Chapter 16 Jahmir
SIXTEEN
JAHMIR
Song: Methrone- Last Time
Tatiyonna was being funny by making me wait.
I had all fucking night to wait. My soul without her was lost and hearing her verbally tell me that she was going back to her husband tore my heart out of my chest. Still to this day, I hated how I handled the abortion situation.
I felt like that was our chance. That was our blessing, and we were going to spend the rest of our lives together.
I still imagined myself spoiling her and our baby.
She would’ve never had to lift a damn finger.
Tatiyonna pulled up next to me, twenty minutes later than I asked.
I don’t know what she had did to her hair, but it was no longer short.
I’m assuming she went and got a wig put on.
She wore a long black trench coat with a pair of red heels.
That shit made me sit up in my seat. She looked at me and walked by, making sure to flip her hair.
I didn’t get out immediately. I wanted to give her time to get her music and shit set up.
One last dance from her was all I needed.
When I got out of my car, I could smell her perfume.
I pulled the door open and locked it behind me.
She had already turned the light down and the music was playing.
Unlike our first encounter, she wasn’t in the bathroom getting undressed.
She had a chair in the middle of the floor waiting for me.
I took a seat in the chair, and she wasted no time sitting her ass on my lap and grinding to music.
Every time I tried to touch her, she slapped my hands away.
For two songs, I let her seduce the hell out of me without touching her.
I took that thin ass red outfit she had on and ripped it off.
Giving her neck a light squeeze, I brought her in for a kiss.
I hadn't been with this woman in almost two months and she was still able to get my dick growing. My secretary didn’t even have it like that anymore.
And trust, I tried. The way Tatiyonna made me feel was dangerous.
I was willing to kill anyone and bury their ass under concrete.
“Sit up,” I told her, between us kissing.
She lifted up so I could get my pants down, and as soon as she felt me at her opening, she stopped me.
“Jah, we can’t do this shit again.”
“Look, sit your ass down, please. I’m not about to go there with you. I want you to sit down and talk to me with my dick in you. I know I would have your full attention like this. I’ll make love to you at my place.”
“Jah,” she whimpered as I eased her down.
“Nah, open your eyes so we can talk.”
“What?” I caught her off guard.
“I want to apologize for how I acted about the abortion. I’m man enough to say that I should’ve considered what you were going through.
You know how I feel about family and the shit hurt.
I’m not going to sit here and lie to you.
You took a piece of me away from you without considering me.
Granted, I was avoiding you, but my house is always open to you.
I’m learning this whole love thing and sometimes I hate it had to be you.
You’ve belonged to someone else since I met you.
I meant every word I said earlier, though, Tatiyonna. I’ll always be here for you.”
“I’m sorry too. I’ve been trying to get pregnant for so long, and then when it happened, I was shocked. So much was going through my head. What was I going to tell him…”
“Don’t mention him when you’re with me. I don’t really care how he would’ve felt. Did he give a damn how you felt when he was on the other side of town nutting in another woman?”
“Well, no.”
“Aight then. You made your decision based off him and not me.”
“Now that you put it that way. I was wrong too and I’m sorry. I don’t want you to think that I don’t love you, because I do. I just need security and stability. I’m not sure if I can get that from you being we’ve only known each other for such a short amount of time.”
“And you can get that from him, I’m assuming?
The same one that left depleted. When I met you, you were stressed out and doubting yourself.
Look at you now. And let’s talk about this stability and security shit because I’ve never made you feel unsafe.
You know what you’re telling me right now is bullshit and excuses. Don’t forget that I see you.”
“I’m scared, Jah. I know what to expect from him.”
“I love you, Tatiyonna, and I get it. I just want you to know that you’re worth it. I’ll hold my love for you because I know he’s going to fuck up again, and I’ll be right here waiting on you. You hear me?”
“Yes.”
“Now get off my dick, you’re staying with me tonight.”
“I can’t, Jah.”
I pulled my pants up and stared at her. “What did I just say? You owe me this last time, Tatiyonna. Matter fact, just so you know, I’m not playing, leave your car and come on.”
