Chapter 46 Make Love To Me
Chapter forty-six
Make Love To Me
I hold her close as we make the short ride back to the resort in silence, the sexual tension between the two of us palpable.
Our fingers are entwined, and every now and then I bring her hand up to kiss her soft skin, letting my lips linger against the pulse of her wrist. It flutters fast. I relate.
Desire hums just below the surface of my skin, thrumming through my blood, and making me hyper aware of every little fidget and move she makes.
I help her out of the car, settling my palm against the curve of her lower back, and the quietness continues as we make the short journey to our room. We're scared to talk.
To break this new, fragile bit of possibility between us.
When we exit the elevator and into the hallway, she stares up at me with such a look of longing that it takes what's left of my breath away.“God, baby. Me too,” I murmur quietly.
Forced painfully face-to-face with my values, I'm at war with myself.
Tamping down the desires of my body is proving harder and harder, but I find myself weakening.
Everything about Sarah chips away at my stoic resolve, leaving me emotionally and mentally floundering.
My heart pounds as I pull her to the room with a hand around her wrist. Jamming the keycard in the door, I begin to pray, hearing her pant softly next to me.
I stiffen when she presses herself into my arm, and her breasts nestle softly against me.
God, just please give me the fucking strength. She's not ready. Not emotionally, not physically, not mentally... She's drunk, and she's still hurt.
I grind my teeth, ashamed to admit that I'm slightly upset as I push the door open.
Keeping her facing me, I back her into the room, my eyes lock hard on hers, and I know without having to look at a mirror just how icy my gaze must look.
The source of my torment is actively throwing herself at me, and I'll be denying us both out of a sense of honor.
Is it maybe misplaced?
The moment I close the door, she flings herself into my chest. I grab her to me hard. Just as desperate as she is. Her leg lifts to wrap around my hip, and I grunt in surprise as she wraps herself around me in a tight hold.
I break the silence between us first. "Slow down, love," I say quietly, wanting to ease her urgency.
"No," she says breathlessly, pressing even harder. "No, I don't want to go slow." Her voice quivers. "I'm burning up for you."
My eyes narrow. "Whatever you're thinking, baby, just know our first time won't be fast."
She gasps, her eyes widening.
Taking a couple steps deeper into the room, I break, putting an arm under the fleshy curve of her ass, and haul her higher until her legs wrap around my waist; I feel her heels digging into my lower back.
My cock jerks with arousal so acute it might as well be pain.
Fuck, her core is so warm nestled against my abdomen, almost like she's not wearing panties.
Closing my eyes, I bite the inside of my cheek hard when I get a hint of her desire, and my mouth waters.
"Kiss me. Now," I plead, not even ashamed for her to know how badly I want her mouth on me. So desperate for a taste of her that I'm currently cemented to the floor in the middle of the little foyer, unable to move.
Sarah makes this small sound in her throat before slanting her lips onto mine and wrapping her arms around my neck, one hand sinking into my hair.
At the feel of her lips rubbing over mine, I groan, needing to go deeper.
To truly taste her. Feeling her nails scratching my scalp gently, I tilt my own head, licking into her mouth and searching deeper.
Goddammit, her flavor is amazing.
"You're heaven," I whisper, my tongue slicking along hers.
Though there's so much passion, I can sense her hesitancy and naivety in the way she kisses.
My cock throbs so painfully that I slide my hands under her dress and into her panties, palming her ass.
I give her a grind, trying to find a little relief.
At her sharp moan, I pull back enough to speak. "Give me your tongue when I kiss you."
Her eyes dilate at the rough command, but her lashes lower, and her cheeks blush a deep crimson.
Leaning forward, I lick the plump flesh of her bottom lip. My body heats with an uncomfortable layer of perspiration when I feel her entire body shiver. I seal my mouth over hers and part her lips firmly, touching the tip of my tongue to hers, then waiting patiently.
But she doesn't make me wait for long; her tongue touches mine back, and I begin to rock us as I suck her into my mouth.
Tilting my head, I groan miserably as Sarah overtakes my senses.
Feeling her soft lips moving against mine gently, my mind races as something substantial shifts inside me, something crucial that I know has never been touched or moved before.
