Chapter Twenty
TRISSA
M y hands trembled as I pushed past the locksmiths into the hallway to dial Killian’s number again.
This time he picked up. “You can’t do this,” I seethed
“You made the choice to stay there.” His tone was maddeningly calm, as if his actions were perfectly reasonable.
“I rent, Killian. You’re going to make me lose my deposit. What if the landlord tells me I have to move out for destruction of property?” I was going to murder him. How dare he make such drastic changes without my permission.
“He won’t.” His certainty only fueled my anger.
“You don’t know that.” I practically screeched through the phone, beyond caring how desperate I sounded.
“Yes I do, Tink.” His words echoed in the phone as though …
I looked up and there he was, standing a mere few feet away down the hall, his imposing figure blocking the dim overhead light and filling the space. The muscles he often hid under a leather jacket or a hoodie were on full display in the tight black t-shirt he wore. My newfound attraction to him surged and I wanted to run my fingers up and over each tattoo, memorizing each line, curve, and design.
The locksmiths doing their thing forced me deeper into the hallway and the clinking of metal at the door began to override whatever insane attraction I was feeling.
I ended the call and marched over to Killian, grabbed his arm, and dragged him through the men working and into my apartment. For the second time today, I was manhandling a guy who could easily overpower me, but I was beyond caring.
I didn’t stop until we reached my bedroom, slamming the door shut behind us.
“Tink, if you wanted me in your bedroom, all you had to do was ask.” He smirked, his eyes twinkling with mischief and something darker, more intense.
“Oh, shut up.” I ran a hand through my hair, trying to ignore the way my attraction was affecting me physically. This confined space hadn’t seemed this small earlier. “You can’t replace my locks. I signed a contract that specifically stated I would not make any changes without permission.”
I paced, needing to put some distance between us before I did something stupid, like kiss that infuriating smirk off his face. And having that unexpected thought alone was enough to send me in a tizzy.
“I think he’ll make an exception for you.” The tone of his voice had me stop in my tracks, a suspicion forming in my mind.
Hold up. “Killian, why did you say it like that?”
“Like what?” He relaxed against the door, his arms loosely crossed over his abdomen.
“What did you do? Did you bribe my landlord?” I asked, almost afraid to hear the answer.
He shrugged, the casual demeanor at odds with the intensity in his eyes. “No need. I decided to diversify.”
“Diversify?” I rolled my lips into my mouth as I considered his choice of words. “You didn’t … ” I stopped mid-sentence, my words rising an octave. Why in all of this madness would he buy this property? It didn’t make sense. “You wouldn’t.”
He grinned, looking entirely too pleased with himself. “I did.”
“You can’t just buy a building because you want to make changes to one apartment.” The sentence came out in a rush.
“I don’t see why not.” His nonchalance was tempting my temper.
“Oh, my God. I don’t even know what to do with you right now.” My pulse pounded in my ears as I stared at him in disbelief, torn between outrage at his high-handedness and a traitorous flutter of warmth at the lengths he was willing to go to protect me.
Killian backed me up to the door. My heart pounded wildly as he pressed into me. His hand cupped my neck as his thumb traced a lazy pattern over my throat. The gentle yet dominant touch sent sparks through me making it impossible to think straight.
“If you weren’t going to take your safety seriously, someone had to.” His voice was low, harsh, and he stared into my eyes with an intensity that teased a shiver down my spine.
“Killian. You bought a building.” I struggled to sound coherent as his touch drove me to distraction. Part of me was flattered that he’d go to this extreme to keep me safe, but another part rebelled against the implication that I couldn’t take care of myself.
“I did.” His simple confirmation hung in the air between us, charged with unspoken tension.
I sighed, unable to resist leaning into his touch. My hands lifted of their own accord to rest on his pecs, hard beneath his shirt. The fast but steady beat of his heart beneath my palms revealed he was as much affected as I was. We were so close, that when he exhaled, his warm minty breath feathered across my lips. I drew in a deep gulp of his subtle scent. Sandalwood and something uniquely him engulfed me and made me want to bury my face in his shirt to see if the scent was stronger there.
“If it’s going to appear that we’re dating, no one would believe I’d let you stay here with your apartment the way it is.” The statement was slightly insulting, but held an undercurrent of possessiveness that both thrilled and unsettled me.
It took more than a second for me to register what he’d said, my brain still foggy by his nearness. “Oh. Right. Of course.” I managed. So this was about our image as a couple, not his attraction to me? I couldn’t deny how disappointed that made me feel.
Was that all this was? Keeping up appearances? And why did I care? This was all fake anyway.
I searched his face for a clue, something that might tell me how he really felt. His eyes were dark and heated, and for a moment, I thought I caught a flash of vulnerability there. But before I could be sure, he blinked, and it was gone.
“Tink,” he murmured, his voice rough with an emotion I couldn’t quite place. His thumb moved up the line of my jaw and I stilled. “I won’t risk your safety.”
I swallowed hard, caught between the desire to argue and the urge to close the miniscule distance between us. “I can take care of myself, Killian,” I whispered, but even I could hear my lack of conviction.
