Chapter 19
19
IVY
The kiss started slow. Ivy wasn’t sure what she wanted. She’d known this man for less than a week, but somehow he’d rooted himself inside her and the feelings that were growing felt very strong, despite them being foolish and irresponsible. Ross must have dropped the mistletoe sprig, because she felt him gently press his gloved hands to the edges of her cheeks so he could tilt her chin upwards, then he bent lower so the kiss could deepen.
Ivy had never felt like this. She’d had boyfriends over the years – there had been one at the garden centre who she’d dated for over six months. But much like a sweet pea in mid-summer, the feelings had bloomed hot and fast, only to wither and die almost as rapidly. There’d been no animosity and no regrets – just indifference.
But her feelings for Ross already went far deeper and she wasn’t sure what to do with them. The kiss grew hotter and her heart hammered as her blood pumped so fast Ivy felt light-headed. Her knees began to go and she wrapped her arms around Ross’s neck and pressed their bodies closer, feeling the evidence of his arousal. Wishing suddenly that they weren’t in the woods just a few hundred metres from Grizzle’s house.
She broke off the kiss and stared into Ross’s face. Saw confusion slide across his eyes before he pulled back too.
‘Okay,’ he murmured as if returning to sanity. ‘That mistletoe should come with a warning.’ He cleared his throat.
Ivy found herself smiling. ‘I’ll let Bonnibell and Connell know.’ She swallowed before taking in their surroundings. ‘We’ve been a while. I suppose?—’
‘Aye – we should get the trees.’ He didn’t sound particularly happy about it.
Ivy drew in a breath, still trying to get her wayward hormones to still. ‘If we don’t, Grizzle might come looking for us.’ Was she trying to convince herself or Ross?
‘Or worse, he’ll send Bowser.’ Ross pulled a face before he bent to pick up the mistletoe he’d let fall to the ground. ‘Shall we revisit this later?’ he asked, looking hopeful.
Ivy nodded. It might be a bad idea, but she knew she wasn’t going to be able to refuse. Was this how her parents had felt when they’d met? Had the connection between them been just as compelling? It was madness to let herself fall further into it, but even as Ross went to pick up the axe, Ivy knew she wasn’t strong enough to walk away.
The balsam fir Ivy had selected for Ross’s house was perfect. She wiped the snow from her hair and jumper as he finished setting it up to the right of the fireplace.
‘I’ve never bothered putting a tree in this house before. There never seemed much point because it was only me and the boys,’ Ross admitted as he shifted so he could light the fire.
‘Have you got any decorations?’ Ivy asked, wishing she’d thought about it earlier. Then again, her brain had been occupied since they’d left the forest with the two trees. Even decorating Grizzle’s house hadn’t stopped her mind from mulling over and over what had happened. As if it were trying to settle on an excuse for why their kiss had been so powerful so it could dismiss it. But Ivy knew if she pressed her fingers to her lips they’d still be tingling and wishing for a repeat.
‘Aye,’ Ross said as the fire began to crackle and glow. ‘Bonnibell’s been giving me baubles, pom-poms and bunting these past five years in the hope that I’d use them. She told me as an employee of Christmas Resort it was in my job description to decorate.’ He chuckled. ‘I haven’t – but I know where it all is.’ He paced into the utility room and returned carrying a large box and placed it on the floor beside the tree. ‘Do you want to get started and I’ll make us both a hot drink?’
Ivy nodded, then knelt and began to shuffle through the decorations as Snowball wandered across the room to help. She placed some tinsel to one side on the floor as she dug in the box for something to put on the top of the tree. The wild boar grabbed the sparkly string between his teeth and went running up to Moose to show it off. ‘Careful with that,’ she said as she began to rise.
‘It’s okay, he’ll be fine,’ Ross soothed, from the kitchen. ‘He’ll lose interest and you’ll get it back. If you go after him, he’ll decide it’s a game.’
