Chapter 30
CHAPTER THIRTY
I’m so fucking mad at Luciano, I can hardly breathe.
I miss him, but I absolutely fucking hate him right now, too.
It’s been five days since Javier showed up on my roof, crashing the date Luciano had planned for us, and I still haven’t heard from him.
Him being Luciano, not Javier. I hope to never hear from that man again.
If I thought my heart hurt the moment Luciano walked away, I had no idea what I was in for over the next few days.
The only reason I know he’s still breathing is because I’ve been asking Vinnie for updates, even though I’m trying my best to not drive her crazy, or worse—put her in the middle of this like she feared she’d be if something happened between us.
It’s really quite frustrating that, even as my lawyer, Luciano won’t return my calls. I haven’t bothered reaching out to his office directly, though, despite having no idea what my status is with the court system now, knowing the legality of this marriage is a complete sham.
But as heartbroken as I feel, I haven’t spent this time crying. No one has time for tears, not when the best revenge in life is bettering yourself. Not that I’m actively seeking revenge on anyone, so long as I never see Javier’s face again.
He may have temporarily ruined what Luce and I have going, but I’m choosing to believe it is temporary. It doesn’t feel like our story is over. It feels like it’s just beginning, and this is one of those roadblocks some couples are unlucky enough to deal with.
But Luciano is a stubborn man, and him saying he needs time makes me nervous he’ll never hear me out.
I’m scared he’ll draw his own conclusions about whether I knew or not.
The only thing I’m holding onto is hope.
I know how strongly Luciano loves when he gives it.
I’ve seen it in the way he loves his family.
And I know he loves me. You can’t fall out of love in one second flat, and as angry as he is, I don’t doubt that his feelings are still there. It’s just a matter of when he’s willing to speak to me again.
But here’s the thing. A relationship is a two-way street.
I love him. I’ve always loved him. But no man is worth losing yourself over, and I’m not a woman who will sit here and beg for him to love me. On the contrary, as each day passes without him returning my calls or texts, the angrier I become.
He’s sent me one message.
One.
And all it did was make my blood boil.
Asshat Lawyer
I still need more time.
I did nothing wrong.
If Luce doesn’t want to hear me out, and if he doesn’t believe me, then those are his decisions, but there’s only a short window of time before I close myself off to him, because how is that fair?
As a lawyer, he should know someone is innocent until proven guilty.
Yes, that might be a complete cliché. But it’s a factual cliché nonetheless, and I deserve the respect to be heard.
Javier blindsided us both. Everything he told me I believed sincerely. I always seek the best in people and am willing to give the benefit of the doubt.
Or at least I have been. I’m not sure if I’ll continue to have that same sentiment after how broken this entire situation has left me.
Needing to get out of the house, I call my driver and ask him to meet me out front, then I send a text to Vinnie and Cecilia.
I’m headed to fifth. Anyone feel like shopping?
I set my phone down and pull my favorite lipstick out of my clutch, applying it in front of the entryway mirror.
Weaving my fingers through my hair at my scalp, I fluff it to give myself a little more volume, then pinch my cheeks to reapply some color to them.
While I’m doing this, a few text messages come through, so I swipe my phone from where I placed it and read through them.
Vinnie
Sure, dinner after?
Vinnie
I’m starving.
Cecilia
Let me grab a cab. Be there shortly.
Of course to dinner, duh. Text me when you guys get there and I’ll let you know where I’m at. I’m starting at Cartier.
Cecilia
Shopping for anything special?
Myself.
Fifteen minutes later, my driver is smiling at me through the rearview mirror as he guides us through New York traffic to get me to Fifth Avenue.
“Miss Lancaster, how have you been? It feels like you haven’t needed my services lately. I’m always here when you need me,” my driver, Darrin, engages me in conversation over the soft music from the radio.
“I’ve been okay. I appreciate your willingness to always be there. Things have been busy, and frankly, I’ve been finding myself grabbing a quick cab instead of bothering you. You know me, never quite certain where the wind will blow me, and when.”
He chuckles and clicks his turn signal on as he pulls alongside the curb, just shy of Cartier. “Never a bother. Would you like me to pick you up at a certain time?”
“No, but if you’ll remain on standby, the girls and I will grab dinner in a couple of hours, and depending on where we go, we might need a ride.”
“It would be my pleasure. Enjoy shopping, Miss Lancaster.”
“Thank you, Darrin.” I wave to him as I get out from the back seat.
