16. Kai
The bright lights cover every angle of the large dirt track. Fans stand around the edges behind blockades and in the stands that sit higher up on the hill. The event staff wet down the dirt to prepare for the race. Cordelia is off to the side with her camera, waiting for us to take off. Coach gave us a pep talk, and everyone seemed to get over the events from earlier today. No one has asked me or Cordelia anything, which is surprising because the guys are nosy.
I take a deep breath and roll my bike to the gate. Then, all of us fist bump and nod to one another. This time, a bikini model announces the start of the race as she saunters back and forth across the track. My dark goggles are on, and I stare at Cordelia instead. She’s not looking at me, she’s looking out across the track. I do what coach said and take a good long look.
The model finishes her strut, and the countdown ticker lights up. I can’t hear much through my helmet. It drowns out all the braapy engines of the other bikes. The gate drops, and I take off down my line. Rollers hit us immediately, and I lift, slightly rolling with them like I’m in an ocean. A straightaway comes up and rolls to a large step up for a jump. I take it all in stride and rip around the track, watching my angles and holding my line so someone can’t cut me off. Checking my shoulder once, I spot Rafe at my back. Seething, I ignore him and push forward.
Almost thirty minutes later, I’m almost at the finish line. I see the checkered flag and know I’m on my last lap. I dig into the throttle and take the triple, one jump after the other, maintaining my speed to leave a gap between me and everyone else.
I take the curve to the finish line and plow through. Someone from another team comes in fast behind me, placing second, then Casey, Deacon, and Rafe come in after, sitting in third, fourth, and fifth place. We’ve now dropped in points. Dammit.
I drive over to our area and rip off my helmet. Throwing a glare at the guys, I start to open my mouth to ask what they were doing, but Reece storms up to us, and I snap my mouth shut.
“What the hell do you think this is? Are we in peewee now and riding around the track like it’s our first time?” he yells. “Deacon, you drove like a damn idiot because twenty-three cut you off. Either figure out how to use that anger to race better, or you can find yourself another team.” Deacon’s eyes widen, and his face gets red in anger. “Casey…” coach trails off and drops his hands. Then he takes his hat off his head and throws it on the ground. “Rafe, you are one of the most reckless riders I have ever seen, and that’s not a compliment. If I ever see you ride like that again, you are more likely to get yourself killed. I really don’t understand where your brains were at today. We’re lucky we got the places we did. Get everything packed up. I don’t want to be here another minute.”
“What about Kai, coach? You’re not going to chew him out?” Rafe snaps.
I keep a straight face and glance at Cordelia. She sticks her tongue out at me, and I wink at her.
“Kai is the only one that seems to know what he’s doing,” coach says, and Rafe scoffs. “You got something to say, Taylor?”
He swings his leg over his bike and stands up straight. “You are full of shit, and so is Kai—“
“Hey!” Cordelia yells. “Don’t—“
“Calm down, groupie. We all know you spread your legs for anyone now, so you—“
I don’t think. I act and slam my fist into his face. He lands on the ground, and I stand over him. “What did I say about how you speak to Cordelia?” I ask him. He wiggles his jaw back and forth and gets to his feet. Never hit a man while he’s down, so I wait for him to get up because I’m a gentleman, after all. He takes a second and swings at me. I duck easily and angle an uppercut into his jaw. He grunts in pain and stumbles back into Deacon, blinking quickly, trying to reorient himself.
Now he’s really mad and runs for me. I quickly cut out his feet and grab his wrist, pinning it behind his back while I hold his head in the dirt. I lean down to whisper in his ear because I don’t want Cordi to hear this. “Let me remind you. I said I would bury you and happily ride over your body. But because you disrespected my woman again, I’ll do you one better. I’ll bring you within an inch of your life over and over again, with various methods, until you are begging me to bury you. You’re fired. You’re off the team. If I ever see you again, I will choke you out with your own entrails. Do you understand me?“ I ask calmly. I lean forward while the side of his face is still in the dirt. The fear has set in now, sensing that I’m not bluffing, and he nods against the soil. “Good.” I release him and get to my feet. He launches to his, grabs his bike, and scurries away like the coward he is.
Deacon and Casey are silent. Reece stares me down with a blank expression, but his ticking jaw gives him up. “Alright, boys. Let’s get packed up. Looks like I need to make some phone calls and find a new team member,” he says as he walks away with his phone to his ear. The guys look at me one more time and shake their heads, walking their bikes away.
“Kai,” Cordi sighs. I hum and walk my bike towards my trailer. “That was a bit extreme. You didn’t need to do that. I can handle myself.” I flip my kickstand out and spin around to lean against my bike.
“Cordelia, if you are going to be my wife, not a single man will ever speak to you in that way. Period. If he does, I will put him in the ground. You will be a Coldwell, and I know you don’t know this yet, but it comes with certain things, one of those being respected. But honestly, you don’t need to be a Coldwell to demand it. You deserve to be respected even when people don’t like you, and I will not tolerate anything else.”