Ivy nodded, then set to work hanging some of the sparkly baubles and bunting. There was a large Ferocactus sitting on the mantlepiece and on a whim she added a sparkly red bow to the top. By the time Ross brought the drinks over and placed them on the mantlepiece, Ivy was halfway through the box. ‘You could probably do with a few more decorations,’ she said as she stood aside so he could see her progress.
‘I’m sure Bonnibell can help with that.’ Ross shoved his hands into his pockets as he perused the room. ‘Is that something your da used to do at the garden centre?’ he asked, pointing to the glittering succulent, looking amused.
‘Not exactly,’ Ivy said shyly. ‘He brought me a couple of cacti when I was a kid and I take them with me everywhere. I usually decorate them at Christmas – it feels wrong to leave them out.’ She flushed. ‘They’re like part of the family – I even named them Prickles and Needles,’ she added, feeling her cheeks burn hotter when he gazed at her with an unreadable expression.
‘That’s…’
‘Weird?’ Ivy asked, suddenly wishing she hadn’t told him.
‘I was going to say charming,’ he said softly, fixing her with his whisky-coloured eyes. She watched a myriad of emotions flicker across his face until they settled into something Ivy could only describe as attraction. Ross cleared his throat. ‘I’ve still got the mistletoe. Where should we hang it?’ He pointed to the sprig he’d dropped on the sofa when they’d first arrived without moving his gaze from her face.
Ivy’s whole body heated as Ross shifted closer.
She’d known this was going to happen – they’d agreed on it – and suddenly Ivy didn’t really care whether it was a good idea. She tipped her chin and Ross began to lean in – that’s when she heard a loud crash and they both spun around.
‘Dammit, Snowball!’ Ross yelled as he charged across the room to check on his pet who was now tangled in the tinsel underneath a small oak table lying on its side. The string had hooked itself around the base of the table and Ross unwound it, releasing the wild boar from its grasp.
‘Is he okay?’ Ivy asked, breathlessly. ‘I’m so sorry, this is all my fault.’
‘It’s not – and he’s fine, just a little surprised,’ Ross soothed as Snowball leapt up and trotted over to Moose. Ross repositioned the table and then made a distressed sound as he spotted the three picture frames scattered on the floor. Glass was splattered beside one of them, and he carefully gathered it up, looking unsettled.
‘Let me find something to clear that up,’ Ivy offered, replacing the two intact pictures on the table. When she returned from the utility room with a dustpan and brush, Ross was still staring at the photo in the broken frame. ‘Are you okay?’ she asked gently, kneeling and quickly dealing with the glass.
‘I’m fine.’ He put the frame onto the sofa and took the dustpan from Ivy, heading for the bin. When he returned, he picked up the photo again and took it out of the frame. From where Ivy was standing, she could see the picture was of Simon. ‘I remember our conversation in the tent,’ Ross said, still staring at it. ‘It made me think about how it might feel if one day I didn’t get the chance to make up with my family. If it was ever too late.’
Ivy waited.
‘I suppose we never really know what’s going to happen, do we? Like glass. We’re all so fragile. Of anyone, I should know that.’ He swallowed. ‘I’m not sure why I forgot. I think…’ He hesitated. ‘I mean I know I need to speak to Miriam, but I want to talk to Simon first. We were close once.’ He turned and stared at her. ‘I need to know why he’s decided to walk away from being Laird.’ He gazed at the photo he was still clutching. ‘I may not have seen my brother for a long time, but I remember it’s all he ever wanted. I have to ask him what happened.’ He frowned. ‘If he’s unhappy maybe I can help. But…’ He looked anxious.
‘What?’
Ross’s gaze was suddenly vulnerable. ‘I’m terrified. What if Simon doesn’t want to know me?’
Ivy let out a long breath. ‘He might not,’ she admitted. ‘But what if he’s been waiting for you to get in touch? He might feel the same as you.’ She held her breath as Ross considered that.
His face cleared. ‘I don’t even have his number,’ he said, guiltily. ‘How awful is that? I walked away and never once considered my brother. I was so sure he felt the same as Miriam and didn’t want to know, that I ignored his calls.’ He squeezed his eyes shut for an instant before looking at her bleakly. ‘I decided a clean break would be best. But I think that’s just because it was what I needed.’
