6. Jareth
“Damn it.” I strode from Hazel’s bedroom toward the kitchen as though the fires of hell nipped at my heels. Sweat beaded my brow at the thought of her delectable body pressed against mine. Her soft, plump lips being ravaged by my own. I knew if I gave in to the desire raging through me, I would not stop this time.
The hope in her eyes was like a shining beacon drawing me in. I’d been so close to losing my tight control over my emotions. No one made me falter. Except it seemed, Hazel. I’d hidden my growing attraction to her until the Christmas party. That fateful night ripped off the blindfold that I’d allowed her to wear, to think that I felt nothing toward her except our current boss-employee relationship.
My perception of her had drastically shifted two months ago. I’d walked up behind her while a dating site was displayed on her computer screen. The moment I realized it was hers, jealousy, an emotion I was unused to feeling, ripped through my body, shocking me. The need to possess her, to make sure no other man touched her but me, was my only thought. My instincts brought it down to one word: Mine.
There was no way I’d allow anything to happen between us again. That one kiss was all there would ever be. Eventually, Hazel would give up and find someone else. She was all that was good in this world. Even though her childhood was less than ideal, she grew up believing in the positivity of life. I’d lost that same optimism years ago.
Finally reaching the kitchen, I placed my palms on the cool gray granite surface and leaned forward, my head hanging down until my chin practically touched my chest. I breathed in and out, slowly gathering myself and replacing the mental armor I used to shield my emotions from others. Most people thought of me as a cold, emotionless bastard. It was a fa?ade I’d painstakingly created over the years. People didn’t fuck me over because they knew I’d stop at nothing to return the favor. I was ruthless in my single-minded determination.
There was no light in my life.
No hope. No room for a relationship.
I was better off alone.
It suited my desire for revenge and didn’t give my enemies leverage to hold over me. Hazel deserved a life filled with joy, laughter, and happiness. All things I couldn’t give her.
I pulled off my suit jacket and let it rest on the back of a nearby chair placed at the island before me. With quick fingers, I released the cufflinks at my wrists and rolled up the sleeves of my dress shirt. The black ink etched into my arms reminded me of where my focus needed to be. The reason why I’d built my empire.
Each symbol stood for a letter of the alphabet or a phrase, a secret language my father and I had created together, one I used to develop stark reminders on my skin—power, revenge, justice—were the first three I’d had tattooed at the age of eighteen only hours after my father’s body had been found in the factory he once worked. The factory owned by Jessamine Sulton’s parents. The people responsible for his death.
The Sultons hadn’t worked alone. Neither of them liked to get their hands dirty. They preferred to hire someone for that. I had a sneaking suspicion they had help in making my father’s death look like a suicide. Without proof, I was a kid they were able to brush aside, and they were able to get away with murder.
Each muscle in my body tensed. I didn’t want Hazel mixed up in my revenge. She deserved that fairytale-type romance and family. At twenty-six, she had her whole life ahead of her. Her sparkle didn’t need to be dulled by a man twelve years her senior, jaded by his experiences. Poisoned by his need to make the people responsible for my father’s death pay. I needed to remember that when her forest green gaze drew me in, and her body made for sin had my cock sit up and take notice.
My phone buzzed with an incoming text. I yanked it out of my pocket and swiped the screen.
JESS
Did she love it all?
JARETH
I’m sure she does.
JESS
Didn’t you stick around to find out? I purchased her the perfect wardrobe, and that’s all you have to say?
JARETH
If you want to know what she thinks, message her.
JESS
I think even you would appreciate some of what I got {blowing kiss emoji}
I ran a hand down my face.
JARETH
Do I even want to know?
JESS
Well, since you were a dick and didn’t look at any of it, I guess it’ll be a surprise.
I had a feeling the less I knew, the better. When Jess didn’t respond with anything else, I pulled up the number for an Asian fusion place Hazel loved. They didn’t typically offer delivery, but for me and the tip I gave, they found someone to bring me my food.
I sat at the island giving myself time to shore up my defenses before Hazel came back into the room. If my attraction was only physical, I’d be able to easily ignore her. It was how she burrowed her way into my psyche, how not just my body but my soul craved her. She didn’t need my darkness tainting any part of her.
I groaned and ran a hand down my face. I needed to pull my shit together.
When the buzzer at the front door went off I realized what had felt like five minutes was more like thirty. I grabbed the food and placed it on the dining room table before heading into the kitchen to grab plates from the cabinet.
“Hey,” Hazel said, her sweet voice washing over me.
Thirty minutes on the dot. Hazel was nothing less than prompt. She hesitated in the doorway, her fingers curling around the sleeves of her dark green soft-looking leisurewear top. For a second, I’d feared what clothing she might appear in after Jess’s last comment.
