Chapter 19 #2
“They argued about it and…Lucifer left.” He paused, his gaze suddenly seeming far away.
“He just…left. We had never seen such a thing before, hadn't known it was possible.” He tipped his head back to look at the sky, as if he was seeing it all again.
“The creator was furious but…we did not know he would be so cruel.
Several of us spoke up, said it wasn't right to cast an angel from Heaven, to let him leave. We told him to go get him…” He paused.
“And he does not like to be ordered around.”
The pause was longer this time.
“So…” Cullen murmured hesitantly. “You spoke up and…he cast you out?”
“Something to that effect.” He waved a dismissive hand.
Cullen sensed it was a more delicate issue than he was letting on.
“So we fell. The four of us that had spoken up. Seven days and seven nights, as the story says. We were awake, aware for all of it. I felt and tasted when the divine air of Heaven vanished around me, when it was replaced with nothingness. Dark, empty space that soon gave way to the filthy, impure air of the human’s planet.
I fell…and when I awoke I was broken. So…
broken.” His body twitched as if remembering phantom pain.
“I was very close to Lucifer–physically, I mean. It turned out that, though he had left of his own free will, our creator struck him down as he fell from the heavens. I could see him not far off. Broken and bloody, little more than a pile of bones and feathers and blood. I watched him put himself together again, a strange, dark magic surrounding him as his body laced itself into one piece. I began to copy the example almost on instinct.” He inhaled sharply.
“It took days to heal. Almost as long as it took us to fall.”
Cullen remained silent, his lips pressed into a tight line.
He had not known any of this. Even the stuff about the angels falling…
well, it was only rumors, really. Passed down by the angels themselves years ago.
He had not known it had been for such a ridiculous reason, that they had simply stood up for their fallen brother…
“I was the third, after Lucifer, to regain my body. It was…a difficult process. Something we had to do on our own. And even after we did, our bodies were weak and strange. We no longer had the strength of Heaven. But Lucifer…his rage remained. And he shared it with us. To make us strong again. And when he did…” He paused.
“That’s when Heaven’s light turned to shadows in our veins.
That is when we turned into demons full of hate and fury, our kindness turned to a death aura that we had no wish to push away.
So we accepted it and we became…” He smiled, looking proud now.
“We became the cruel things that we are now.”
“You look like you enjoy it.” Cullen murmured. “Being…this.”
His eyes slid back to his face. “I wouldn’t trade it for the world.”
A loaded silence settled over them. Cullen wasn’t sure how to break it.
“Though…” Leviathan shifted a bit, crossing his arms thoughtfully. “There was a time when a few of my brothers…they regretted. Leaving. Standing up for Lucifer.” He shook his head. “Even Lucifer himself began to doubt his choices at one point, began to consider begging for access to Heaven again…”
Cullen waited, sensing a “but”.
“That was when we met another god.” He continued quietly.
“An older one. A much crueler one than our own. When he asked us how we had been created and we told him…well…he laughed. Laughed because our creator had the nerve to say he was the one and only. The only god in a universe full of gods…” His face pinched.
“That was when we realized we’d been lied to.
That there was so much more and our creator only wanted to control us.
” He scoffed. “A god controlling other gods.” He twisted and spit over the side of the balcony.
“Pathetic. We have not fallen prey to our doubts again since then. And, though I don’t get along with my brothers very well or deal with them often, I hope they never become so foolish again.
“We found different dimensions and we made them our own. We made our own slaves and temples and we are now gods as well, as we should have been all along. As we were the moment we were created.
“Lucifer…he is our leader, but he does not control us. Not the same way. We only look to him sometimes, every few centuries or so, but he is usually…busy.” He frowned. “It is complicated.”
“Sounds like it.” Cullen murmured, looking over the edge of the balcony again. “I’m…sorry you were treated like that.”
Leviathan’s head snapped up, but Cullen kept his eyes on the darkness below. Stupid, maybe, to be so kind to him. But…maybe he just didn’t want to lose his humanity like Leviathan had lost his divinity. It seemed…important to keep the basics. Even if it was dangerous.
To his surprise, Leviathan’s hand came down on top of his on the railing, making him twitch. “It’s not your fault.” He murmured.
“I know.” He mumbled. “But I…I’m still sorry you had to go through all that.
And I’m glad you told me.” His hand twitched again as Leviathan’s fingers brushed a little higher.
He felt his thumb press down on his pulse point and knew he could feel the racing beat of his heart now.
He did not pull away. Couldn’t bring himself to, when he was finally getting some type of contact from another person that wasn’t forced.
“A small price to pay for freedom.” Leviathan murmured. His thumb brushed a little higher and Cullen gasped quietly.
Leviathan’s eyes flickered up to his face and Cullen realized that they were very close. Much closer than before. Leviathan had not been the one to move.
Tension stretched between them. It took him too long to pull his hand away and scratch at the back of his neck, a fake laugh popping from his mouth as he stepped back and gazed down into the darkness again.
“Cullen–”
“I-I want to…” His face was burning. “We should…I want to go back to my room.”