‘So make it right,’ she said softly. ‘I’ve got his number in my mobile if you want to call him now? I can go for a walk with Moose and Snowball and give you some privacy.’
Ross gave her a half smile. ‘If I let you outside on your own, you might never come back. You’ll be trying to remember the Latin names for all the trees and seeing what plants you can spot in the woods. I’m not sure I want to risk it.’ His voice was affectionate. ‘I’d like you to stay in the house while I call, if that’s okay? That way if things don’t go the way I want, I’ve got a shoulder to cry on. Or at least someone to share a bottle of single malt.’
Ivy nodded and pulled out her phone, suddenly feeling sick. Would Simon reject Ross? If he did, Ivy knew she’d leave Christmas Resort today and tell Miriam her grandson wasn’t interested in getting in touch.
Which would also mean any chance of their relationship developing further would be over before it had begun.
‘Did you speak to Simon?’ Ivy asked eagerly, her stomach churning as Ross headed down the stairs clutching her mobile.
‘Yes,’ Ross croaked as he strode to where she was waiting on the sofa.
‘And?’ Ivy asked, searching Ross’s face, suddenly afraid when he handed her back the phone. She hadn’t come to Christmas Resort to hurt him – did this mean she was going to have to leave?
Ross smiled suddenly. ‘It was great. He sounds just the same.’ He slumped onto the sofa and Ivy relaxed too, then he shut his eyes and hissed out air. ‘I was half-expecting him to hang up. But…’ He opened his eyes and gazed at her. ‘He was pleased to hear from me, once he got over the shock of it not being you on the phone. Do you want some whisky?’ he asked and stood before Ivy could respond.
‘Did he say why he left the castle?’ Ivy asked as Ross padded across the kitchen and poured them both a glass. He looked relaxed, the tension in his body gone.
‘No.’ Ross shook his head. ‘He’s driving to the resort to meet with me tomorrow. He said it’s been too long for our first real conversation not to be face-to-face.’ He swallowed. ‘I thought I’d ask Bonnibell if we can meet in the lodge. Neutral territory – also, her mince pies might bribe him into a good mood.’ He gave her a shy smile as he handed her a glass of whisky and took a sip of his own. ‘Dammit.’ He pulled a face. ‘I promised Grizzle I’d pick up his eBay packages from the post office tomorrow. He’s ordered more glasses.’
‘That’s okay,’ Ivy said. ‘I can do it.’
‘Thank you. I don’t want to let him down.’ Ross relaxed and sipped some of his drink. ‘I guess you can tell I’m nervous. That’s a little embarrassing to admit.’
Ivy squeezed his arm. ‘I’d be surprised if you weren’t. You’ve been hurt.’ She left her hand where it was and sipped from her glass. The amber liquid glided down her throat. ‘I hope he’ll have answers for you.’ She gave him a half-smile. ‘I hope they’re the right ones – the ones you deserve.’
‘What do I deserve?’ Ross asked, placing his hand over Ivy’s and setting off a wave of goosebumps that flared downwards to her toes.
‘I don’t know.’ Ivy shifted and sipped from her glass, suddenly feeling nervous. She knew where this was leading and knew she wanted it to happen. But she also knew it was going to mean a lot. At least to her. ‘To be happy, to have your family back, and…’ To find love . The words popped into Ivy’s mind and she flushed.
‘And?’ Ross asked, gazing at her. When she didn’t respond he took the glass from her hand and put it on the coffee table along with his.
‘I don’t know.’ Ivy’s heart hammered. She looked around the room searching for something to say that wouldn’t embarrass her. ‘Christmas trees,’ she squeaked. ‘You deserve those, baubles too, mince pies and…’ She was babbling now. ‘And, um?—’
‘Mistletoe?’ Ross interrupted, his voice husky. ‘Do I deserve that too?’
‘Yes,’ Ivy whispered, meeting his eyes. ‘And kisses,’ she added, breathlessly. Because she needed Ross to kiss her now…