Chapter 17
All the blood in Gavin’s body rushed to his groin with such speed that it was a wonder he didn’t lose consciousness. Seeing Lainey standing before him, utterly naked, hair flowing about her shoulders and silk piled at her feet, was so surreal that his mind took a moment to catch up to reality. He stared at her, slack jawed, for so long that Lainey moved to cover herself.
“Don’t you dare,” Gavin growled.
Lainey froze. “I…I thought you might be judging and finding me lacking,” she said shyly. “I’m heavier on the bottom than on the top, and—”
“You are magnificent.”
She paused. “Oh.”
There was a moment of awkward silence, during which Gavin questioned if he was going to be able to live without ever seeing her like this again. At the moment, it seemed unlikely.
“Lainey, you are sure about this? It will change our relationship irrevocably.” She gave him a decisive nod. “Then come here.” She stepped out of her gown and came toward him. He took her hand. “Sit.” She did, and his hand went to the button on his trousers. “Your turn to judge,” he teased. He removed them and stood before her, allowing her to look her fill. Her eyes went wide as she took in the sight of him, curiosity written on her features. He felt every bit of the shyness she had experienced only a few moments ago.
“I believe I’ve seen a statue of you at the museum,” she finally said, giggling. She reached a hand toward his obviously enthusiastic member. “May I?”
“I am yours to explore.”
She gave him a tentative stroke with her fingertips. Gavin hissed through his teeth. Lainey glanced up with a worried expression.
“No. That felt good,” he said, answering her unspoken question.
She returned to her perusal. “So soft,” she whispered. “But…not. I’ve never felt anything quite like it. It’s…velvety, almost.” She closed her hand around him and he groaned, so she gave him an experimental stroke. He nearly spent himself right then.
So, he was completely unprepared for when she leaned forward and slowly licked the head of his cock. “God above, Lainey!”
“I’m sorry, was that wrong to do?”
“No! I mean…ladies don’t…I…are you sure you haven’t done this before?” he choked out, his voice cracking.
Lainey laughed. “I work with underprivileged women. They are much more willing to discuss such matters than society ladies are. I’ve never had the chance to put them into action before, though, so I don’t know if what I’m doing is right.”
“You’re doing fine,” he squeaked as she stroked him again. “There is no right or wrong. You learn with your partner what brings the greatest pleasure. For example…” He closed his hand over hers, forcing her fingers a little tighter around him. “Now try.” She did, and he saw stars.
“Tell me if this feels good.” She looked him straight in the eye, and with a mischievous glint in her own, took him in her mouth, closing her lips about him and stroking down his length with her hand.
“Oh, God.” Gavin’s knees nearly buckled. “Yes, that feels good.” He fisted his hands in her glorious hair. “So good,” he groaned. He enjoyed her ministrations for a minute, but then he had to interrupt her before he embarrassed himself. “Remind me to personally thank these women for their honesty.” He pushed her back on the bench. “Now it’s time to show you what I know.”
Lainey looked a little apprehensive, but she lay back against the cushions willingly. Gavin crawled up her body like a tiger stalking prey. She shivered and he grinned before he kissed her soundly. He covered her body with his and at last, they were skin to skin. She moaned aloud.
“I wasn’t expecting it to feel like this,” she admitted. “It’s wonderful.”
He nibbled on her neck, purposely sliding his body against hers, and she moaned again. “It’s divine,” he agreed. “But there is so much more.”
He came to his knees and kissed his way down her silken belly, making her giggle. Ah, so she was ticklish. He nipped her waist, eliciting another breathless laugh. He continued on his path.
“Gavin, what are you doing?”
“I want to taste you, like you did me.”
“You can do that?” She sounded incredulous.
Gavin couldn’t help himself, he laughed. “Quite easily, as a matter of fact.”
“But that seems so…naughty.”
“No more so than what you did to me…and I do so love to be naughty,” Gavin said, his voice gravelly. He gently encouraged her thighs apart. “May I?” he asked, echoing her earlier words.
“If…If you really want to.”
“Oh, I want to.” He dipped his head and kissed the crease of her thigh before flicking his tongue over her most sensitive flesh. She nearly arched off the bench.
“Do you like it?” He licked her again.
“Ermgh.”
Gavin’s shoulders shook with mirth. It wasn’t often that Lainey was speechless. She struggled up on her elbows to look at him. “That is…quite amazing.”
He grinned wolfishly and returned to the task at hand. Her head lolled back on her shoulders.
“Lainey, look at me,” he commanded.
“Oh, I couldn’t…” But she met his gaze as he gave her another stroke of his tongue, and Gavin thought he might explode with the sensualness of it. Her eyes were locked on his as he licked and sucked until she collapsed against the cushion, writhing with pleasure. Gavin tore his mouth from her, kissing his way along her thigh as he sat up.