He leaned in closer, his forehead nearly touching mine. “I know you can, but while we’re together, you don’t have to.”
I was touched at the raw honesty in his words. I felt myself wavering, my determination to remain independent crumbling in the face of his concern.
Because a small part of me wanted someone to take care of me. “I … ” I started, not sure what to say. Argue? Give in? Thank him?
Before I could decide, a loud crash from the living room shattered the moment. We both froze, tension of a different kind filling the air.
“Stay here,” Killian ordered, his tone taking on that deliciously dangerous edge again.
As he reached for the door handle, I grabbed his arm. “This is my apartment, remember?”
For a moment, I thought he might argue, but then a small smile tugged at his lip. “I’ll go first,” he conceded.
He probably only gave in because he knew Max was nearby and could back him up.
Killian slipped into the living room with me trailing right behind.
My jaw dropped at the scene that greeted us.
“What the hell?” I sputtered, noticing my end table on its side and a large ladder next to it. My gaze darted around the room, taking in the mess and the additional strangers in my apartment. “Killian! What are these people doing?”
A trio of men in power suits flanked Killian, ready to do his bidding. They looked harmless, but their vibe projected the professionalism of high-level hired security. They looked between Killian and me, their lack of response a clear indication they didn’t want to get caught in the crossfire.
I noticed a camera dangling from one man’s fingertips. “Oh, hell no.” I turned on Killian. “Not inside my apartment.”
“Tink, be—” Killian started, but I cut him off, despising his placating tone.
I balled up my hand and punched his stomach, holding back a wince at how hard it was. “I’m going to stop you right there before you say something you’ll regret even more.”
I marched up to the man and yanked the camera out of his hands, ignoring the startled look on his face. I was on a roll. I hadn’t stood up for myself like this in I couldn’t tell you how long. “We won’t be needing this.”
Killian opened his mouth, but I cut him off with a glare that I hope could’ve melted steel.
“I want everyone gone. Now!” I demanded. My hands trembled as I pointed to the door. My brave, hear-me-roar persona began to fade as the men held their ground. It was a stark reminder they waited for Killian’s command, not mine.
“Tink,” Killian growled.
“There are new locks on the door, a camera outside. If you want to continue any of this … ” I gestured between us, not wanting to let on about our arrangement to fake date. “we’re done.”
Tension tightened the muscles in Killian’s neck, setting his jaw as he stared at me. For a moment, I thought he might argue, and a part of me wanted him to—wanted an excuse to unleash all the pent-up frustration and confusion I’d been feeling. But then his eyes shifted, and he barked, “Everyone out.”
The workers scrambled to gather their tools, practically tripping over themselves in their haste to leave. Max hesitated at the door, his gaze flicking between Killian and me.
“You too,” Killian sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I’ll let you know later when to return.”
“Got it.” Max nodded at me, a hint of respect in his eyes, before quietly leaving.
As the door closed behind him, the silence in the apartment reached deafening. I turned to Killian and crossed my arms tightly. Narrowing my eyes at him, I pressed my lips into a thin line and waited for him to explain.
“Tink—”
“Killian! You do not get to dictate everything in my life just because we’re pretending to be together,” I said, keeping my voice quiet yet firm. “I won’t stand for it. I won’t lose my independence.”
He regarded me for a long moment with an unreadable expression. Then to my surprise, he sank onto the couch wearily. Lines I hadn’t noticed before were etched around his mouth, and his shoulders dipped lower than usual. “I know,” he said, unable to hide his aggravation from me. “I don’t want to take that from you. But I also don’t want anything happening to you, Tink. I’m still not one hundred percent sure no one saw you on the yacht. I’ll do whatever I think I need to do to prevent you getting hurt.”
The absolute certainty in how he inserted himself into my life after all this time caught me off guard. I sat down next to him, careful to leave some space between us. “I understand that,” I said, gentling my tone. “But I need my independence, too. You come in here and strong-arm me to add security measures with Max as a bodyguard and expect me to just be okay with it. But it makes me feel like I have no control over my life.”
Killian nodded, his eyes meeting mine.
I noticed he didn’t say anything about backing off or feeling like he overstepped.
Suddenly, I realized that letting the guys leave before they installed cameras inside was his compromise. It wasn’t much, but it was something. “Where do we go from here?”
He shrugged. “I’m hiring a permanent bodyguard for you.”
“Killian … ” We’d been together more often than not since he agreed to help me. When we were younger, Killian needed to be in control. Is that what this was? Was keeping me safe the one thing he could control in this situation, and if so, was it why he held on so tight to his off-the-wall possessive safety measures?
“Tink, even if you don’t believe being Peter’s assistant puts you in danger. A relationship with me might … ” He hesitated and I knew in my gut he was holding back something significant. “I’m not taking chances with you. Understood?”
I nodded. A bodyguard was a little much without there being a direct threat, though. “I hear what you’re saying, and maybe we can come up with a compromise.”
His eyes widened a fraction then narrowed. “A compromise?”
A tiny smile curved my lips. He might be going a little overboard, but I knew it was because he cared. Deep down, he was a big softie. He just didn’t want anyone to realize it. “Let’s start smaller. I don’t need someone to shadow me all the time. You don’t even have bodyguards present every second of the day.”
