Chapter 4
Waking up in Pax’s arms hasn’t lost its luster one bit.
If anything, it’s even better the second time around.
Seven-thirty, says the clock. Blake stretches and yawns, arching back against Pax’s chest as he stirs, humming with happiness before closing his eyes again and drifting.
So sue him for stealing a few more minutes of peace with Pax — Blake is sure the producers will have something up their sleeves for today, and at best, the two of them are going to have to answer for their crimes.
When they arrived back at the room last night, there was some kind of drama going down with the girls.
Despite the loud crying and shoe-throwing, they’d managed to avoid being pulled in, and Blake still isn’t entirely sure what the whole thing was about.
He would have asked Ariana, but she was buried under several layers of bed covers by the time he sought her out.
Brushing teeth side-by-side and exchanging shy smiles with Pax while their cast-mates screamed at each other in the adjacent room was a kind of weird Blake hopes to never experience again, but on the other hand, he’s nothing except grateful it wasn’t Pax yelling at him.
No, the two of them are good, and seemingly on the same page about only having eyes for each other. Now, anyway.
The day passes fairly quickly. Smoothly, in fact, and with no surprises save for the big reveal of the damage that’s been done to the prize pot.
As expected, Blake and Pax suffer the wrath of their cast-mates — Vincent even throws a drink on them and says some choice words that Blake’s pretty sure even Streamflix can’t air.
To his shock, though, he and Pax weren’t the only ones breaking the rules the night before, and that drama pulls the spotlight away from them in a big way. Apparently, Leah and Dani had a little makeout session of their own, which led to the knock-down, drag-out screaming fight they walked in on.
Fortunately for Ariana and unfortunately for the production team, Dani had come crawling back on her hands and knees early this morning (guess “on your knees” was the theme of last night’s party, Blake thinks).
They’d worked things out in a very emotional moment on the beach at sunrise that everyone else was blessedly unconscious for, and are already back to cuddling on a loveseat together.
Although, from the way Ariana is glaring, she’s still very prepared to hate Leah for the rest of their lives.
Regardless of the fact that his and Pax’s blowjob-plus-pucker-up cost the group nine thousand dollars and Leah and Dani’s little fling only lost them three, everyone seems to lump both indiscretions together.
Equally irresponsible, and all that. Once the cameras get whatever they need of people bitching about money, though, the fire seems to go out of the complainers’ sails.
Even Vincent seems to have resigned himself to the fact that the pot going down is more or less inevitable.
Blake side-eyes that, wonders if Vin has his eye on breaking some rules himself with Amber later. Good for him.
The producers end up giving them another entire day of hanging out and socializing.
Blake can hardly believe their luck, but he’s not about to question it, either.
He plays a few board games with Ariana and Pax, has a leisurely lunch with Pax and Leah down on the beach, and overall, keeps picking Pax’s brain about who he is, what he’s about.
That quest becomes easier when Rachel pulls Blake aside and offers him the use of some paddleboards, if he wants to take Pax out on the ocean, just the two of them.
Of course, there’s a catch — the boards come with a crew following behind in a beat little dingy rowed by a guy who looks so bored even he can’t believe he’s awake, but it’s still fun.
Blake even manages to open up to Pax some, talking about the loss of his mom and his dad’s subsequent struggle to cope.
How he basically raised Hayden and gave up everything in his own life to do it.
In return, Pax goes into more detail about his addiction — how he broke his foot and got hooked on the narcotics he was prescribed.
How he found it impossible to quit them and how it slowly took over his life until he found himself shooting heroin in an abandoned house downtown.
If he hadn’t had brothers that cared, people who went looking for him, Pax tells Blake, he would have died there.
He’s a triplet, Pax is — one brother named Spencer and one named Vaughn, both unbelievably straight-laced and responsible.
A fucking accountant and a pastor who’s known for prayerful healing, which makes Pax the unquestioned black sheep of the trio.
Still, he says, they love him like he isn’t, and that’s why he’s here today.
Everything he says makes Blake want to know more, to get closer, to peel back Paxton’s layers and find out what’s underneath.