I ran us a bath when I got to the house. She knew her way around my house, but she was acting like a stranger, and that made me feel like shit. Was this what she meant by security? I walked up to her and pulled her to me.
“Can you please not act like you haven’t been over here before? What do I need to do to make you comfortable? I understand this is it for us, but I want to make love to you and just hold you one last time. What do you need from me?” I lifted her chin so she could look at me.
“I’m fine, Jah.”
“You sure? If you want me to take you back, I will. I don’t want you acting like we’re strangers.”
“I want to be here.”
I kissed her and let her go.
“The bath is ready. I’ll join you shortly.”
As she went to my room, I had to take a shot.
My heart was aching, but I couldn’t show it.
I didn’t want her to feel guilty about the decision she made.
I wanted her to pick me because she wanted to, not because of guilt.
A few deep breaths, I walked upstairs and joined her in the tub.
I wasn’t in a rush to have sex with her.
I just wanted her in my presence. We stared at each other for a minute before she turned around and leaned against me.
I closed my eyes and leaned my head back.
My heart was telling me everything was going to be alright after tonight, but I knew deep down, I would probably never see her again on this level.
She wasn’t the type to cheat and I wouldn’t want her to.
We see where this shit got us. Falling in love and can’t be together in the end.
I guess she could feel my stress. She grabbed my soap and lathered it up so she could bathe me.
In return, I did the same thing. Once we dried off, we were in bed, just quiet.
I was holding her and she was holding on to my arms. If this was what it felt like to get your heart broken, I didn’t want to feel this shit ever again.
Tatiyonna rolled over so we were face to face and placed a sensual kiss on my lips.
“I love you,” she whispered.
“I love you too, baby.”
“I know.” She let the tear roll from her eyes.
I let her go and wiped her tears before I went down to my favorite place. Placing her legs on my shoulders, I eat her pussy until she was crying from pleasure. Once she was satisfied and drained, I reached over to my nightstand to grab a condom, but she stopped me.
“Just one last time, Jah. Whatever happens, happens.”
I slid in slowly, and we both released a moan that echoed off the walls. The way our bodies connected, we were meant to be. As she whispered my name in my ear, I tried to block it out and focus.
“I love you, Tatiyonna. You are my everything, baby,” I told her. “This will forever be my pussy.”
“Yes, baby.”
Hearing her lie in my ear infuriated me.
She was leaving here today to go and be with a man who would never love her on the level that I would.
As I felt my nut build, I tried to pull out, but she grabbed me around my neck and wrapped her legs tightly around me.
I was able to release, but I was sure some still got inside of her.
“Tatiyonna, that shit wasn’t cool. Make sure to take a Plan B. I don’t want to deal with the heartbreak of killing another one of my kids. Get dressed,” I told her as I went to the bathroom and closed the door.
I stared at myself in the mirror and squeezed the counter to stay calm. My first mind told me to strap up. Hopefully, there wasn’t enough sperm in her to get her ass pregnant. After I cleaned myself up, I walked out the bedroom to see her dressed in a pair of my jogging pants and a shirt.
“I’m ready,” she said, looking down at the floor.
The drive back to her studio was hard. She sat in the passenger seat, silently crying like I was making the decision for her.
She didn’t have to leave. I would’ve stood right by her side as she got her divorce.
What I wasn’t about to do was stand in between what she wanted to do. I loved her too much.
“Jah—.”
“It’s cool,” I cut her off. “I love you enough to let your ass go, baby. You don’t have to keep explaining to me. Your mind is made up.”
With that, she got out of the car and got in her car. She sat there for a minute. I didn’t want to pull off without knowing she was safe. Seeing her sitting in her car crying was only making things worse for me. I started my car and left her at her studio.
“You sure you’re okay?” Lonni asked as she helped put my shirt on.
I had an emergency scare, and she had me rushed to the hospital. What I thought were minor heart palpitations was a small heart attack. Now I had to walk around for two weeks with a heart monitor on.
“I’m good, Lonni. You don’t have to treat me like a baby. It was a minor heart attack. I’m good.”
“Bring the attitude down. Don’t take your frustrations out on me. You haven’t talked to that girl in three months. Let the shit go already. It’s making you sick,” she fussed.