“Hang on just a–”
Panic bit into him, making him back away. “I-I’m glad we talked about this. That you told me. But I…”
Maybe a joke would snap the fragile tension that had grown between them.
“This is awfully high.” He choked out, leaning a little over the edge despite his fears.
His hands trembled from a mix of fear and…
something else. “I’m shocked you brought me out here.
Since I’m suicidal and stuff.” Another awkward laugh popped from him as he stood straight and began to back away again.
He jumped when his back hit the railing, his hands fumbling behind him for something to hold onto, to ground him.
“Hell, I could probably just jump right–”
He broke off with a strangled gasp as Leviathan shot forward and wrapped his hands around his throat, squeezing tight.
Cullen clawed at his hands, trying to drag in a breath as Leviathan slammed him against the stone railing.
Part of it chipped off as Leviathan pushed him against it, forcing him to lean backwards over the edge.
Tears sprang to Cullen's eyes as he grabbed at Leviathan’s wrists, panic making him clutch him closer.
He let out a strangled gasp as Leviathan squeezed tighter, his eyes blazing with rage.
Cullen opened his mouth, trying to choke out a plea to stop, but Leviathan only pushed him further over the edge, his grip on his throat the only thing keeping him from dropping to his death.
Several agonizing seconds passed before Leviathan finally drew him closer and brought his mouth down on his, kissing him hard.
And Cullen couldn't help it; he kissed him back, groaning into his mouth as the darkness and the desire swept over him, leaving him feeling dizzy. Leviathan made a soft sound of surprise, parting his lips and sweeping inside with his tongue. Cullen grappled at his shirt, pulling himself closer to him and away from the railing. Their bodies pressed together; he felt Leviathan’s erection rub hard against his, and then he broke away with a gasp as Leviathan’s fingers tightened even more, cutting off his air completely.
Just as his vision started to darken, Leviathan pulled him up and threw him back towards the balcony doors.
Cullen collapsed to the ground, coughing and rubbing at his throat. Leviathan stood nearby, watching him with furious eyes, rage pouring off him in dangerous waves.
"What the fuck?" Cullen demanded, coughing again. "What's your problem?"
"You must not want to die too badly." He snapped. "Since you didn't want to fall and you stopped me from choking you. So shut the fuck up about it. I don't want to hear it again."
"You're such a psychopath!" Cullen screamed. "Who the hell does something like that?!"
Leviathan ignored him, his eyes narrowing. "You kissed me back." He breathed.
Cullen blushed, startled by the shift. "No, I…
that was…" He scrambled inside his head for answers, for a deterrent for the look Leviathan was giving him.
He sucked in a breath, fighting the darkness that was still clouding his mind.
"Like you said, I didn't want to fall. So I did what I had to do to stay alive.
I kissed you back so you wouldn't throw me over.
I wasn't kissing you back. I was just trying not to die. "
He saw the rage bloom in Leviathan’s face, saw his hands curl into fists, and felt the killing aura that began to roll off of him in deadly waves.
He scrambled back, terror making him unable to get to his feet, to run–but Leviathan only raised a hand, drawing a heavy swirl of dark shadows in front of him until he’d made another portal.
He moved faster than Cullen could see, grabbing him by the arm and hauling him up.
Cullen flinched away from him, but his grip only tightened on his arm.
He pulled him into the darkness, and they appeared in Cullen’s bedroom seconds later.
Leviathan shoved him away without a word and when Cullen spun to face him again, he was gone.
Leviathan let the shadows pull him along this time, let them take their time while they found him a place where he could take out the rage without it being noticed, without it somehow getting back to Cullen that he’d done something so violent in his anger.
A stupid thing to worry about, really. He should have just went right back to the Academy and shredded that brat Walker and brought Cullen back his head–
He heard the sounds of battle and stepped out of his shadows, blinking in surprise at the bright light that filled his gaze.
Sunlight, burning down on him and making the sand under his feet scorching hot.
He grimaced and looked to the side as several shouts of confusion sprang up, cutting off the rapid gunshots that had been deafening moments before.
He turned again, seeing the enemies these men had been fighting, sensing their shock and fear as well. He waited, smirking when they screamed at him in two different languages to get off the battlefield. And then he brought his hands together and squeezed.
A pulse of energy shot off of him and both sides of this small scuffle exploded in screams and wet explosions as their bodies popped like water balloons.
Leviathan chuckled softly as they fell silent, as blood misted in the air.
He shivered at the scent of it, darkness licking at the edges of his mind.
It had been far too long since he’d eaten raw…
He shook the thought away, telling himself it was not a human heart he wanted…needed right now. He needed…
“Fuck this.” He hissed, drawing up his shadows again. They carried him back to his dimension, taking their time again before they dropped him out of their cold breeze, setting him down just in front of the doors of his palace. He paused there, listening closely.
Cullen had gone to bed, but he was restless, his heartbeat too quick and his body constantly shifting. He made a soft sound that Leviathan knew meant he was somewhere in between sleep and consciousness, and Leviathan found himself tensing at the sound.
He looked up at the balcony he knew was Cullen’s–and smiled.
“Time’s up, brat.”