Chapter 7 #4
“Progressive?” Marty snickered and handed the joint to me.
“Let me tell you something about progression, my friend—it’s ruining America.
What’s wrong with a woman staying home and making babies?
If women go to work, who’s home to take care of your kids?
Do you really want someone you don’t know raising your kid so your woman can feel ‘progressive’?
” He made the air quotes with a look of disgust.
I frowned uncertainly. “And what if the man walks out and leaves his family behind? What then? Is he really being a man?”
“You ever think about why he would do that?” Marty asked aggressively.
“What it takes for him to give up his wife and kids and walk away from everything he worked hard for? Maybe it’s the woman’s fault he’s so unsatisfied at home.
We need to stop blamin’ the men and look at why they run.
These women have their men by the balls, and one day they snap and need to get the fuck out.
It’s not their fault. It’s progression.” Marty was like a preacher in his pulpit shouting about fire and brimstone.
His passion—his rage—was felt in every word.
Everything he said sounded like something out of a bad movie, and yet it actually made a weird kind of sense.
Mom always said that Dad ran off with another woman, and I never questioned why. He was simply the asshole who abandoned his family.
But maybe I should have. What had Mom done to drive him away?
Maybe she wasn’t the kind of wife my dad needed.
Mom never missed a shift of work no matter how sick or tired she was, but how many awards ceremonies had she not attended?
How many field trips? Had my dad felt like that?
Like his needs were always coming second to hers?
Maybe the real problem was this “progressive bullshit” Marty was talking about. It was definitely food for thought. Just not a thought I’d ever say out loud to anyone else.
“I do love a strong woman, though—one just like yours.” He winked as if we were on the same page.
“Nothing better than breaking her. Like a wild horse, you have to ride ’em till they don’t have a mind of their own anymore.
” He laughed hard at his joke. I laughed, too, though maybe I shouldn’t have.
“It’s the best rush there is. Better than beer.
Better than drugs. Better than just about anything. ”
There was a gleam of something dark in his eyes that sent a shiver of trepidation down my spine.
“Women like that don’t think that’s how they want to be treated, but let me tell you something, Rhett, that’s a lie they tell themselves. They want to be tamed. They want to be controlled. They want you to be the man and put them in their place.”
My muscles felt tense as Marty’s words took an insidious hold one small piece at a time.
“Women want to be chased. No matter how far or how fast they run, they want to know that you will find them—that you will hunt them down no matter where they go.”
My breathing was shallow and I felt dizzy. I let his words infect me like a disease.
“A woman like that needs to know she will always belong to you. And she’ll love every minute of the life you give her, because that’s her place.”
Marty was staring directly at me, his expression serious. He was so forthright that it unnerved me at the same time it made my skin crawl.
And yet, I found myself agreeing with at least some of his sentiments, regardless of how they made me feel.
Women did love the thrill of the chase, didn’t they?
And what was wrong with more traditional roles? Wasn’t that why I was putting myself through law school? So I could provide for my mom and Lucy? So I could be the man of my household?
And if that was true, then what right did Lucy, or any other woman for that matter, have to tell me what I could and couldn’t do?
This time, it was my own dark thoughts that unnerved me.
The truth was I knew Lucy would never be content letting me run the show. Her mother was the same. Even though Mr. Herbaugh made the money, it was Mabel who ran the house. I had no doubt Lucy would be the same way.
But Jenn seemed different. There was an innocence about her that was incredibly attractive. She appeared timid and unsure, even as she was trying to figure out her life on her own. I could tell, from the conversations we’d had, that she really wanted someone to direct her.
She and Lucy were complete opposites. Jenn needed someone to guide the ship, and Lucy was already steering it.
Marty suddenly clasped me on the shoulder. “You need another beer, buddy.” He pulled another bottle out of his backpack and handed it to me. “Man, this thing is high up,” he said, peering down from the top of the cliff.
I followed his gaze. I felt dizzy as I stared at the tiny matchbox town below. “It’s more dangerous up here than people realize. It’s not just a pretty view.”
“I’m sure it is.” Marty threw his empty bottle over the edge. I jumped at the sound of it shattering on the rocks below. “This is a good time, man. We should do it more often.”
I smiled. “Definitely.”
The conversation with Marty had my mind in turmoil.
Maybe I needed to start telling Lucy how things were going to be instead of the other way around. Then maybe Mr. Herbaugh would respect me more.
Everything Marty said felt so wrong. I thought of myself as a modern man who believed women deserved to be treated as equals. That Lucy would be my partner because that’s how it should be. I was raised by a single mom who did everything for me.
I was an enlightened man, goddamn it!
And yet, somewhere deep down, the rightness of Marty’s words were heavy and sticky like tar.
But like any radical idea, once it took root, there was no getting rid of it.
I just didn’t know what it meant for Lucy.
Or for me.