K-9 is a Demon #2)

Consecrated Ground Equals Spontaneous Combustion

You never let me fetch souls anymore! It’s always, “Retrieve the bad guy, Malachi. Release the asshole, Malachi. Go find the criminal dickhead, Malachi.” Never: “Good work, Malachi! You caught the evildoer, you brave and wonderful officer. You can eat his soul as a reward!” It’s damned degrading, I tell you. And believe me, I know damned.

“Aw, poor Malachi! He does such a good job. What’s the matter, buddy?

Chuck not taking good care of you?” one of the officers asked right on cue.

The man leaned down to give Malachi’s back a hard scratch.

Other officers murmured in agreement, shooting disapproving glares at the woman loosely holding his leash.

Suckers! Malachi gloated and grinned at Chuck, while thumping his tail on the floor like he was having the best day ever.

He woofed low and glanced back adoringly at the man who’d fallen for his ploy, solely to irritate his handler.

That right, Officer Gullible, keep rubbing down another dude without even knowing it. Dumbass.

Chuck narrowed her eyes and frowned, a silent warning to be quiet and quit distracting her. At his wheezing laugh, she reached down and pretended she was rubbing his ears fondly like she usually did. Instead, she squeezed hard, pinching the tender flesh between her thumb and pointer.

Tilting his head toward her, trying to relieve the pressure on the thin skin, Malachi groaned.

Ow, ow, ow! Dammit, woman, that hurts! Why are you so violent?

I thought you were supposed to protect and serve, not assault and maim!

He refused to whimper out loud; he wasn’t going to show anyone else a weakness.

Fighting back a grin, Chuck let go of his ear and rubbed his head gently this time, ruffling the soft, silky fur there before turning her attention back to her captain.

Jaxon, the only other person in the room who knew Malachi’s true origin, shook his head and snorted as he tried to hold back his laughter.

He had been on the receiving end of Malachi’s jokes so many times, he relished the opportunity to see him get a little punishment.

He smirked with a righteousness Malachi could never match. Not without fainting.

Yeah, laugh it up, Jaxon Byron Raifson. Want me to piss on your shoes again? Or maybe I’ll retrieve your punk ass and drag you to the drunk tank. Let the frat boys piss on you instead.

“Mal,” came Chuck’s low-voiced warning before she nudged him not very gently with her foot.

Jaxon simply arched an eyebrow, briefly flashing a smug smile as he pointed at Chuck, waggling his finger in a taunting spiral.

That’s cute; you think I can’t just pop into your apartment while you’re sleeping and shave off your eyebrows. Or draw a giant dick on your forehead in permanent marker. Don’t push me, Jaxeline.

Now it was Chuck’s turn to suppress a laugh as Jaxon’s eyes widened nervously. She tugged slightly on the leash, indicating he needed to pay attention to the captain’s words.

“With the increase in burglaries and vandalism at the local churches, it’s certainly a targeted attack on places of worship.

We will be increasing patrols around as many as we can, but with so many locations, we can’t have eyes on them all.

Chuck, I’m putting you on a special assignment with the detective leading the case.

He’s heard how talented Malachi is and he’s hoping his nose can help find something he’s missing.

I don’t have all the details on how he expects you to explain it to your partner, but I’m sure he’ll have something creative. ”

Malachi’s head whipped toward Chuck with horror burning brightly in his eyes.

He scrambled to his feet and dropped his head heavily on her thigh as he trembled.

Nausea burned up his throat, and he swallowed down the surge of vomit seconds before it expelled in her lap.

He fought back the flames of Hellfire threatening to burst free in his panic.

Churches? No… I can’t! You know I can’t!

Get us out of this! Chuck! I’m begging you!

I promise I’ll never pee on Jaxon again if you fix this. I swear it on Satan’s sweaty armpits!

“Sir,” Chuck spoke up quickly, setting a calming hand on Malachi’s head, reassuring him that she understood his concerns. “Sir, while I appreciate the trust, I wonder if you could maybe assign Ranger and Stark instead? They’re the more seasoned team; I’m not sure this is something Malachi can do.”