He stared at me. “Because I have Max.”
Given Max’s size, I should’ve realized before now he did double duty.
He let out a sigh. “My final offer. I’ll hire someone to drive you around, but they’ll have the knowledge and skills to protect you if needed.”
“So, a sort of bodyguard.” I tapped my chin in thought. “They won’t follow me everywhere?”
After a long pause, he nodded.
“Compromise accepted.” I flashed him a happy grin. I couldn’t remember the last time someone had cared so much for my safety. As independent as I was, a secret thrill at being cared about so much stirred within me. And the hard truth was, I kind of liked it.
Killian kicked off his shoes and stretched out on my sofa. He barely fit on it, and it was extra-long to begin with because of my height. The sight of him making himself at home in my space sent a confusing mix of emotions through me—annoyance, attraction, and a strange sense of rightness that I quickly pushed away.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
He smirked and pulled out his phone to send a text. The casual way he did it, as if he belonged here, made my heartrate pick up. “Getting comfortable,” he replied, in a low rumble that seemed to vibrate in the room.
“Why?” I averted my gaze, determined to ignore how his t-shirt stretched across his sculpted pecs as he relaxed into the cushions.
Or how for a split second I wanted to curl up next to him.
“I thought I’d relax while I wait for Max to bring me my stuff for tonight.” His eyes met mine, a challenge glinting in their depths.
“Your stuff?” I sounded like a parrot repeating him, but I couldn’t process what he was saying.
“Until I hire someone to follow you permanently, I guess that job falls to me.” The casualness in his tone belied the serious look on his face. “I’ll move in with you instead.”
My face burned at his boldness. “But I have to work, and so do you. You can’t just stay here indefinitely. And besides, if you’re following me, and Max is following you … This is sounding more like a weird, messed up nursery rhyme.” My voice pitched more than I intended, betraying my rising panic.
“I’m confident I’ll have someone by tomorrow, but until then, I guess we’re having a sleepover.” The word sleepover spoken from Killian’s lips stirred me to my core. Why was that so hot? And why did everything Killian do seem to turn me on all of a sudden?
“We’re not having a sleepover,” I sputtered, not sure whether to be excited to have this time with him or be annoyed at his presumption that a sleepover would be acceptable.
However … The thought of Killian spending the night, of waking up to find him here, was both thrilling and terrifying.
“What are we having for lunch?” he asked casually, completely ignoring my protest. I fisted my hands onto my hips. This conversation was spiraling and I needed to regain some control over the situation. “Is this what a relationship with you is like?” The words came out before I could stop them, and I wished I could take them back or reframe the question. That was the least in control question I could’ve uttered.
This wasn’t going to be a real relationship between us, and I needed to remember that.
He grinned, his smile transforming his face. For a moment, I caught a glimpse of the boy from long ago, hidden beneath the hardened exterior of the man sprawled on my sofa before me.
The curve of his lips felt so familiar it tugged at my heart. Memories of shared laughter and joy flooded my mind. What in the world was I getting myself into by agreeing to fake date Killian?
I took a deep breath, to center myself. “Killian, we need to talk about boundaries.”
His smile faded slightly, replaced by a scowl. “Boundaries?”
“Yes, boundaries,” I sunk into the worn armchair across from him. “If we’re going to make this work, we need to establish some ground rules.”
Killian sat up, his elbows resting on his knees as his shuttered eyes met mine. “I’m listening.”
I swallowed hard, suddenly remembering how intense his gaze could be. “You don’t make unilateral decisions about my life. We discuss them first.”
He opened his mouth to protest.
I held up my hand. “I’m not saying I won’t consider your suggestions, but I can’t have you steamroll over me.”
Killian’s jaw clenched. “I’ll try. Anything else?”
“We need to also be clear about … physical boundaries.” I squirmed in my seat. Even though my face and chest were on fire, I forced myself to continue. “If we’re going to convince people we’re dating, we’ll probably need to have some, um, contact.” Why was this so difficult to talk about? “We should know what each other is comfortable with.”
Something flashed in Killian’s eyes too quickly for me to interpret. “Agreed,” he said hoarsely. “Anything else?”
I took a deep breath. “We need to be honest with each other. No hidden agendas, no secrets that could hurt the other person. Deal?”
Killian was quiet for a moment, his eyes never leaving mine. Finally, he nodded. “Deal.”
As we sat there, the air charged with unspoken tension and I couldn’t help but wonder if I was setting myself up for pain. Because as much as I was attempting to keep us at a distance, I felt drawn to Killian in new and surprising ways that had nothing to do with our fake relationship.
Knocking on the door made me jump. Killian stood, his movement fluid and graceful. “That’ll be Max with my things.” He must have had a bag packed in his car already.
Jerk.
As he went to answer the door, I stayed seated, thinking things over. What had started as a simple favor was quickly becoming complicated. And while I watched Killian interact with Max, his protective instincts on full display, I realized I was headed for dangerous territory.
Because as much as I’d deny it, with every last breath in my body, Killian acting possessive and domineering had awakened something deep within me that I didn’t know what to do with.
Or what it meant between us.