The closest I think I've ever felt to this was when Tyler was born.
"Make love to me," Sarah mumbles against my lips.
Instead of shying away at this point like I normally do when a woman asks me to fuck, my need becomes even deeper.
More enhanced. Making my entire body flush hot with an unbearably intense arousal.
Before I can answer, she moves fast, putting a hand to her side and struggling to unzip her dress. "Alex, help me."
She tugs even more erratically, but the zipper isn't going down.
Honestly, I don't even care right at this moment because she tastes too good to stop.
Lost in the bliss of her mouth, I feel the hair on the back of my neck and arms stand up as I give myself permission to lose myself in the intimacy of this moment.
I pull my hand from her ass to cradle the side of her jaw as I kiss her back roughly.
It's messy. Hot. Sensual and forbidden all at once.
Our lips smack together, and precome drips off the tip of my dick at the next roll of her hips into me, and God, there's nothing inside me that wants her to stop.
But we need to before we cross a line we can't come back from.
She's not ready, but our bodies don't understand. Electricity sizzles between us so strong it's a wonder we're not catching on fire.
I pull away reluctantly and note that she's still trying to jerk the zipper of her dress down.
A little line between her brows appears with her frustration, and her cheeks tint red the more she struggles.
Wanting to calm her, my hand presses against hers, stilling her movements as I work to look into her eyes.
She meets them with a wide-eyed, slightly confused look.
"Sarah," I say in a soft tone. "If you show me your breasts, I won’t be able to stop, sweetness."
I bite the inside of my cheek hard, suddenly wishing I had something to sink my hand into because I can't believe I'm actually saying this. Apparently, neither can she.
Sarah recoils her head slightly, clearly offended. "Wait, what...what do you mean?" she says in a small voice.
My eyes drink her in greedily. Her hair is slightly mussed, and the tip of her nose and cheeks are red; her eyes are wide and shiny with the pupils blown wide, dilated with desire.
And eagerness. My gaze roams lower, seeing her breasts slightly heaving as she works to catch her breath.
My eyes flit back to hers, seeing hurt begin to override her arousal, and it makes my chest tighten in pain because the last thing I want to do is hurt her.
I have to explain.
Needing her to understand, I wet my lips, speaking hastily, "I can't, Sarah. You're not ready, baby. You're drunk. You still have some bruising on your back... it wouldn't be right. I can't make love to you right now, not like this."
My heart cracks in half as Sarah's bottom lip trembles. "You don't want me..." she whispers with a finality that lets me know she really thinks I don't. Her eyes lower to my chest before welling with tears, and I see a sadness inside her that makes my heart pound uncomfortably.
I make a rough sound. "Look at me, now," I give her a little shake and wait until her eyes return to mine. "How can you fucking say that to me? You know damn well how badly I want you. I've been wanting you, Sarah."
She sniffs, and her eyes widen as she furrows her brows. "Then why won't you make me feel good? I just want you to—"
I squeeze my eyes shut for a second, wishing I was a different person. Wishing just for once I could let myself sink into her lush body without a care in the world about the repercussions. My eyes snap open.
"Because once I get in I am not leaving.
That's why," I pin her with a hard stare, seeing her eyes widen even further.
"And you are not ready for everything that comes along with an intimate sexual connection.
I'm not doing that to your psyche; you're too fragile right now.
" My voice is about as hard as my eyes, yet I don't attempt to soften my approach.
She needs to understand. "You mean way too much to me for me to fuck you right now. "
"Please, please, Alex, please," she pleads.
A tear travels down her cheek and drips onto the naked upper swell of her breast. To make matters worse for me, she lets out a tiny sob, followed by another.
I stand still for a moment, regarding her.
My heart tugs painfully, and tears well in my own eyes at the sight of her vulnerability and the feeling of mine, because I want her just as badly, if not more.
I stay silent as I look unwavering into her eyes; they're shiny, full of desire and fear. I know without looking that she sees something similar in my gaze. Slowly, I bend, burying my nose in the crook of her neck where I just breathe her in.
The woman I'm in love with.
"Make love to me," Sarah says again. "I know…I know you want to. I want to….The bed's right there!"
She's unrelenting.