“Well, when you put it that way…” she says, pushing her sunglasses up the bridge of her nose. “So, does this mean you’re really going to let me know you?”
I shrug, and she rolls her eyes.
“You might run the other way,” I mutter.
“You can try, but I doubt it.”
I purse my lips. “I guess we will see then, won’t we? I’m going to get packed up since we’re heading out tonight.”
“Okay, I’m going to go change. I want to ride with you if that’s okay…we have some other things to talk about.”
“Yeah, that’s fine, but you know what?” I swallow thickly, and my heart beats roughly in my chest.
“What?” she asks with a hopeful voice.
“Get your stuff. You’re staying with me,” I tell her, leaving her no other option. She takes a step towards me and hesitates, so I decide for her and grip her chin, kissing her cheek.
“Okay, yeah. See you in a bit,” she whispers and walks to her trailer.
After I get my bikes in and tied down, I hop in the shower and change before hooking the truck to the trailer. Before I do, though, I call Mom to ask her for the ring I’m thinking of. I don’t know if she will want to part with it, but it’s worth the question. I didn’t want to ask in front of Cordi.
The phone rings, and she picks up on the second dial. “Hey, Mom.”
“Hi, sweetheart. How was the race?”
“It was okay…a team member was fired,” I tell her.
“Oh? And why was that?” she asks.
“Long story, but um, I was wondering if…well, there’s this ring I saw you wear once, it’s blue. I think it would be perfect, and if you were willing to…” Mom giggles, and I stop talking. “What?” I ask her.
“Oh, Kai. I’m so happy for you. I’ve only ever wanted my boys to be happy. I have to admit, I love seeing you flustered like this. You really love her, don’t you?” she asks.
“Yeah, Mom, I really do.” My chest tightens at the one piece of massive information I’m holding back. Cordi and I haven’t talked about how to tell people who the father is, let alone her dad or my mom. Or if she even wants to tell anyone that information. I need to know where her head is at now because she clearly didn’t want to talk earlier. “So, could I give that to her as her engagement ring?” I ask her.
“Of course, honey. I agree it would look perfect on her and much better use than decorating the safe. I’ll get it together for you.”
“Thank you, Mom. I’d like to see you.”
She hums. “I would too, sweetheart. I’m planning to visit you soon. Where’s your next stop?”
“We’re headed off to Florida tonight, actually,” I tell her.
“Okay, well, have a good trip. Stay safe. Make sure you drop your location,” she says.
“Yeah, I will. I love you. Talk soon.”
“I love you, too.” There’s a soft knock at the door, and I know who it is. I can sense her. Even when we were just friends, her presence has always been unmistakable to me. “Come in, gem,” I call from the couch.
The door opens, and she peeks her head in. “Oh, hi. I was wondering if you were ready to go?” She’s wearing bike shorts that aren’t actually bike shorts and an oversized t-shirt. I smile at her outfit because she has never had one sense of style. A few years ago, she was in dresses all the time, and now she’s in this athletic clothes phase. “What?”
I shake my head, smiling. “Oh, nothing, just looking at the outfit of the evening.”
She looks down and messes with her shirt. “What? It’s comfortable.”
I smile. “I like it. It makes me wonder what’s under the big t-shirt, though.” I stand to make sure the cabinets are locked into place, and the bump outs are pulled in before hooking the trailer and grabbing her stuff. She’s still standing on the bottom step, unmoving. “What?”
“You…you’ve never said things like that to me.” Her cheeks turn rosy, and she maintains eye contact.
“Come in here and shut the door,” I command. She does as told and stands in the little entry. I grab her wrist and tug her towards me, then back her up to the small bar countertop that juts out from the cabinets. She gasps and holds onto my shoulders as I lift her onto the countertop, pushing my hips between her legs. Her eyes widen in shock. Then I grab her mouth like it belongs to me because I belong to her. She kisses me back, and it’s like that night in the hot tub. I wanted to do this and so much more. Her fingers dig into my shoulders, and I wish I could feel her nails deeper in my skin.
I moan into her mouth as our tongues duel and explore. She tastes like my absolution for all the bad things I’ve done and will do for the sake of my family. My arms circle her waist, and I pull her as close as she can get to me.
Her whimper sparks a hunger in me as our teeth clash while I inhale her until my lungs beg for air. She rips her face away, and her chest heaves against mine. I lean into her neck, trailing wet kisses over her skin that isn’t covered by her clothes. She tilts her head, giving me more access. I barely notice her ankles crossed at my lower back, pulling me closer to her center.
“I’ve dreamed about this, made up things in my mind of how this would feel, and it doesn’t even hold a candle,” she says, out of breath.
I kiss her jaw and lift my eyes to hers. “You thought about us like this?” I ask her.
