Chapter 17 The Engagement
After leaving Vee’s bright sunny room, I approach Jake in the waiting area, unable to meet his gaze. My cheeks are burning.
“I’m going to visit my parents,” I mumble. “Vee wants to see you again if you have a minute.”
Without waiting for a response, I dart into the elevator bank, eager to escape.
Stumbling out into the fall sunshine, I head toward Central Park.
Gulping in the crisp air, trying to breathe.
I watch a leaf seesawing gently down to the ground, and my shoulders soften and my mind quiets.
Suddenly, I’m certain I’ll join Jake in this crazy plan if he agrees.
I questioned the existence of my guardian angel just this morning, but I realize they must still be watching over me as they handed me my next four months on a silver platter.
This is not the time to shrink back into my shell. At least not yet. Excitement races down my spine, I feel taller than my five foot two.
After a friendly visit with my mom and babcia, I make one stop on the way back to Vee’s: purchasing a cell phone.
Vee may not blame me, but it’s certainly my fault we couldn’t find each other at the party.
If I had a phone, Vee could have reached me last night when she needed me the most. That will never happen again.
The next morning, I unplug my new shiny phone from the charger and turn it on. I feel invincible when I figure out how to google the hospital to get their phone number.
“Hello, room 525 please.” I say.
“Hello.”
“Hi Vee. It’s me . . . Em. Guess what?”
“Uh-huh, let’s see. Did you have sex again?”
“Oh, my god. No! Now you’ve ruined my surprise!” I harrumph. “I’m calling on my new cell phone. Let me give you the number so you can call me anytime.”
“Oh, that is cool. Very nice Em. I just was thinking about how I’ll miss our late-night conversations when I head to Jackson. But now I can call you whenever I want to hear your sweet voice.” Vee lowers her voice to a whisper. “Just to let you know, Jake is totally still into the plan.”
“The plan?” I ask hesitantly.
“Yes, the plan, silly goose. The engagement and moving in and stuff.”
Staring at the phone, I struggle to register what Vee just said, but my mind has completely seized up.
My calm and rational decision to agree to the plan yesterday has completely vanished, replaced by a tangled mess of nerves that’s on the verge of unleashing tears at the mere thought of Vee’s ridiculous plan.
“Are you still there? Did you hear me?”
“Yes. I’m here.” My voice catches. “I’m not sure what to say or do. Why would he want to do a fake engagement? It all seems crazy, doesn’t it?”
“It isn’t crazy at all. It’s brilliant. You know kill two birds with one stone and all—”
I cut her off, “You know I can’t stand that expression.”
“Oh right, I forgot.” I hear a smile through the phone. “You and Jake are perfect for each other.”
Perfect for each other echoes in my ears.
Vee remains in the hospital for one more day. Jake picks her up and brings her to the apartment.
The second she walks through the door, I hug and hold her tight, whispering, “I’m so, so sorry.”
She grips me back and whispers fiercely, “Emma, listen to me. You actually may have saved me. This experience made me realize I needed to get clean for good. Stop being a goose and help me figure out what one packs for a stint in rehab.”
We all laugh, and the somber mood in the room lightens.
“Come along,” she says lightly and leads us to her room.
I watch her as she slowly packs; she looks tired and scared, but the hollowness behind her eyes is gone and in its place is a hint of a spark of determination. She almost seems relaxed.
When her single large bag is full to the brim, Jake carries it downstairs for her and we hail a cab for the airport. She’ll fly straight to Jackson, Mississippi, and her parents will meet her there to drive her to the Jackson Rehabilitation Center.
The three of us squeeze into the back of the cab with Vee in the middle. She smiles at each of us. She has brokered our deal, and we will be starting the plan once she leaves.
Glancing at Jake and with a whine in her voice, Vee begs, “You need to promise to call me with details when you drop the bomb on Carol and Oliver.”
Jake coughs uncomfortably.
“Come on. Do it just like I laid out. At dinner at your parents’, get down on one knee and pop the question. Oh, I just wish I could be there.”
Shaking his head, Jake fires back, “Absolutely not. We will go over there with the story already concocted and Emma will have the ring on her finger. God, in front of my parents? You are truly nuts.”
Watching Vee and Jake argue back and forth, I can’t remember what made me agree to this insanity. Perspiration drips down my side, and I cross my arms, wedging my hands under each armpit.