Spending an entire afternoon watching Pax’s back muscles flex as he balances on the board and propels himself forward with the paddle has that thought translating pretty fucking literally, too — but that’s neither here nor there.
Doesn’t matter, they make it through the day and another night of cuddling without breaking any rules, where the fuck is Blake’s cookie?
As time goes on, Blake is (shockingly) finding it easier and easier to ignore the cameras.
After all, he’s already done the worst stuff possible in front of them, what’s a little emotional vulnerability?
Hayden is gonna lose his hair when he sees this, Blake can feel it already.
There’s no way in hell he’s going to be able to convince his little brother that the show isn’t scripted.
Well, not unless he has someone by his side to back him up…
But that’s not something Blake can even begin to think about. Not yet.
Sometime during day four, the producers announce that the group is going to participate in a workshop.
They’re hustled down to the grassy courtyard where they hung out on that first day, waiting to film their entrances.
Upon stepping in, Blake takes note of four portable platforms — maybe three feet by three feet — spread out several yards apart on the grass.
Right away, Rachel divvies them all into twosomes: Blake and Pax (fucking yes), Ariana and Dani, Vincent and Amber, Doctor Matt and Leah. They’re each assigned a platform and they take their places.
Added to the faux-wooden spaces they’re standing on are several long lengths of soft, pliable rope and oh, more hell yes. Blake’s pretty sure he knows where this workshop is headed, and he’s way in. From the sparkle in Pax’s eye, he is too.
“Shibari,” their instructor declares, as she walks leisurely through the grass in between the various pairings of people.
“That’s what we’re dipping our toes into today.
It’s sexy, it’s fun, and it’s an amazing tool to help you develop communication strategies with your partner that you can then apply to other aspects of your relationship.
It takes trust to allow someone to tie you up, takes focus and discipline to ensure you’re caring for the person you’re binding.
You have to talk to your partner to ensure you’re meeting each other’s needs, that everyone is having fun.
Be vocal about what you like, what you don’t like.
Lean into the power play aspects, take turns giving up and taking control.
And then take what you’ve learned with you when you go. ”
The hardest thing about the Shibari workshop for Blake is pretending he hasn’t done this before.
Pax catches on quickly though, as he’s twining the rope around Blake’s wrists and up his arms and Blake naturally relaxes into it.
“Hmm,” Pax hums thoughtfully, a knowing smile gracing his face and that twinkle from earlier returning to his eyes. “Isn’t that interesting?”
“Is it?” Blake replies softly, stepping closer as Paxton winds the rope around both of their torsos, binding them together.
“Oh, yes,” Pax says, holding the ends of the rope up with one hand and lifting his eyes to meet Blake’s.
Gulp, is the only word that comes to Blake’s mind.
The patch of grass their platform is on sits directly under a large palm frond waving overhead.
There’s a soft breeze, the day is warm but not excruciatingly hot, and the ocean can be heard crashing in the background.
And yet, all of that pales in comparison, loses its luster and shine, fades easily into the background when competing for attention with the man that’s standing in front of Blake.
If his hands weren’t tied and bound to his chest, Blake would reach out and cup Paxton’s cheek.
If his physical wants and needs weren’t equally tied without any rope at all, he’d lean forward and kiss him.
As it is, all he can do is stare into Pax’s eyes and let him stare back.
It trips Blake up, this kind of intimacy with no expectation, but at the same time, he’s started to get used to it — maybe even crave it.
It’s easily as powerful as any off-limits moment they’ve shared, and secretly, Blake is so glad that he stayed.
Maybe not so secretly. Pax seems to get it, anyway.
Right now, he leans forward so that their foreheads touch, closing his eyes and leading Blake to follow suit.
Blake can’t decide whether to shove down or lean into how safe and secure being wrapped up like this (and with Pax) makes him feel, so he just goes with it.
Their moment is interrupted all too soon by the sound of giggling girls — or more specifically, a cackling redhead.
Blake cracks one eye open to find Ariana and Dani working off to their right, Ariana gleefully winding rope around Dani in a way that looks the exact opposite of what he and Pax have been doing.
“How is this fun?!” Dani squeals from her seat on the platform, delicate wrists bound tight to her ankles.