Chapter 7
Farrah
Ishut the refrigerator door with a long exhale that makes my lips vibrate. Whiskey meows, sitting stoically by his food bowl as if he hasn’t just finished his dinner.
“Don’t look at me like that. You’ve had plenty.”
With a tail swish, he saunters into the living room to climb his cat tower. One day, I want to build him a whole wall he can use as a jungle gym. Until I buy a house, he’ll have to make do with the small one that barely fits in my apartment.
I grab out some bread and peanut butter to make a sandwich. I could’ve made dinner, but I just don’t feel up to it tonight. My shift at Desi’s Diner this morning knocked me on my ass, and I couldn’t be bothered to do more than shower after I got home.
I pathetically eat my sandwich standing at my counter as yet another lonely Saturday night looms ahead of me. The thought of texting Gwen and Gia pops into my head, but I quickly dismiss it. I’m sure they’re both busy tonight.
I’d rather be alone than receive a pity invite to whatever they’re doing.
As I clean up my dishes, a knock on the door makes me freeze.
“Farrah? Are you home?” Gwen’s voice allows my muscles to loosen. I wipe my sudsy hands off on a towel and then open the door.
“Hey, what are you doing here?”
“I thought I’d stop by to see if you wanted to come to a bonfire.” Her grin is full of mischief.
“Right now?”
“Yep. You don’t even need to change.”
I glance at my wide-leg, flower-embroidered pants and purple long-sleeve T-shirt. I suppose it’s cute enough to be in public. “Let me grab my coat.” Without closing the door, I reach over to the counter to grab my purse, then tug my jacket from its hook on the wall.
Gwen claps her hands once we’re walking out to her car. “Do you know Grayson Reed?”
“Tall guy with tattoos on his arms?”
“Yep, that’s him. He’s friends with Holt and Gia. He sent out a mass text to everyone, inviting us all out because they need some bolstering right now. Holt’s in-laws are putting up a big stink about him dating Gia. It’s horrible.”
Holt lost his wife three years ago and is finally finding happiness again. Every time I saw him pick his girls up from school, he always looked so sad. Since he met Gia, his whole disposition has changed drastically. “I hate that they’re not being supportive of Holt and Gia.”
“Me too. I’m not sure Holt would’ve made it through losing Hannah without them. I hope they come around soon, but I have a feeling this is just the beginning.”
“Grief is such a beast to conquer. And then when you think you’ve got a handle on it, something comes up to knock you right back down.”
Gwen squeezes my arm in silent support. She knows how hard I took my grandmother’s death and the downhill slide that came with it.
We’re in her car, driving out of town, before I recognize where we are. It’s been years since I’ve been out here. “My grandmother’s house was just over that hill.” I point out my window.
“Really? That’s quite the coincidence.”
“Grayson lives out here?”
“Uh, no, not exactly.”
“What does that mean?” My stomach starts to knot as the silence stretches after my unanswered question.
A few minutes later, Gwen pulls into a long, oddly familiar driveway. The tree-lined gravel road opens up to a gorgeous log cabin that tugs at an old, hazy memory. I’m pretty sure my dad used to work at this farm, but I don’t remember it looking this nice.
Several trucks are parked a little way from the house, and Gwen finds a spot off to the side of them. “Okay, don’t be mad, but I knew you wouldn’t come if you knew where we were going.”
“Gwen…” I have a sinking suspicion I know whose house we’re at.
“Look, I know he hasn’t been the nicest guy, but I figured I could run interference all night, and Holt’s brothers are here too, along with Gia and all the kids. You won’t have to interact with him at all, I swear.”
I sigh. “You owe me for this. I should’ve been told where we were going.”
“I’ll make it up to you. Promise. And we’ll leave the second Knox is an asshole to you.”
I get out before I can change my mind. It’s too tempting to stay in the safety of Gwen’s car. Maybe there are enough people here that her promise might be kept.
I’m not going to hold my breath.
* * *
“You have my mad respect.” Nix presses his palms together and bows.
I roll my eyes at his theatrics. Holt’s brother is the epitome of the broody, cool high school art teacher that all the girls have crushes on—students and teachers alike.
Tonight, he’s wearing paint-splattered jeans and an old T-shirt that looks like it’s from when he was in high school.
With his wavy blonde hair stylishly pushed back off his face and charming smile, he could fit in just about anywhere.
I’m a little jealous of how easily social he is in any setting.
We’ve interacted a bit at school functions, but I don’t know him all that well.
“If I had to deal with the attitudes of teenagers, I think I’d go crazy,” I respond.