Vee turns to me and notes my posture, as I’m trying to disappear into the seat. She tugs at one of my arms, looking way too happy for someone heading to rehab. “I have a gift for you that you must promise you will use,” she says.
I reply, mystified, “I’m sure I will use it; I never waste a thing. What is it?”
“I got you a four-month pass to Asana. Promise me you’ll go.”
I clap my hand over my mouth. “You didn’t.”
“I did.”
“Oh, that’s so nice . . . but I can’t go without you.”
Vee tuts, “You are getting pretty good, and you know you really love it.”
I incline my head sheepishly, “I do think I kinda like it sometimes.”
Vee smirks. “I knew all your complaining was just a big show. Now try to go at least three times a week, and you’ll be a pro in no time.”
Jake snorts and we both turn to him. He mutters something about yoga instructors and then he shifts in his seat, looking chagrined, and stares out the window.
The taxi pulls up to JFK, and we hustle out, taking turns giving Vee hugs. She tears up as we say our goodbyes. As soon as I see her tears, the waterworks start flowing from me, and soon I’m a mess, blowing my nose and wiping my eyes.
Jake and I jump back into the taxi, and we watch Vee strut into the airport. She looks tall and strong. She turns at the automatic doors and gives us a jaunty wave.
On the drive back, I silently chew my lip, making sure our shoulders don’t touch when we take a turn.
We haven’t been alone or talked since that morning and the tension between us makes my stomach cramp.
A picture flashes before my eyes of me in the stiff dining room with a fake ring on my finger, and Jake’s parents’ cold eyes staring at the ring in horror. I shudder.
Jake takes my hand and gives it a squeeze. It’s the first time we have touched each other since . . .
A shiver shoots right through me, and I pull my hand away.
Jake asks quietly, “How do you want to be proposed to?”
I shake my head, “I have no idea. I’ve never thought about it.”
“Aww come on, all girls dream of this and have their perfect proposal all planned out in their head.”
“Nope, not me,” I say firmly. “Maybe if it was remotely possible, I may have started spinning scenarios—but with no prospects, I never saw the point.”
Jake nudges me. “No prospects, that can’t be true. There must have been some boys at the bakery that wanted to butter that roll . . .”
My cheeks heat up as I picture the red smear on the sheet.
“Sorry, that was kind of crass. I don’t know why I even said that. Dammit, I’m a little nervous.”
I look up sharply to see if he is making fun of my bundle of nerves. His cheeks are a little flushed. I manage to reply evenly, “No problem.”
He regains his composure. “Leave it to me. I will plan the perfect surprise, fake proposal.”
I try to smile. “It just can’t be Vee’s idea. Please make it just the two of us. I’m an awful actress, so no audience, please.”
Jake’s lips twitch, and he leans back appearing to be pondering possible proposals.
Two days later, my new cell phone rings and breathless I pick it up.
“Hello.”
“Hi, guess what?” Without waiting for an answer, Jake continues, “I heard there’s a Cooper’s hawk in the Ramble. I thought we could go and see if we can spot it. It’s a recent arrival that will likely spend the winter.”
I clap my free hand to my mouth. “Oh, how exciting, I’ve never seen one before.” I pause and continue. “I can meet you there in fifteen minutes. I was going to visit my mother and my babcia this afternoon, so this will be on the way.”
Grabbing my coat, I fly out the door, only to come to a screeching halt and rush back into the apartment. I sit at Vee’s little vanity with a mirror and cute mini-chair, trying to apply a little makeup artfully and quickly without Vee’s supervision.
When I finish, I inspect myself in the mirror; I think I’ve done a pretty good job, although my cheeks barely need any added blush as they already are pink with excitement.
Time to go! I remind myself, and I fly out the door.
Spotting Jake with binoculars in hand, I think, I’m such an idiot. I forgot to bring along my binoculars.
I get closer and stamp my foot in exasperation. “I forgot your special gift. I just flew out the door.” I turn bright red, recalling how I had enough time to put on makeup but didn’t have enough wherewithal to bring the one thing I needed.
Jake smiles pleasantly and takes the strap from over his head and places his binoculars in my hands, putting the strap securely over my head. “Well then it’s a good thing I brought these, isn’t it?”
I quickly recover my excitement and put the bins to my eyes and breathe, “Okay, have you spotted it?”
There is silence. I take the binoculars down and look to my left—Jake is gone.
I hear a sound and look down; he’s on one knee and holding something in his hand up towards me. I tilt my head and peer down at him. Then I pull back in confusion and shock. It’s a delicate ring that looks like a diamond.
