45. Chapter Forty-Five
Alex carries me across the threshold into the pack house.
I stay curled against his chest, my face pressed into the soft fabric of his shirt, while Noodle purrs insistently in my arms. The fever makes everything feel hazy and too bright at the edges, like the world has gone soft and glowing around me.
The moment we step inside, their scents wash over me all at once. Golden amber and warm vanilla. Rain on stone and crisp paper. Jamie and Adrian are already waiting just inside the entryway. The familiar combination pulls a faint whine from my throat before I can stop it.
Noodle suddenly stirs. In one fluid motion she jumps out of my arms and skitters down the hallway, leaving me without her small comforting body. I whine again at the sudden loss, the sound small and needy.
Adrian moves forward immediately. He takes me gently from Alex’s arms and pulls me close against his chest. His scent wraps around me like cool mist after rain, grounding and safe. I sigh and melt into him, my fingers curling into the fabric of his sweater.
The rest of the pack closes in around us.
Chase steps behind me, his large presence solid and wanted.
Jamie moves to my side, his hand brushing lightly down my arm.
Alex stays close at my other side, his dark cedarwood scent unwavering.
Together they create a protective circle of warmth and familiar scents that sinks deep into my fevered skin.
Adrian’s arms hold me close, one hand stroking slow circles along my back. He leans down and presses a soft kiss to the top of my hair, his lips cool against my fever flushed skin.
“I spoke with Dr. Okonkwo right after Alex called,” he murmurs, voice close. “I explained that you had a medical emergency and wouldn’t be able to go on the rainforest trip.”
I feel the words settle over me, my chest exploding with pain at the realization that it’s done. I won’t be going.
The fever makes everything hazy, but I still hear the care in his tone, the way he chose his words so carefully for me.
Adrian continues gently. “She was very understanding. She said they will figure out a way for you to join an expedition later this year. The opportunity isn’t gone, Elodie. Just delayed.”
I blink up at him through the haze, my voice small and hopeful. “Really?”
He nods, his green eyes tender. “Really. We’ve looked after everything. The timing was out of our control, but we love you. We’ll make sure you are supported now and after your heat.”
Relief washes through my chest, loosening some of the tight knot that has lived there for days.
Later this year… I can still go on an expedition. I can still have the rainforest, the insects, the work that makes my heart feel full.
But right behind the relief comes a quieter grief. The trip I dreamed about, the one I earned on my own, slips away again. Tears prick at the corners of my eyes as the two feelings tangle together.
I press my face back into Adrian’s sweater and let the comfort of his scent keep me grounded while the fever and the emotions swirl inside me.
The pack stays close, their presence a promise that I don’t have to carry any of this alone.
Chase wraps his big arms around both me and Adrian, holding me from behind. His pine forest scent surrounds me completely, like stepping into thick woods after rain. The solid weight of him presses gently against my back, and I feel the measured beat of his heart through his chest.
He lowers his head until his voice rumbles close to my ear, rough with emotion. “I treated your future like something I needed to manage instead of protect. I was wrong. I am so sorry, Elodie.”
The apology sinks into me. I turn in their arms until I can face him properly.
Chase’s deep eyes are full of regret, his chocolate brown hair falling across his forehead, and the beautiful black tattoos on his arms flex as he holds us.
He looks like he is carrying the weight of every protective instinct he has ever felt.
Before I can answer, Alex’s calm, steady voice carries over us from where he stands close beside us.
“We all did. And the pack will not be making that mistake again. We can’t control anyone’s narrative, Elodie, I wish we could. But we can control our actions and behaviors.”
The words sit with me assuredly. This is exactly what I need to hear. The heavy knot that has lived in my chest for days begins to loosen, unraveling thread by thread.
They see me. They understand what they almost took from me, and they are choosing differently now.
Tears spill down my cheeks, hot and silent at first. I look for Jamie through the blur.
He steps forward without hesitation and easily scoops me up into his arms, holding me close against his chest. His golden amber and vanilla scent floods me with reassurance, bright and playful even now, wrapping around me like sunlight on a cold day.
I press my face into the curve of his neck and let the words come. “I forgive you,” I whisper. “All of you. I know you can’t be perfect or control everything, and I’m sorry for having expected you to be able to.”
My voice grows stronger as I finish, firm and sure. “I love you too. And I choose you. All of you.”
Their scents bloom around me in response, warm and relieved and full of love.
Dark cedar and heat warmed skin. Rain on stone and crisp paper.
Golden amber and vanilla. Pine forest and clean musk.
They press closer, surrounding me completely, and for the first time in days the ache in my chest eases into something certain.
I am home.