Chapter Eight #2
“Whatever you have going on up there, it isn’t real, Hanna.
We are real. My love for you is real. This moment is real.
Don’t let tomorrow’s problems take away your chance to be happy and in the moment.
Stay with me. I’ll carry your anxieties for you if you let me.
I know that’s hard for you, and you don’t have to do it all at once.
For now, just be here with me and we’ll have a wonderful afternoon in a beautiful spot.
Don’t let your demons steal that.” I nod, letting a few more tears trickle down.
“I’m here,” I say with a genuine smile, taking his hand again and squeezing. He squeezes back before handing me a granola bar.
“Also, I think this will help.” I take it happily. He isn’t wrong. All coffee and no food is never a good idea for me.
“When and where did you even get this?”
“Oh, I always have a Hanna snack on hand, in case of an emergency.”
“My hero,” I tease as I open it, devouring it in just a couple of bites.
_____
We hike for another hour before I start getting antsy again. The snack helped but between the unusual amount of activity and the crying, I’m starting to get tired and hungry.
“Are we there yet?” I whine. “I’m officially upset we didn’t have my super-nova coffee.”
“I’m impressed that this is the first time you’ve asked.
I made a secret bet with myself that you would have asked me at least 5 times by now.
I owe myself a lot of money. As a reward for your hard work, I’m pleased to tell you we are pretty much there.
” He stops, setting his backpack down and starts digging through it, pulling out a sleeping mask. “I need you to put this on.”
“What? Why?” I cross my arms, taking a quick step back.
“Just do it, Hanna. Remember–live a little.” He closes the space between us and pulls the mask over my head.
I whine but don’t fight him on it. He takes my hand and leads me forward, being very intentional with his instructions and I somehow manage to trip LESS than usual, even though I’m blindfolded.
After a few minutes, he tells me to stop and all I hear is rustling and clinking.
“What are you doing? Can I take this off now? I’m getting claustrophobic!”
“Okay, drama queen. Take it off.” I pull the mask off and at first, I’m blinded by the sunlight, but once my eyes settle, I’m speechless by the nature around me.
There’s a huge, slow-moving river with flowers and moss growing all around it.
I don’t know what sort of flowers grow in this weather, but they are beautiful, especially with the sun glittering off the water.
It’s so clear that I can see the giant rocks laying across the bottom; they look like a bridge to the other side.
When I look down, Luke has set up an actual picnic, complete with a blanket, all sorts of treats, wine and to my surprise… our swimsuits.
“First, this is so sweet. I can’t believe you carried all of this out here and this spot…
it’s unbelievable.” I gesture to the river.
“I don’t know what I was thinking was going to be out here but not this.
Second, what do you think we will be doing with those?
” I ask while pointing at the swimsuits.
“You said you always wanted to do a cold plunge.” He sits himself down on the blanket and pats the ground next to him. I walk over and sit next to him, looking over with all the drama I can muster.
“Hypothetically.”
“Oh, come on. It’s beautiful here. It’ll be worth it, you’ll see.”
“Uh huh. I’ll think about it.”
“The wine will convince,” he winks as he opens the bottle. He hands me a blue, steel camping mug filled almost to the top.
“Very cute and very on-brand.” I take a sip and the alcohol gives me the illusion of being warmer. As I continue to drink my wine, I gaze around at the beautiful views around us when suddenly in the distance I notice a tall tower of some sort. It looks to be metal with an enclosed room at the top.
“What’s that over there?” I ask as I point to the tall structure.
Luke looks over with a relaxed, lazy move of his head.
“It’s probably a fire tower. You sometimes find them in remote wooded areas.
My dad always used to tell me that's where I should go if I were to ever get lost while we were camping. He would know to find me there. Plus there’s usually a radio or first-aid kit and sometimes even some emergency food… like the freeze dried meals you love.”
“Huh. Good to know. So if I get lost on this long, cold hike… will you come save me?”
"Yes, of course I would.”
“Thank you.” I wait for a moment before asking him, probably for the twentieth time, “And if I was a worm… would you still love me?” I can barely get the question out before Luke lurches forward and playfully tackles me.
He grabs my hands and pins them above my head with only one of his hands and covers my mouth with his other.
“Stop. Please. I’ve answered this every way I can think of and you’re still not satisfied. This is the last time I’ll entertain this…” He takes a dramatic deep breath before continuing, looking down at me with a mixture of sincerity and playfulness. “If you’re a worm… I’m a worm.”
_____
Quicker than we should, we finish the entire bottle and most of the snacks before my buzzed brain decides it's now or never to potentially… freeze to death. I stand up and grab my swimsuit. “Where do I change?” Luke stares at me blankly before bursting into laughter.
“Right here? It’s just us and I happen to consider myself an expert at what your body looks like.” The thought of getting naked outside makes me feel on edge, even though it’s obviously the only place to do so.
“Yeah, I’m sure you do.” I hesitate for a second but eventually give in and start getting undressed.
There is an intense feeling of someone’s eyes being on me, but when I look over at Luke, he is facing the other way.
I glance around, holding my shirt up against my chest. Stop being so paranoid.
This is the time to be brave. I finish taking all my clothes off and as I start to put my swimsuit on, I instead obey an impetuous thought to leave it behind.
I run to the water, completely naked and scared out of my mind.
Right before I step in, I hear Luke whistle at me.
“Hot damn, woman. We’re having wine more often.”
“When in Rome,” I laugh and take a small step into the freezing water. With a shriek, I step right back out. “Oh my god. That’s way worse than I thought it would be.”
“Don’t talk yourself out of it!” Luke is quickly next to me, grabbing onto me and pulling me in after him.
I squeal and plead for him to let me go but to no avail.
He pulls me all the way into the water and holds me close to him.
Panic starts to take over when I can’t get a full breath.
“Look at me. Breathe. In and out. Slow. You’re okay.
” He guides me in taking a few deep breaths until my lungs start filling themselves up at a steadier, easier pace.
“We can get out now.” Those are the magic words.
I push away from him and dart out of the water.
A moment later, he is next to me laying a towel over my shaking shoulders.
I dry off and get dressed as fast as possible, but even with all my clothes on, I’m still shivering.
“Here,” Luke says as he hands me a beanie.
“You seriously fit all this into your bag? Who are you, Mary Poppins?” He just laughs.
“That’s Mr. Poppins to you. Stay here and try to relax. I’m going to go get some wood and build us a fire. Once we’re warmed up, we can head back.”