Chuckling, the large man shook his graying head before smiling indulgently.

“Come now, Chuck. Malachi may be the youngest, but there’s no arguing he’s the best. His track record is so impressive that other cities have been reaching out to us for our secrets.

I get requests for you two almost daily.

Even across the country. In fact, you were specifically requested for this job, and I agreed.

There’s no doubt in my mind that you and Malachi are the right pair for the job.

Now, I’m sending you the contact for the lead detective.

Go meet with him and let’s get this closed quickly before someone gets hurt. ”

With the dismissal clear, Chuck nodded meekly and stood. Not looking at Malachi, she pulled the leash for show, leading him from the room as the other officers filed out with them. Everyone had received their special assignments and were now rushing to get started.

Hurrying to a dim, rarely used hallway, Chuck crouched by Malachi, making a show of checking his K-9 vest and adjusting the straps. Her voice was barely a whisper as she tried to reassure him. “Look, I know it’s not ideal, but—”

Ideal? Malachi sent frantically, a small whine slipping from his throat unintentionally.

I literally cannot step into a church, cathedral, mosque, temple, or any other such place.

Consecrated ground, Chuck. I’m pretty sure I would spontaneously combust if I even thought about going there.

Too late! I thought about it! I’m going to explode, take cover!

He shook hard, his body quaking in fear.

If it was a little exaggerated, well, it was only to make his point that much stronger.

“Mal,” Chuck soothed as she immediately threw her arms around him, holding him close. “It’s okay, we’ll figure it out. Please, don’t be afraid. You know I’d never let anything happen to you.”

Sighing with guilt for his theatrics, he sat back on his haunches. I know… you love me too much. I’ll try it for you. I wasn’t entirely exaggerating that.

The aura surrounding her brightened with pink and gold, while her beaming smile washed over his fur like a ray of pure sunshine. Chuck kissed the tip of his nose. “I know you will. That’s my Mal-Mal!”

I’m not saying I won’t puke on you.

“Hey, what about that angel-halo-protective-shield-thingy Nick gave you? Would that maybe… I don’t know… dampen the effects somehow?”

Tilting his head thoughtfully, he replied. Good point. We could summon him and ask. Since he’s your uncle, he might even answer. Besides, it’s been a while since he started visiting Amaryllis on a regular basis and I’m dying to know how that’s going.

Digging her thumb into the bridge of her nose, rubbing between her eyes as if she was warding off a headache, Chuck moaned before thumping her head on the wall behind her.

“Please don’t say dying and Amaryllis in the same sentence.

And be nice to Nick. I know, I know. He’s an angel, you’re a demon.

You’re mortal enemies, blah, blah, blah.

But he’s… family.” She settled a hand on his back and patted gently to soften her words.

Malachi flattened his ears and glared at her before huffing in disgust. You know what? I’m always nice to him. He’s the one who always shows up with his halo glowing like a freaking searchlight from a heavenly helicopter. Maybe he should be more respectful to me!

“How about I do the summoning this time, huh?”

No fun at all, he grumbled, pawing at the linoleum in irritation.

In the privacy of her SUV, Chuck found a secluded area to park in the shade before she spun to face Malachi in his compartment.

Sliding open the partition so he could lean forward, she began tapping her fingers in a quick staccato on the seat beside her.

She studied him with a small frown, pinching her eyebrows together.

“You know, I just realized I’ve never actually summoned Nick.

You’ve always done it. How do I do it? And tell me the right way or I’ll hide your special handcuffs. ”

With a frustrated groan and narrowed eyes, he talked her through it. It’s mostly intentions, he finished lamely. I can’t believe you went straight to the handcuffs. Most inconsiderate.

“Okay, well, be quiet so I can intend for him to show up without smiting you.” A hint of laughter bounced with her voice as small streaks of pink slithered through her halo.

Rude.

“Honest.”