“Hey,” I repeated. “I set up the food in the dining room.” A room I hardly ever used. Eating while standing was my usual MO at home, but that didn’t seem appropriate for Hazel.
“Can I do anything?” She moved slowly into the room and gestured at the glasses sitting on the island. Her initial hesitation disappeared.
A flash of frustration ate at me. I knew her hesitation was because of the moment we shared in the closet. Of the mixed signals I continued to give her. “Not at all. Why don’t you go ahead of me? What would you like to drink?” I had bottles of expensive wine at the ready and a particular brand I knew Hazel enjoyed.
“Water’s fine.” She gave me a tiny smile before turning toward the dining room.
Fuck me.
My eyes eagerly drank in the backside of her seemingly loose outfit. The shirt dipped into a deep V in the back with a single string across the top holding the sides together. While seeing her pale skin made me want to lick and nip at the exposed skin, creating the electricity that constantly sparked between us, it was the pants that made my cock jump. They hugged her ass, flowing over the rounded globes as though explicitly made for her. With each step, the fabric tightened and shifted. I clenched my fist hard to stop myself from giving in to my desire to run my hands over such perfection.
I snatched up the glasses, filled them, and headed in after her.
She sat at the right side of the long table where I’d placed the take-out containers and a plate. Her eyes lit up when she noticed the various dishes on display before her. “My favorites. How did you… ” She paused.
I loved and hated the appreciation that caused the corners of her eyes to crinkle and her lips to curl into a grateful smile. I wanted to be the one who put that expression on her face, except it was a glaring reminder of how big the little things were to her, that she didn’t just expect her favorite food to be laid out before her. She was so used to taking care of every other damn person in her life she often forgot about herself.
I shrugged. “A lucky guess, I assure you.” Why I couldn’t just admit that months ago, well before my feelings had changed towards her, she’d ordered from this place when we worked late and let it casually slip how much she loved their food. She had no idea that for years, I’d filed away most of what she’d said.
I did this with every person I met.
Although, with Hazel, it was to surprise her with the small things she savored. I should have realized before now that I treated her differently. Typically, I used the information I gathered to exert control and effectively manipulate the other person. Not to find ways to make them happy.
A smile still curved at the corner of her lips. “This is what I keep telling you to do.”
I placed a glass by her plate and sat across from her. My brows tugged together as I frowned.
“If you used your powers for good like this, you’d be so much happier, Jareth.” Clearly, I’d fooled only myself with the assumption that she didn’t know what I’d done. Moments like this confirmed she saw more than most with me. How the layers I’d built around myself didn’t deter her.
I chose not to respond and began to plate food for her and myself, making sure she had plenty of her favorites. When I was done, I sat back in the uncomfortable hard-backed chair and took a bite. Now, I had another reason to avoid this room. The seats were a fucking nightmare.
“Thank you.” She smiled again at me before popping a crab rangoon into her mouth. The smile quickly disappeared as she moaned in delight. My body tensed at the unintentionally erotic sound. “This is so good. I haven’t had it in forever.”
I shoved another forkful into my mouth. I only had to get through dinner. After this, I’d avoid any other mealtimes with her. At work, I could keep my focus on the task at hand. Here in my home, my attention was glued to her. I couldn’t have her distracting me like this.
She shifted in the seat, wincing, and muttered something about interior designers.
I raised my eyebrow when she met my gaze.
A faint flush stained her cheeks. “So, what do you usually do after dinner?”
What I always did. “Work.”
“Oh, okay.” A slight frown marred her lips.
Immediately, I wanted to do whatever it took to make it disappear. Dangerous thoughts that I needed to avoid. Yet clearly, self-preservation had taken a flying leap from my penthouse window. “Why?”
She fiddled with her fork, her downcast eyes tugging at me. “It’s nothing.”
“Hazel.” Just that one word had her head snapping up as I’d intended. I had not considered what the unexpected tears pooled in her eyes would do to me.
When she didn’t respond right away, I decided to wait her out. Silence was not something Hazel did well with. She blew out a breath. “It’s only a few weeks until Christmas.”
I tipped my chin in acknowledgment. I was well aware of the date on the calendar.
“You haven’t decorated at all, and I was thinking that maybe we could do that tonight.” She bit her lip.
“I have more important things to do, Hazel, but if you would enjoy putting up decorations, don’t let me stop you.”
She nodded and quickly averted her gaze, but not before I saw the first tear fall.
Damn it!
My fingers wrapped around the empty dish in front of me. It wasn’t my concern if she was upset that I wouldn’t do this with her. Just one more reminder of how we wouldn’t work. She had to understand I was a busy man. I didn’t have time for such frivolous things.