“Oh no! Don’t stop, Gavin,” she pleaded.
He slipped his hand between her thighs, taking over the stroking with his thumb. Lainey gasped, and he knew she was close to reaching her climax. “I want to watch you come, Lainey. Let me see that passion I know you have inside you. Don’t be afraid to show me.”
He slid a finger inside of her, circling his thumb on her clit and increasing the pressure. Little incoherent noises came from Lainey as she clutched the edge of the cushion, her knuckles white. Gavin kept up his rhythm, sliding in another finger, watching the strain on her face build, until finally, she cried out, arching against his hand, her muscles convulsing tightly around him. Her breath froze in her lungs as waves of pleasure washed over her, until the tension faded and her limbs went limp. She opened her eyes and Gavin smiled at her.
“That was glorious to watch.”
“It wasn’t so bad on my end, either.”
Gavin chuckled and stretched his body over hers, settling between her legs, nuzzling her neck. Her arms went about him, trailing her fingers lightly across his back, and he couldn’t help but think how natural it was to have her here like this, naked beneath him, running her hands over him while he inhaled the scent of her. In fact, it scared Gavin to death.
Because the truth of the matter was, Lainey made him feel whole. Like he wasn’t a monster living inside a friendly facade, a ticking bomb. Bedding her would change their friendship forever, but then again, so would her marriage. Tonight, she was asking him for something he was all too willing to give…with the hope that he would be able to purge this desire for her from his system. He was in for a miserable existence otherwise.
“Lainey…” he whispered, brushing the hair back from her face, kissing her reverently. He kneaded a breast in his palm, moving against her but not entering her, until she was squirming with anticipation.
“Gavin, please. I cannot wait any longer.”
“Patience, my dear,” he said, taking himself in hand and stroking his head against her pearl. Lainey let out a guttural sound at this new sensation, and Gavin enjoyed watching her grow more and more aroused. She was so wet and ready for him, it was hard to hold back.
“Gavin,” she choked out, frustration coloring her voice.
He snickered. “Yes?”
“Gah.”
“I’m afraid I didn’t quite get that. What is it you want?”
“You.” She was panting with need now, and Gavin was fighting to maintain control.
“I’m right here.” He pressed against her, but not enough to breach her entrance.
“Gavin!” She grabbed at his arms, his shoulders, whatever was in reach. “You. Inside me. Now.”
“Open your eyes and look at me.” She did, and he slid into her wet heat.
“Oh! Oh, God. Gavin.”
“Is this what you want?” He pulled back and then thrust in a little farther. Her eyes drifted closed again, her lips parted.
“God, yes. Yes.”
There were no more words after that. Gavin gave her body time to adjust, then fully seated himself in her, groaning as he savored the feel of her around him. He began a steady rhythm, which she naturally picked up, whimpers of pleasure coming from both of them. He thought she might be close to a second orgasm, and he desperately wanted to feel her come around him. He was too close to his own release, so he interrupted his rhythm for a moment to sit on his knees. Lainey looked at him with desire clouded eyes.
“What are you doing?” she murmured.
“Put your leg on my shoulder.” She looked doubtful, but did as she was asked. He repositioned himself and entered her again with a slow, long stroke.
“Oh. Oh.”
Gavin couldn’t keep the satisfied smile from his face. He placed his thumb on her clit and began to stroke while he thrust in and out. Lainey’s body tightened almost instantly as this new assault of pleasure.
“Gavin,” she breathed.
He couldn’t decide which he liked better: watching the pleasure on her face or watching his cock drive in and out of her. He was rapidly losing control.
“Come on, Lainey,” he encouraged. “I want to feel you come around me. Ah, yes,” he rasped as she tightened around him. “Come for me, Lainey.” He thrust faster, and in moments she cried out, convulsing around him, drawing him close to his own precipice. A few seconds more, and he pulled out of her, stroking himself with a loud groan, spilling his seed on the ground. His heart hammered in his chest as he collapsed next to her, pulling her into his arms while they both recovered from their exertions. He pressed a kiss to her temple, unable to find words. They both gasped for air while they lay looking up at the stars.
As his breathing returned to normal, Gavin had to admit a few things to himself. First, it was incredibly stupid of him to think that bedding Lainey would quench this lust he’d been experiencing of late because, second, now that he had had her, all he could think about was having her again. And again. Third, watching her marry someone else was going to absolutely crush him.
Because whether he wanted to or not, he cared very deeply for her. Lainey had been “his” for most of his life, and he found he didn’t like the thought of sharing her with anyone else. When he thought of Devereaux or one of the others touching Lainey the way he just had, his vision blurred. He didn’t want any man’s hand on her but his.