She bites her lower lip and nods. “You haven’t?” she asks. Her eyes grip me, and I nod.
“More than I’d like to admit.”
“Why?” she asks.
“I had no business thinking about my coach’s daughter that way. I knew I couldn’t have you, and he wasn’t okay with it, and he still isn’t.” She winces and drags her hands from my shoulders to my neck.
“It’s a good thing I’m not thirteen or boy crazy anymore then, isn’t it?” she says and drags her lips across mine.
“We need to go, gem,” I whisper against them.
“You started this, daredevil,” she murmurs against my lips.
“I want to finish it, but we have a two-day drive to North Florida,” I tell her. I lean away from her lips before I carry her the ten steps to my bed and forget every other thought about our next competition or the freestyle competition in Miami.
“Fine, let’s get going,” she sighs. I drop my arms from around her and slide my hands over her ribs to her plush hips and thighs, squeezing them before I let go.
I help her off the counter and finish getting everything locked down so that if I turn, cups and plates or the food in the fridge don’t come flying out. I start the truck and get the AC pumping so she’s not sitting in the heat for long. She stands off to the side while I walk back and forth, putting her things in the trailer, already breaking a sweat even though it’s about midnight. “Go ahead and get in, gem,” I tell her. She grabs her bag and hauls herself into the truck.
Sometimes, it’s easier to drive at night with little to no traffic. That, and I know Reece wants to get out of here. Not one of our finest moments as a team. Reece is already hooked up by the time I drop the gooseneck. He stops and rolls down the window. “I’ll see you in Dallas,” he calls out. I nod, and he stays there for a minute. I hop down from the bed of the truck and walk up to the window, sensing he doesn’t want to yell whatever he’s about to say.
“Thank you, Kai. He’s gone for good. I told the team owner, and he was okay with the decision. Our new teammate will meet us in Miami.”
“It’s going to kill our score,” I say.
He sighs and rubs his chin. “Then we better place top three and hope we can hold on until freestyle.”
“You got it, coach.”
“Alright, I’m going to head out. Catch up with me.”
I nod and return to my truck to do one more walk around the trailer before hopping into the drivers seat.
“You still have this?” Cordelia says, holding up the rabbit’s foot she gave me when we were teenagers. I leave it at the center console right below the radio. Sometimes, I hold it in my hand when we’re on our way to a race.
“I keep it with me,” I tell her. She smiles at me, then rubs her thumb across the soft fur.
“So, what did Dad want?”
“Nothing. We’re getting a new teammate in Miami, so we have to hold our place somehow by placing top three in the race.”
“That’s going to be hard by points alone.”
I check my mirrors and ease the truck forward. “It is what it is. We don’t have a choice.”
The radio plays softly in the background. Once I get us on the highway, I turn it down and ready myself for the five different conversations we need to have. I still haven’t figured out how to approach the conversation about my family. I think that one will be the worst.
“How am I going to tell Dad?” she whispers. “I can’t bring myself to disappoint him. He’s the one good parent I have. I’m aware that this is all a shock, and now we’re getting married. Is it right to tell him that the baby isn’t yours, too?”
I don’t answer her because I know what lies and deceit do to a family. So my answer is yes, tell him the truth, but he can be rest assured she and the kid are taken care of. I will do whatever it takes for them. I’ll hire an army if I have to. He may not see it that way, though. Hell…she may not see it that way.
We sit in silence, driving along the relatively lonely highway. There is a trailer behind us and ahead of us as we make our first stop in Dallas. This all feels backward. I’m still reeling at the fact that Cordi is mine. She wants to be mine.
“What are you thinking about over there?” she asks.
I check my mirrors and change lanes. “I’m thinking about how we’ve done all of this backward. I haven’t even taken you on a date.”
“Oh,” she says shortly.
“I don’t think it’s a bad thing. I realized that I need to do a few things.”
“Oh.”
I laugh and glance at her. “Is that the only word in your vocabulary now?”
“No, I …we are different now, and you keep leaving me speechless.”
“I’d rather leave you breathless if I had a choice,” I mutter.
She groans, and I peer at her again. “What?”
“You really need to watch what you say around me unless you’re going to make good on your promises. I am pregnant, and there are a lot of hormones flying around.”
“Oh,” I mutter. She bursts into laughter.
“Is that the only word in your vocabulary?” she says, mocking me.
I smile, and her eyes gleam at me. “No, gem, but I can think of a few running through my head right now.”
“Ooh, kinky,” she says with a smile in her voice.
“I guess you’ll have to wait and see.” She groans again and shifts in her seat. I chuckle and reach for her thigh, squeezing it once. “Now I’m taking notes.” She sighs and crosses her arms. “Plus, I want you begging for me when I can see every inch of you. The passenger seat of a truck that I’m driving is not going to cut it.”
“Oh,” she says thickly.
“Yeah, gem. Oh.”