“Right.” Her breath hitched, and she discreetly wiped at her cheeks.
I let out a breath, and against my better judgment ignored the warning signs blaring through my head. “This is important to you?”
She shrugged, keeping her face averted. I hated that she felt the need to hide from me.
“Hazel, look at me,” I demanded. When her tear-filled gaze met my own, a small part of my hardened heart twitched to life. “Why?” I couldn’t understand why this would be important enough to bring her to tears.
A shaky breath escaped her lips. “It’s the first year my grandmother is in assisted living. I’m used to doing all the Christmas stuff with her. Being surrounded by the decorations and continuing her holiday traditions, it helps make me feel less alone.”
Well, fuck me. I’d asked, didn’t I?
“I’ve decorated my house, but not knowing when I’ll be home… ” She trailed off. Her hand swiped at her face once more. “It’s hard to feel like Christmas without the decorations.”
“And it’ll make you happy if we decorate my penthouse?” When was the last time I cared about anyone’s happiness?
She nodded. “It’s so much more fun with someone else.”
I let out a long breath. I knew I’d regret this. If not today, then another one soon enough. “And you want me to help you?”
She nodded again, the slightest smile gracing her mouth and that damn hopeful look back in her eyes.
“Fine,” I growled.
“You won’t regret it,” she promised, jumping up from her seat, wincing slightly. “Have you, um, ever thought about getting something else for this room?”
“This is the first time I’ve sat at the table,” I admitted.
“It might be time for a new dining room set.” She grabbed the plates and silverware while I held the takeout containers. I walked into the kitchen ahead of her just so I wouldn’t be distracted by the tempting sway of her ass.
She started for the sink as I neared the trash. “Don’t you dare.” She pointed a handful of silverware at me. We’d had many discussions surrounding leftovers. Mainly focusing on the fact that I didn’t eat them. “I’ll eat it tomorrow for lunch. And seriously, you spent a small fortune for one meal. Don’t be all billionairey.”
I stopped short. “Billionairey?”
Hazel nodded and pushed her blonde hair behind her ears. Without missing a beat, she placed the dishes in the sink and started to rinse off the silverware. I was about to tell her not to bother, the maid would be in to take care of it in the morning when she replied. “Yes. The ‘I’m so rich I can just toss out perfectly good food because money is no object.’ Some of us need to watch our pennies, and I won’t pass up a free lunch.” She went back to the dishes, now loading them in the dishwasher.
I frowned. “You do realize I didn’t always have money. There were days when I couldn’t afford to eat and had to fight to keep a roof over my head?”
“Then let’s go back to those penny-pinching ways.” She began to root around in my cabinets.
“What could you possibly be looking for?” I placed the containers of food on the island.
“Your leftover containers. If you’ve forgotten what those are, they’re plastic or glass containers that most of us use to store food and bring our lunch to work in.” Her lips twitched with her sassy words.
“I’m well aware of what those are.” I waved my hand toward a cupboard on the far side of the kitchen. “You can find something in there.” My maid often washed out containers from food I’d ordered and stored them there. I was rarely in here and often forgot she’d done that.
Hazel opened the cabinet, stuffed her arms full of containers, and then plopped them down onto the countertop. While she opened a few and set the lids aside, I went back to the dining room to get the remainder of our meal.
When I returned, I leaned against the doorway to the kitchen. Hazel sang softly as she scooped a portion of everything into two containers. She looked beautiful. Her hips swayed in time to her song making me want to run my hands over them and down her thick thighs. To lift her gorgeous body onto the countertop and feast on every delectable inch of her. To mark her so that everyone knew she was mine.
This wasn’t the first time Hazel had been in my penthouse, but tonight she helped make it feel like something more. Old feelings of wanting a home and family tugged at my heart and made me wish for a different life. One where I could pursue a relationship with Hazel without any reservations.
She smiled when she saw me, and I missed hearing her sing. She had a beautiful voice. “Now we’re both all set for lunch tomorrow.” Her narrow-eyed glance had me wondering if she was waiting for my objection.
Instead of answering, I placed the rest of the food on the counter, closed the lids on the containers, and scooped the remaining food into the waiting empty ones. With a satisfied hum, Hazel shifted the leftovers to my refrigerator. It didn’t escape my notice when she quietly tsked at how empty it was.
She wanted a normal life with a normal boyfriend. As hard as it was going to be living with her while her place got fixed, maybe this would be the final act to show her that she was better off with someone else.
And even as I thought those blasphemous words, my chest tightened at how easy and domestic this whole night felt and how quickly I shoved the bit of longing that hit me into the deep, dark crevice of my mind.