And therein lay the other part of the problem. The jealousy that rose in him made him lose control, and Gavin must always remain in control. It was dangerous for him to give in to his anger; he was frightened of what may be unleashed. He couldn’t trust himself, and he would never subject Lainey to an unstable marriage or put her in an unsafe situation.
But now, lying here with her in his arms, listening to the crickets chirp around them, peace stole over him, a kind of restfulness he had never before felt in his life. He took these moments with her and wrapped them safely in his heart, just like the precious gifts that they were.
“You are very quiet,” Lainey observed softly.
“Woolgathering, I suppose.” He raised up on his elbow to look down at her. He stroked his knuckles down her cheek. “Are you all right?”
She took a breath to say something, then seemed to decide against it. She smiled. “I am well. Indeed, that was…” she trailed off, searching for the right words. When she could find none, she hesitantly asked, “Is it always like that?”
Gavin regarded her with seriousness. “No. In fact, I’ve never experienced anything so incredible in my life.”
“Truly?”
“Truly. But that is not to say it is not enjoyable at other times,” he added at the worried look on her face. “If one’s partner is willing to learn one’s needs and likes, it can be quite a bit of fun. There isn’t much point in being a selfish lover. Lovemaking is so much more satisfying when both parties are finding it equally enjoyable.”
Lainey gazed up at him, an inscrutable expression in her eyes. She reached out a hand and rested it over his heart, fanning her fingers out against his silky flesh. She stayed like that for a few heartbeats, staring at her hand.
“Gavin,” she whispered. “I-” She broke off suddenly, thinking better of whatever she had been about to say. She looked ruefully into his eyes. “I should probably get back to my room. It’s late.”
Lainey silently cursed herself. She’d been about to ruin the most perfect moment of her life by telling Gavin that she loved him, which undoubtedly would have sent him fleeing. But she could hardly keep the words from spilling from her lips. She’d thought she would get over him eventually, thought perhaps setting her cap for someone else would ease the ache in her chest, but she realized now that Gavin was always going to have her heart. She could share it, but a large piece of it would always belong to him.
She traced a finger over his skin, pressing her lips together. She wished she could stay here with him till the sun rose. “Thank you for tonight, Gavin,” she said softly.
He cupped her cheek, his eyes searching hers. She thought she detected regret in them, but didn’t want to examine that too closely. He leaned down to kiss her, moving his lips over hers tenderly, showing her what he couldn’t say. Finally, he raised his head.
“I’m sor—”
“Don’t.” Lainey sat up, reaching past Gavin’s hip for her discarded robe and dragging it over him. He looked positively delectable, lying there with his hair tousled, the robe just covering him at the waist, moonlight dusting his skin with a pearly glow. It was all she could do to not throw herself on him and beg him to make love to her again. “Let’s not tarnish this memory. It was a perfect night. You were…perfect.” She gave him a sad smile. “I really should go.”
She bent to retrieve her nightgown and slipped it over her head. She stood, reaching for her wrapper. She hesitated. “I’m afraid I’m going to need this.”
Gavin waggled his brows. “Go ahead and take it.”
Lainey grinned, swiping the fabric from him with a whispery swish. Her mouth went dry at the sight of him reclining, shamelessly naked, on the bench. She boldly swept her gaze up and down his sculpted body. “Hm.”
“Hm?” Gavin chuckled. “Who knew you were such a minx, Lainey Lockwood?”
She slid into her wrapper, tying the belt. “I daresay you did. Goodnight, Gavin.” She turned to go, but paused at the top of the stairs. “I’m glad you found me out here. I meant what I said. This was a beautiful night.”
She disappeared into the darkness.
Gavin watched her go, then rose to dress. A weight settled in his chest. As much as he had enjoyed their time together, he didn’t feel entirely good about what he’d done. It was obvious Lainey still carried a torch for him, and he was selfish to encourage her. And God forbid Aidan found out; he would tear Gavin limb from limb.
But truthfully, it was the fact that he realized he had come to care for Lainey so deeply that terrified him. There were only two days left of this cursed party, and then she would belong to someone else. He shoved his hands in his pockets and looked to the stars for an answer. They blinked back down at him, but offered no advice. He sighed heavily.
He simply needed to stay away from her. That would be the best solution. If he wasn’t around her, he wouldn’t be tempted by her, and she would be free to focus on the reason she was here in the first place. It would be breaking his promise of support, but it was the only option he could see. He would go mad otherwise.
He heaved a sigh and headed back to the house, his body still buzzing from holding Lainey in his arms.