The doorman at Cartier opens the thick glass door when he sees me coming, giving me a curt nod as a greeting while I offer a warm smile. Breezing past him, I enter one of the most beautiful stores.
It’s busy for a Thursday afternoon, mostly men looking at engagement rings, and my heart aches as I think about the ring I’m still wearing on a chain. It sits between my breasts, close to my heart, and I can’t bring myself to take it off.
The salespeople leave me be as I stroll around the store, my fingers lightly brushing against the pristine glass countertops showcasing the gorgeous jewelry displayed safely within its confines.
When I make it to the section where I know they put the new arrivals, a diamond choker catches my eye, and I stop to look at it.
“We just got this in,” a sales attendant steps closer to the counter, addressing me in a sugary, sweet voice. She’s younger than I am and has a vibrant smile. “I was eyeing it myself earlier, too.”
“It’s beautiful. I have a thing for chokers.”
“So vintage, right? I love old things from the 90s.”
“Hey now, the 90s are hardly vintage!” I laugh, playfully scrunching my nose. “I remember wearing chokers when they were popular and I’m not that old. Plus, chokers are a timeless trend. They were popular in the 20s and in the 40s, not just the 90s.” I grin at her. “May I try it on?”
“Please! You’ll be the first.”
With great care, she picks up the necklace and holds it above a satin pillow she placed on the countertop. Three rows of diamonds make up this necklace with a single thin clasp in the back.
“This particular necklace is called the Audrey. It’s made up of one hundred thirty-seven carats set in white gold.
The clasp in the back was designed to be invisible once the choker’s in place.
Although, it’s preferred that we refer to this necklace as the Audrey as l' écharpe, rather than a choker.” She lifts it. “May I?”
“Please.” Turning around, I pull my hair to the side, leaning back slightly to make it easier for her to reach me. Bringing the statement piece around my neck, she clasps it.
From my purse, I hear my phone vibrating, but I don’t bother reaching for it. Instead, I turn and face the small mirror on the counter, gently rubbing my fingers against the jewelry as I admire it.
“It’s absolutely stunning.” I make brief eye contact with the saleswoman. “I think I’m obsessed with it.”
“It looks gorgeous on you,” she confirms. Behind her, a man in a full suit approaches with his hands clasped behind his back.
“Ah, the Audrey.” He admires the piece of art around my neck. “This piece looks like it was made for you.”
“Maybe it was.” I smile, then look back down in the mirror. “And what is the price?”
“Six million, Miss.”
I purse my lips as I look at my reflection. The purchase would be indulgent, although the last time I spent millions on something was when I bought my apartment.
“I’ll take it,” I tell the saleswoman, and she beams at me.
“Special occasion?” the manager asks.
“Divorce.” It’s half true.
The manager’s face morphs from excitement to pity, then back to excitement all in the blink of an eye, and I do my best not to laugh at his expressions.
Returning my attention to the mirror to admire the necklace more, I hear the sound of heels against the hardwood flooring and the soft voices of my friends as they approach.
“There you are! What did you find?” Vinnie asks sweetly as she comes to stand by me, her hand rubbing against my back.
“Just a little number.” I wiggle my fingers toward the choker. “Isn’t it gorgeous?”
“That necklace looks like it was made for you!” Cecilia comes and stands on my other side. “Raina, it's absolutely stunning.”
“I think so, too. I’m buying it!”
“Let me help you remove it and I’ll get it packaged up for you,” the saleswoman interjects, and I turn and lean backward again so she can unclasp the necklace.
When she walks away, Vinnie laughs. “Starting off shopping strong, huh?”
“How can I resist when my week has been such a disaster?”
“How are you doing?” Cecilia gently asks with a tight smile.
“I’ve been better.” My gaze connects with Vinnie’s. “I still haven’t heard from him.”
“He’s okay,” she tells me simply. “Just insisting he needs time to think.”
I roll my eyes. “He doesn’t believe me. Well, he’s going to be really unhappy when he’s finally ready to talk and I got tired of waiting. This goes both ways. I get to choose to talk to him, too. He’s the one who walked away, not me.”
I’ve tried to not involve her, I really have, but I’m finding that the line between my best friend and Luciano’s sister is a thin one. I want to talk to her about these things, not because he’s her brother, but because she’s the person I talk to about everything.
“I understand, and I wouldn’t blame you if that day comes. You know just as well as I do how stubborn the Paladino men are.”