“I don’t know. Kids’ tantrums can be rough.”
He’s got me there. It’s not an everyday occurrence, but there are times when all the kids struggle to listen. It can be exhausting.
“Daddy!” Finn calls out. “My marshmallow’s on fire.”
Knox darts toward his son, calmly blowing out the flaming ball of sugar. Finn looks like he’s a second away from crying. Knox squats down and speaks quietly to Finn, rubbing his back in soothing strokes.
“It still amazes me how well-suited Knox is to fatherhood,” Nix murmurs to me. “He loves that boy more than he’s ever loved anything.”
“I think the feeling is mutual,” I respond as Finn drops his head back in laughter.
Knox is grinning at his son, the firelight sparkling in his deep brown eyes.
Without his cowboy hat on, he looks like a totally different person.
He’s a little less rugged tonight, with a flannel over his grey T-shirt and his jeans clean instead of dusty from a long day on the farm.
Even his beard looks a little less unkempt.
I startle when Knox’s gaze crashes into mine. It’s the first time he’s ever looked at me without a sneer curling his upper lip.
When he finally looks away, I exhale as if I’d been holding my breath the whole time.
“Well, that was intense,” Nix says with a hint of humor.
I shake my head, refusing to acknowledge whatever that was. “I’m going to grab a drink.”
“I’d need one too, if Knox Waters looked at me like that,” he teases.
I roll my eyes but can’t hide my smirk. Instead of responding, I head over to the coolers to grab a soda.
Gia is digging through one, mumbling under her breath about how her heart is going to stop from how cold the ice is.
She rights herself with two beer bottles in her hands.
“Hi, friend,” she greets me. “I’m glad you came. ”
“Me too, oddly enough. I was a little iffy on it when we first pulled up.”
Gia scrunches her nose. “Yeah, that was sort of my idea. Sorry for tricking you.”
I chuckle. “It’s okay. I’m glad you did. I’m having more fun than I expected. Holt’s brothers are hilarious.”
“Can you imagine having five brothers around you all the time?” Her wide eyes mirror my own horrified thoughts on the subject.
“Not even for a minute. My solo childhood was probably for the best.”
Holt’s the oldest of six, and all of them were adopted out of the foster care system when they were little. Every single one of them acts like they’re blood-related, which I find wonderfully refreshing.
“I’d better get these over to my brooding man.” Gia tilts her head toward where Holt is sitting on the back of his tailgate. He’s very obviously lost in thought, and I wish I could do more to help him.
“Go, I’ll see if I can find a way to distract him.”
Gia grins in thanks before heading off toward Holt.
I glance around at the mostly familiar faces surrounding the bonfire.
A lot of the people here either grew up with me or I’ve interacted with them since I moved back.
I spot Holt’s youngest brother scrolling on his phone that’s connected to a speaker.
“Hey, Gage.”
He glances up, a wide smile forming the second he sees me. “Farrah! How are you, babe?”
“I’m fine. Look, I was wondering if you could play something we could dance to. I want to help Gia get Holt out of his funk.”
Gage’s crystal-blue eyes flick over to where Holt and Gia are cuddling. “You’re brilliant, fairy friend. Give me a sec. I’ll find the perfect song.”
I have no idea where Gage comes up with his nicknames, but he says that kind of stuff to everyone. Sometimes I wonder if he can’t remember our names fast enough, so he says something else instead.
He scrolls for a few seconds before turning on an upbeat song we’ve all danced to at the Howling Wolf bar. Grayson grabs his best friend, Kylie, to dance, Gage reaches out for Gwen, and Gia encourages Holt to dance with her. It’s exactly what I’d hoped for.
Off to the side, Leah’s sister Lauren is watching her dad twirl Gia around with a soft smile on her face. I quickly grab Lauren’s arms and pull her out to the makeshift dancefloor with everyone else. It makes her laugh, and she drops her head back as her giggles ring out.
My gaze strays over to Knox, surprised to find him looking at me. I’m taken aback by his expression, but it’s gone within a second.
Was that affection in his eyes just now? No. There’s no way. He hates my guts. It doesn’t matter what I say to him—it pisses him off.
He must have been looking at Lauren. Or maybe Finn. He just pulled Leah into his arms to dance, which is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.
I spend the rest of the night studiously avoiding looking at Knox. Whatever he was thinking earlier has no bearing on how he actually feels about me. It would be stupid to think that maybe he’s ready to bury the hatchet.
I would need to hear those words straight from the horse’s mouth before I’d believe it.