“Emma,” he says, “will you get engaged to me for the next four months?”
I blush a red-hot crimson and tears threaten to spill down my cheeks. I can’t believe it; I can’t believe any of it. This is so special and awful all at the same time.
I choke out, “You idiot! What are you doing?”
Jake calmly gets up and replies, “We need to do this properly, and I thought what better place than your favorite spot in New York.”
I look around; we are right near my favorite bench in the middle of the Ramble. I ask with a pout, “So, no Cooper’s hawk? No lifer?”
Jake explodes with a laugh, “Sorry. No Cooper’s hawk. I tried, but he wouldn’t cooperate.”
I look around again and remember watching couples holding hands and cuddling and being so envious. It’s right here that I used to watch the world go by. I admit to myself that this is exactly how I would have wanted my real proposal to be.
Sighing, I ask, “How did you know this is my favorite spot?”
Jake suddenly looks a little sheepish. “I’ve seen you here over the years, so I figured you liked it.”
“You have? I’ve never seen you.”
Jake shrugs. “Try it on. It’s the ring my dad gave my mom when they were still pretty poor, so it isn’t much, but I always liked it. It’s certainly better than the huge bauble my mom has now from Oliver. We can get it adjusted.”
I slide it on my finger; it fits perfectly. I flash it at Jake, and he smiles.
“Does your mom know what you are doing with it?”
Jake kicks the ground with his foot and admits, “Not really. She gave me the ring years ago—I think in case I might need to sell it someday, if she and Oliver fell apart or he kicked me out.”
Holding my hand out, I stare at the delicate band with the perfect, oval-shaped, sparkling diamond. It is perfect. I clutch my hand to my chest and ask hesitantly, “Do we have to tell your parents now?”
Jake shakes his head. “We don’t have to yet. We just needed a story of where and when I popped the question. So, we can tell them it when we are ready.”
I nod relieved.
Jake responds lightly, “But pretty soon, I’ve got to get out of the pressure cooker, or I may explode all over their lovely rug and walls.”
I’m still reeling from what’s just transpired, but I can’t shake my anxiety over the next step in our ruse. Why did I ever agree to this?
I clench my fists and swallow the lump in my throat.
“I’m going to visit my mom and grandmother right now, like I said.
Do you want to practice on them—tell them and see how it goes?
I feel bad about the—the whole thing, but I’ve got to tell them something about losing my personal assistant job and see if they need me back at the bakery.
We could tell them everything all at once. ”
This way, we will be able to tell my mother without my father there. This will give my father some time to adjust to the idea of a pending marriage—especially to the dreaded Jake. My stomach clenches. I’m not sure if I’m more jittery about my dad’s reaction or about being engaged to Jake.
Jake frowns. “You aren’t going back to the bakery, are you? They don’t pay you, remember? Maybe you could get a different job. You know, one that pays.”
I shrug. I have almost $5,000 saved from my month of working for Vee so I’m rich beyond belief.
Jake tugs at my arm and leads me over to my bench. I go willingly, as I’ve always wanted to sit there with someone. We’re both silent for a few minutes—a nice, comfortable silence. I lean back and relax. Then I hear the familiar song of a robin, and I relax even more.
Finally, Jake turns to me. “Maybe you could apply for a job at Columbia. They always have openings for some low-paid assistant to a professor or something like that.”
I straighten up, frowning. “No, I’m not qualified for any-thing like that.”
“You are much more qualified than some student who’s doing it for the money or for the resume-building,” Jake says.
“You’re a hard worker, and I may know a professor who is looking for an assistant.
Not a teaching assistant, but for a study that needs someone to help with the organizing and tracking.
I’ll ask him about it and see if it’s still open.
If it is, I’ll recommend you. Honestly, you would be perfect. ”
“Jake, I couldn’t,” I protest. “You couldn’t. I won’t know what to do.”
Jake leans back with a satisfied smile on his face. “You will be perfect. More than perfect. Remember how worried you were about figuring out how to be a personal assistant? And you were fantastic.”
Until I wasn’t and then look what happened.
Jake jumps up. “Let’s do it!” he exclaims. “Let’s tell your parents.”
He puts out his hand and pulls me to stand. “Come on, this will be the easy one.”
His enthusiasm is infectious. As we walk to 933 Fifth Avenue, I practically bounce down the street. My earlier nerves are almost completely gone.